As I was walking home Tuesday night I reached into my pocket to pull out my phone. I wasn't looking to make a call or check my messages; I just wanted to know the time. When the display lit up I was astonished. It was a few minutes past midnight. What the hell was I thinking? It was a work night.
It was my friend's birthday that day and we went out for a few drinks but if I remember correctly he went home somewhere around 10:30. I sat on the patio of Caffe Aroma, my home away from home, and my friend and I struck up a conversation with a couple of Buffalo State students. Both were females and they were kind of entertaining if not interesting so we chatted... and chatted... and chatted. I think we spoke for almost an hour.
The chattier of the two was this strong female. She was the kind of girl who'd put a guy in headlock, right after insulting him. She spoke freely and inappropriately but it amused me and as always I was locked into the moment so I enjoyed it. The other girl was a little quiet but she had a good reason. She had quite an accent and it wasn't always easy to understand her English. She was a Greek girl, sexy and mysterious with big beautiful hair but I wasn't into her other than physically. I need more than that. I need a connection, mentally, emotionally, spiritually. The looks are the bonus. You see, with me looks aren't everything. They aren't even most of it but I digress.
This is just one of nearly a dozen examples of recent events. I find myself talking to women easily and freely which is something I've hardly ever been able to do. With the online dating thing, I'm getting a good amount of messages and for once in my life I actually have to consider who I want to talk to. Usually I set my sights on one person and when that's over I start again, sometimes with a very long break in between, lol. Nowadays I'm feeling good and it's starting to show.
I'm starting to take on ambitious projects and dreams are coming true. 2010 is truly going well. I'm losing weight, making good choices, and enjoying amazing experiences. I'm channeling creative energy in wonderful ways, my wit feels sharper than it has been in years, my charm is up, and my confidence is up. It's feels like I'm entering my prime... at 36! What can I say, I'm a late bloomer.
Things are going well in my life right now in most areas and I love it. I feel like I have more power, more skill and more energy but I don't know if I really do. I probably have all the tools I've always had but been afraid or unwilling to use for some reason. Something has brought all of it out and I am grateful. My confidence is at an all time high and I feel like the sky is the limit.
I was going to write "this is my year" but forget that. Dream big I say. This is my life!
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