I find myself completely without a topic this evening. I knew this day would come. I have been jotting down anything and everything since I started this project and I have a list of dozens of potential blog topics. Even with all the ideas and outlines in my reserves, today I feel listless and not into writing. This is the hardest time to do it. This is also when I have to do it.
I think what adds to this are that the last 2 days haven't been the greatest 2 days. There's been a bit of bad luck and bad energy around me which I can't help but absorb sometimes. The good news is that it doesn't consume me any longer. In the old days I'd be pissed off, sad or cranky for a day or two before I figured out how or why. These days I catch myself after 5-10 minutes of feeling negatively from something I picked up in the air. Then I take the steps to enhance my mood. I'd like to get to the point where that stuff just bounces right me off like I was rubber. Yes, my goal is to be rubber.
After the back tire on my bike broke on the way home for lunch, right after the place I get lunch from occasionally was closed for 5-10 minutes and I couldn't get the lunch I wanted nor did I have the time to wait for them to open, I felt a little stressed. Not angry but stressed. I had to whip up something at home when I badly need to go grocery shopping and I had only 25 minutes to cook and eat. Time crunches can ramp up the tension. Plus now I had to walk back to work which would take about 10 more minutes than biking there. I had to scarf and scurry. Strangely though, I was really calm and deliberate as I approached a street corner about a block from my house. A car was waiting at the stop sign. I waited, they went. As I started to cross another car arrived at the intersection. He didn't stop or wait and scared the crap out of me. With my history I don't need close calls with cars. Few things can get me more on edge than seeing my past flash before my eyes... seeing my body bouncing on a car and getting catapulted through the air. I hate reliving that experience but when I have a near miss with a vehicle, it comes back. The 4+ months of rehab, the crutches and the purple ass... it was purple for almost a month!
So after that happened I marched back to work, more than a little annoyed. I sat down at my desk and proceeded to exorcise the demons, so to speak. Within 10 minutes I was good again. How did I do this? Well I've stated in the past that music can bring me back to happy and I use it often but this time I smothered my growing bad mood with kindness. I got back to work and proceeded to do some nice things for people. I wrote a nice email to one person, complimented another, offered to help yet another and intentionally made another person laugh.
I managed to take bad energy in its' developmental stage and somehow released and transformed it into kindness that turned my frown upside down. Now that's green energy! This is cooler than Mr. Fusion in Back to The Future turning beer cans and banana peels into time traveling energy! Well, maybe not. But I didn't know I was capable of using bad emotions and releasing it in a good way. Every new day is a learning experience I guess.
Anyway the point is, you're bound to run into jerks, bad luck and unfavorable situations out there and it's okay if you get down every once in a while. It's only natural. Things are going to get to you from time to time. I'm learning the key is not to let things keep you down. When you get knocked down, don't stay there and whine. Don't throw a pity party on the floor or try to grab someone else and drag them to your level. Deal with it and let it go. Get back up as quick as you can, dust off and come up with a new plan. And if you are already on your feet and you see someone else on the ground, extend a hand and help them up. It's worth it.
Well, that's today's life lesson for me... and I thought I didn't have anything to talk about.
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