MINE! (2-27-10)

I’m bending down to pick up hundreds of CDs scattered across the floor and I am angry that I am doing it. On one hand the bastard who did this should be made to clean up this mess but on the other hand I realistically know that’s not going to happen and my boss who is in her 50’s and just weeks away from knee replacement surgery is practically the only one cleaning up. I can’t let her do this on her own even if I hate the reason why we’re doing it. I have a sense of what’s right unlike the person who left the room this way minutes earlier.

It was around 5pm and the building was empty except for me and my boss who was a few rooms over. I was on my computer at my desk and listening to the end of the United States/Finland Olympic hockey game. The U.S. had the game well in hand and my mind began to drift from work to my plans for the evening. I was going to go see Shutter Island with a few friends and I was very excited. Suddenly there were raised voices coming from the room my boss was in. She was arguing with the son of the owner. He’s the Executive Vice President of the company but he’s a spoiled child who thinks he’s entitled to everything and has a hissy fit whenever he hears the word no. Little did I know how bad his fit today would be.

It’s all about a battle of 2 companies in 1 company. I know what you are thinking, that doesn’t make sense. Basically he is trying to take over everything from within and we have been and continue to be in his sights. So we fight for survival but in reality our fight has been pointless. His father and the rest of the company say they are on our side and show sympathy towards us but no one will tell him no or stand up to him.

To summarize, we used to be one happy company. He would buy merchandize for us (with his father’s money) and we would sell it. He’d buy a little for himself as well but it would be specific items and not really in conflict with what we were doing. Then a few years back he began to get greedy and upset. My boss rejected his crazy ideas one too many times and he became spiteful. He turned into Fredo Corleone from the Godfather. He wanted respect because of who his father (the owner and creator of the company) was but as we all know respect can only truly come from who you are, not what your last name is. He stopped coming to us with ideas and went straight to his father, pointing out every little thing we were doing wrong, even if what we were doing wasn’t really all that wrong. He’d say there was a better way to do it and we won’t listen to him. Over time he convinced his father he was onto something and he had that better way and then he started his own large scale online sales company. Now why a company needs 2 separate online sales companies selling the same things, I’ll never know but for the last 2 years it’s been this way.

This past year has been the roughest with at least half our staff being let go and with him getting 90% of the merchandise bought “for the company”. You’d think his father, if he wouldn’t say no to him would close us down and be done with it but for some reason he doesn’t want to give his son everything… although most times it seems like it. The latest blow is that he is giving his son the building our crew has been in for a decade or more doing our thing. First he steals our business, now he is going to steal our building. We showed this failed idiot how to do online business now he is taking it all from us. It must be nice. It must be nice to have someone else take all the risks, show you the way and then you ride the thing home when you realize it’s safe. Let’s also mention that with our crew, the father gets all the profit, but his son’s business seems a little more complicated. I’m not sure how much the father is getting back but you can be sure the son is keeping a chunk for himself. Meanwhile I’ve seen friends lose their jobs because of greed and ego.

So the end result is we are now moving into the same building as our Main and Lafayette record store. It’s a smaller space but we have a smaller crew so maybe it could work. Hopefully being in a different building would mean seeing less of this douche and being free to do things without him telling his daddy that we’re selling things too cheap, or too fast or too slow or whatever else he can find wrong. So where were we?

I’m sitting at my desk and I hear the raised voices and I’m thinking oh crap. He’s getting our building but he wants to move in immediately. Meanwhile we have 30,000 things for sale online. You can’t physically move that much stuff without some time. We have been working on it all week but of course a 1-2 month job should be a 1-2 day job in the eyes of someone lacking reason and logic. His opinion is that we should leave all of our merchandise behind for him. That would get us over there quicker, lol. Then his brainstorm was that we should move out right away and then he would make sure we’d get 70% of our stuff back after he organized it. Again that’s laughable in that he would simply take all the best stuff and give us the less desirable items. Unfortunately his father didn’t think that idea was so bad earlier this week and the son thought he had a sucker but then when the old man discussed it with my boss and a company vice president they saw the idea for what it was, a way for him to steal a bunch of good stuff from his dad and sabotage us at the same time. Miraculously they told him no. Needless to say, he was not pleased.

The raised voices turned to outright screaming within seconds and then I heard a loud glass shattering crash. I jumped up from my desk and walked 2 rooms over into a larger area where the son was yelling at my boss, a company vice president and his father, the old man himself. He heard me come rushing into the room and screamed my name; “ED! DON’T YOU HAVE TO LIST?” Listing is the act of listing items online for sale, which is what I was doing prior to the spectacle. I looked at him coldly. He rephrased the question again screaming at me and basically telling me that I should be at my desk working. I didn’t say a word but I did raise my right hand and showed him a single finger.

I came into the room wondering if he had hurt my boss but there were actually 3 people in the room with him including the top 2 people in the company. Would that matter? He continued to scream back and forth with my boss and then in a fit of rage he grabbed boxes of brand new CDs from a colleague’s desk and threw it across the room. CDs were flying everywhere. He grabbed another box, and then a cardboard tray full of more CDs and flung it. Suddenly hundreds of CDs were all over the floor. He temporarily stormed out with a barrage of screaming and insults.

I remember thinking I was happy his father could bear witness to this. I had encountered this spoiled brat doing this a few times, although not to this extent. In a way I thought this was great. Everyone who mattered could see him for the psycho he is. Maybe he’d hang himself today.

I walked across some of the wreckage to see if my boss was alright because most of the venomous tirade was directed at her. Then the son storms back into the room screaming and throwing around more stuff. He grabbed shopping carts full of merchandise and threw them over. He grabbed more boxes and trays of CDs and threw them on the floor and actually some landed on his 80-something year old father’s foot although he didn’t seem hurt or anything. He grabbed a ceramic mug and smashed it on the wall, then grabbed an apple and threw that into a wall while screaming and with fire coming out of his eyes. Forgive me for saying this but I started to hope he’d stroke or have an attack of some kind. I’d never seen someone flip out like that ever. On one hand it was really scary because he was capable of doing anything to anyone but on the other hand it was the saddest, sorriest display I’d ever seen. This was a baby throwing a tantrum because he wasn’t getting what he wanted. This was someone who felt entitled screaming MINE! like a child.

After he finished trashing the 2nd room he glared at us with demonic intensity. He screamed at me again; “ED! YOU SHOULD BE WORKING RIGHT NOW! YOU SHOULD BE AT YOUR DESK!” I didn’t reply. I looked a hole through him. I was both scared and angry. Would he attack me? If I said something to him he might. If he attacked me though it would be the biggest mistake of his life because I would defend myself and I would have f-ed him up something fierce. After all the things he’s done to me or tried to do to me over the last few years there’s no one I despise more than this tool.

He wasn’t through with me yet. He didn’t get a response from me but he could probably tell by my face that I was very angry. He yelled “YOU LOOK LIKE YOU WANT TO SAY SOMETHING, YOU WANT TO SAY SOMETHING TO ME?” I didn’t move a muscle. “YOU WANT TO SAY SOMETHING?!?” Finally I replied; “Yeah, I want to say something”. Quickly his father turned to me and said “Don’t say anything”. It was like we were at the zoo and the zookeeper was telling us not to feed or provoke the animals.

The son realized that I wasn’t going to engage so after a few more screaming rants he departed this time for good. I took a look around at the damage. Hundreds of CDs were everywhere. Maybe a maybe DVDs were on the floor. Also a lot of books and all kinds of knick knacks were scattered about. My boss started to cry and was pleading with the old man that he does something about his son. He just seemed ambivalent about it on the outside. I’m sure he was upset, disappointed, embarrassed and who knows what else internally but he seemed so cold and distant on the outside. Maybe he was in disbelief.

I worked my way over to my boss who was bordering on hysterical and I gave her a big hug. While I did that I saw what made that initial glass breaking sound that sprung me from my desk and into the tirade. It was a laptop computer that one of my co-workers uses. He threw that at or towards my boss and it hit the wall and shattered. Add that into all the CDs that had cracked or smashed cases and he made well over a thousand bucks of damage. Plus now we’ll have to take all the damaged CDs offline because if the case is damaged they are not new. Yeah we can give it a new case but we’ll have to remove the factory seal to do it and that’s not something that can be replicated.

Was the police called? No. Was anything done right after this unfortunate incident occurred? Again no… but there was a huge mess to be cleaned up. I was of the opinion that the jerk that did it should be responsible to clean it, or maybe he should send some of his staff to clean up but that wasn’t going to happen no matter how much I wanted it to. My idealistic sense of honor was again rendered useless by an evil, evil man who never has to pay for what he does. It burns me but what can I about it. My presence alone in this company infuriates him so at least I have that going for me. (FYI- He’s tried to have me fired a few times but has no real authority over me so he was denied)

My boss settled down a bit, got it together and started to pick things up from the floor. The old man sat there… he’s nearly 90 so we weren’t expecting him to get on the floor and pick things up. The vice president was kind of talking with the old man and it was just my boss picking things up. I was supposed to leave but I called my friend and delayed my plans a little bit. I couldn’t leave her to pick everything up by herself. So we both were doing it and thankfully the building engineer showed up and helped out to so we got everything picked up in about a half hour.

As usual with this company nothing will come of this other than stories and blogs but this spoiled idiot is getting awfully close to going completely over the edge. Will it happen? It just might. We are moving out of our building to accommodate this fool but it appears that day when we are done can’t come fast enough. I hate that this evil man can get away with this crap constantly but it does make me happy to still be around to give him the finger every once in a while. People say why don’t you get another job? It’s not that easy. I have a loyalty to my boss and I know if I left it would be harder for her and our branch of the company to survive and I do take a measure of pleasure from the fact that my daily presence pisses the son off. I feel like in some way if I leave he wins. I know that’s not rational. In a darker sense, I think I also stay because I want to see the day when he melts down and digs his own grave. If today was any indicator that day may be coming.

The 50 Best Debut Albums of My Experience:

Introduction: Welcome to my top 50 Debut Records. There are several things to keep in mind: The first is this is my list, so my rules. Secondly, I appreciate feedback but not things like “your list is stupid”. If you disagree with any placements or omissions, tell me what you’d do different and why. Lastly remember, there are NO RIGHT answers, it’s all relative and it’s all good. If Kenny Loggins floats your boat, that’s wonderful. Music is amazing in that it means so much to so many and very impressively, it brings us together. In fact, if you made a list of the top 10 things that bring us together, you’d find so many negative events like war, violence, hatred, or tragedy. Music may be the number one positive thing that brings all of us together!

I know what you are thinking; Ed, why are you doing this? My first reason is because I feel like it. I often live in the moment and at the moment I started this it seemed like the thing to do. Secondly, I’m doing this because I am interested how people feel after seeing this list. Do you agree, disagree? Did I leave something out? I like the discussion. Thirdly, I want to come back to this list a few years from now and see what I think then. Every week I discover some new band or record and I’m sure if I did this list even 3 months from now there would be noticeable changes. I always like looking back at things I wrote in the past and thinking what a tool I am. Do you do that? Do you look at your previous writing, or your previous work and think what was I thinking? I always believe that we are our wisest, smartest and awesomest at this moment. We are so much more awesome than we were yesterday. We are wiser and smarter too. So looking back at this list down the road might be as much fun as putting it together now.

This took me 3-4 weeks of research, listening, re-listening, and love. I’d work on a little bit each day and finally it’s done. So Let’s Get it Started!


Preface:

Before we begin with the actual list here are things you WON’T find on this list:

-Debut records I don’t know or haven’t heard so I can’t in good conscience put them on this list. Maybe I’ll get to them one day and they’ll crack a future list.

Apologies to: the Beatles, The Who, the Stones, MC5, Bob Dylan, the Band, Beach Boys, Black Sabbath, Love, Big Star, Cream, Traffic, Roxy Music, Booker T & the MGs, Cheap Trick, Genesis, Queen, The Ramones, Elvis, etc.

-Great bands/Artists with so-so debut records who got better as they went along:

Way to pace yourselves: Radiohead, Prince, Wilco, David Bowie, Alanis Morissette (Jagged Little Pill was her 3rd record), Feist, Sloan, Spoon, Stereolab, Andrew Bird, Ani DiFranco, Flaming Lips, T.Rex, Green Day (Dookie was their 3rd record), White Stripes, Billy Joel, Bob Marley & the Wailers and on and on.

-Some bands who won’t make this list simply because I don’t like them (remember my list, my rules):

Gets the Gas Face: Pearl Jam, Led Zeppelin, Aerosmith, CCR, Black Crowes, Oasis.


Honorable Mention: Good debut records that didn’t quite make the cut: (they get lovely parting gifts)

• De La Soul – 3 Feet High and Rising
• Sade – Diamond Life
• The Beta Band – The Three EPs
• Dr. Dre – The Chronic
• REM – Murmur
• Tori Amos – Little Earthquakes
• Doves – Lost Souls
• Super Furry Animals – Fuzzy Logic
• Stray Cats – Stray Cats
• Maxwell – Maxwell’s Urban Hang Suite
• Kool and the Gang – Kool and the Gang
• Modern Lovers – The Modern Lovers
• Eminem – The Slim Shady LP
• Fugazi – Repeater
• Postal Service – Give Up
• Curtis Mayfield- Curtis
• Massive Attack – Blue Lines
• St. Vincent- Marry Me
• D’Angelo – Brown Sugar
• AC/DC- T.N.T.
• ABC – The Lexicon of Love
• NAS – Illmatic
• Morrissey – Viva Hate
• Wire – Pink Flag
• Gang of Four – Entertainment!
• Daft Punk – Homework
• 3rd Bass – The Cactus Album
• Nirvana – Bleach
• Barenaked Ladies – Gordon
• Le Tigre – Le Tigre
• Lenny Kravitz – Let Love Rule
• LL Cool J- Radio
• Alicia Keys – Songs in A Minor
• Norah Jones – Come Away With Me
• Jimi Hendrix – Are You Experienced?
• PJ Harvey – Dry
• N.W.A. – N.W.A and the Posse
• Interpol – Turn on the Bright Lights
• Echo & the Bunnymen- Crocodiles
• Depeche Mode – Speak & Spell
• Run DMC – Run DMC
• Bloc Party – Silent Alarm
• Modest Mouse - This Is a Long Drive for Someone with Nothing to Think About
• Gorillaz – Gorillaz
• Poe – Hello

Without any further ado

My 50 Best Debut Albums:


50. Stone Temple Pilots – Core: One of the things I disliked about “grunge” was how murky it felt. I didn’t like a lot of the bands that came out of the Seattle scene and the primary reason was that it seemed too much kind of like how once upon a time Slayer was a little too much for me but Motley Crue was just fine. In that same vein, while Soundgarden, Alice in Chains, Pearl Jam and many others didn’t do it for me, Stone Temple Pilots seemed like a breath of fresh air in a smoky room. It felt like grunge without the grunge. Unlike most of those bands this had a bit of glam, finish and style to it and whether or not that was Scott Weiland’s fault, I don’t know but this unlike those other records clicked with me and remains a classic.

Recommended Tracks: Plush, Creep, Wicked Garden, Dead & Bloated, Sex Type Thing

49. The The – Soul Mining: An ex-girlfriend introduced me to Matt Johnson aka The The about 10 years ago. This is one of those bands a lot of people don’t know about and for good reason. Matt has always maintained a pretty low profile and his penchant for experimenting with everything from country to dark dance music makes it harder to put a name to the beat, so to speak. Many The The records are very different from the one before it which makes it hard to build a fanbase. To make a long story short, if you were going to buy one start with their/his official debut Soul Mining. The record is dancing in the rain, skipping in the sunshine and laying in the grass without a care in the world. This record is fun but not outrageous fun, it’s more the kind that will just put a big smile on your face for a while. The dancey pop music has a bit of darkness to it, but that’s what makes it so attractive.

Recommended Tracks: Uncertain Smile, This is the Day, Perfect, Giant

48. Whiskeytown – Faithless Street: In the footsteps of Uncle Tupelo, the Replacements and Bruce Springsteen came Ryan Adams and Whiskeytown. This was alternative country as it was called back then but it had an edginess to it due to Adams’ powerful and passionate delivery. This is down home warm weather late afternoon music for people who can appreciate the balance of rock and country and not want to sleep with their relatives.

Recommended Tracks: Midway Park, Top Dollar, Here’s To The Rest of the World, Faithless Street, Empty Baseball Park, Yesterday’s News

47. Sex Pistols – Nevermind the Bollocks, Here’s The Sex Pistols: This is the record your mother warned you about. It’s full of angst, anger and venom and one listen is all it takes to know this is an important album. The first time I listened to this all the way through I was so energized I wanted to go outside, break stuff and bring anarchy to my neighborhood. Instead I probably got together with a friend or two and talked a lot of crap about breaking things and probably brought anarchy to the Pizza Hut buffet.

Recommended Tracks: God Save the Queen, Submission, Anarchy in the U.K., Pretty Vacant, Holidays in the Sun

46. Jesus & Mary Chain – Psycho Candy: You know this is a fine debut record when you consider the 1st track on this 1st record could very well be their best song! Psycho Candy is probably one of the most influential records you’ve never heard as the impact was well below the radar but important nonetheless. Bands like Mazzy Star and My Bloody Valentine may never have existed without this band and this record.

Recommended Tracks: Just Like Honey, Never Understand, The Living End, Taste of Cindy

45. Funkadelic – Funkadelic: Before the mothership landed on planet Earth and before Parliament smoothed out the funk sound, Funkadelic led one nation under a groove that just happened to get down for the funk of it. If you heard this record you might be a little surprised. It’s not the George Clinton you came to know much later on. This record brings the funk but also packs a soulful punch, perhaps due to the time (1970) and that George wasn’t too far removed from a soul/doo wop group himself. You can hear the formula for funk starting to come together and this record started a run of 3 great Funkadelic records in a row through Maggot Brain.

Recommended Tracks: I Got a Thing, I Bet You, Mommy What’s a Funkadelic, Good Old Music

44. Lauryn Hill – The Miseducation of Lauryn Hill: When Lauryn left the Fugees there wasn’t too much expected. Everyone assumed Wyclef and Pras were the primary creative forces behind that group and Lauryn was simply a voice and not the big time talent she proved to be. Credit Lauryn with bridging the gap between hip hop and soul. This record had me nodding my head the way I would listening to a hip hop record.

Recommended Tracks: Doo Wap, Everything is Everything, Sweetest Thing, Ex-Factor

43. G Love & Special Sauce – G Love & Special Sauce: When I first heard G Love and Special Sauce it was on a very early Late Night with Conan O’Brien. They performed “Baby’s Got Sauce” from this 1st record. I thought man this was a band that was having fun and doing it cool. I became an instant fan and remained so throughout the 90’s until their later work started to slip and I lost interest. Above, I have a small list of bands or artists whose first record was ordinary and the greatness came later. These guys were the opposite. Their first record was great. The second was good. The third was fine. The 4th was okay and so on. The bluesy hip hop style is perfect for a summer night with friends or any chilled out occasion.

Recommended Tracks: The Things I Used To Do, Garbage Man, Blues Music, Baby’s Got Sauce, Cold Beverage

42. Ryan Adams – Heartbreaker: When Whiskeytown dissolved I was just getting into them and then to find out they were no more, well I was not pleased but when I heard Heartbreaker I knew everything was going to be alright. Ryan matched all the Whiskeytown efforts with Heartbreaker and even broke new ground as a songwriter with somewhat hopeful tones on a few tracks. Upon hearing this you could tell this was the beginning of something big and 10 records later this prolific and talented artist continues to grow.

Recommended Tracks: To Be Young, Why Do They Leave, Oh My Sweet Carolina, Come Pick Me Up, My Winding Wheel

41. Public Enemy – Yo Bum Rush the Show: P.E. exploded onto the scene in 1987 and in doing so ripped hip hop and rap music off the road it was on and sent it into a whole new direction. With Chuck D.’s relentless rhymes and delivery and Flavor Flav adding his spastic takes on the tracks, this was the future revealed. You could tell 2 things about Public Enemy by listening to this record: 1- They were among the most important voices in rap right out of the gate and 2- They were only scratching the surface of their skills. When the next record came out we expected it to be better and it was. This was a truly important group, especially during the first 10 years of their career.

Recommended Tracks: Public Enemy #1, Miuzi Weighs a Ton, Timebomb, You’re Gonna Get Yours

40. Strokes – Is This It: One of the newest records on my list. You have to keep in mind that it’s tough to take a recent debut record and say it’s one of the best ever. Part of what makes a record great is staying power and how it sounds years after the initial buzz and novelty has worn off. That’s why a record from 2001 is being considered a recent one on a list like this. Recapturing the late 70’s New York city rock scene, The Strokes perfected the sound. There was a lot of hype surrounding this record and it was well deserved, even converting the non-believers after they took a full listen. This record was just too good for the first time out and while they released 2 solid records later, they were never able to catch the magic in a bottle they had with Is This It.

Recommended Tracks: Someday, Take it or Leave It, Last Nite, The Modern Age

39. Replacements- Sorry Ma, Forgot to Take Out the Trash: All puns aside, this record is complete garbage. It’s messy, sloppy and they sound like they are either drunk off their butts playing the record or they can barely play a chord. As far as punk rock goes, try to find a band or a record that sounds like this. It’s as unique a record as you can find from the time period it came out in and when you take into account what the Mats did later on and how different they sounded, it makes this record even more of a rare classic. The record is loose, ridiculous and a ton of fun. This is rock N roll with punk, garage, booze and who knows what else thrown together and played very fast… and great.

Recommended Tracks: Johnny’s Gonna Die, Takin a Ride, Shut Up, I Hate Music, Customer, Otto

38. Talking Heads – 77: Out of that aforementioned late 70’s New York City rock scene came the Talking Heads and their unique sound. Odd but catchy they were tough to predict but easy to enjoy and this record really laid down the groundwork for a noteworthy career of unusual gems.

Recommended Tracks: Psycho Killer, Don’t Worry About the Government, Uh-Oh Love Comes to Town, and Sugar on My Tongue & I Wish That You Wouldn’t Say That (from 2005 reissue)

37. UB40 – Signing Off: When people think of UB40 they think of Red Red Wine, and even worse their cheesy poppier sounding music from the late 80’s and 90’s. On their debut record Signing Off this couldn’t be farther from the truth. The 1980 release showed an English reggae sound that was unique and powerful. With elements of Dub and political and social commentary throughout the record, Signing Off plays like a chilled out yet powerful release and made UB40 look more like a reggae version of the Clash than what they are remembered for now. It’s by far their best release and one of the best English reggae records ever.

Recommended Tracks: Tyler, Burden of Shame, King, Food For Thought, 12 Bar

36. Snoop Doggy Dogg – Doggystyle: Snoop debuted in a way many of us wish we could. He was a guest rapper on several tracks of Dr. Dre’s largely successful “The Chronic” a year or two before releasing his own record. How can you do better than that? You guest on a smash record that introduces you to the world and wets their appetite for your own work. There’s one catch though. Your record had better be good or else you would probably disappear as fast as you rose to the top. With Snoop’s Doggystyle we know what happened. He became arguably the biggest star in rap.

Recommended Tracks: Gin and Juice, Who Am I, Serial Killa, Murder Was the Case That They Gave Me, Lodi Dodi

35. The Stone Roses – Stone Roses: Quite simply this record influenced all 90’s British pop and rock music. Ian Brown’s cool vocal and the uptempo tracks were a match made on the hipster dancefloor. The Stone Roses made British music fun again and although their contributions were fairly brief, this record goes down as one of the best ever. I confess that the first time I heard this I didn’t totally “get it”, but several years later, perhaps when I had learned that British music didn’t have to be droning guitars and vocal flamboyance, I realized how great a record this is.

Recommended Tracks: I am the Resurrection, She Bangs the Drums, I Wanna Be Adored

34. Yeah Yeah Yeahs – Fever To Tell: Although they released a few small EPs prior to this, Fever To Tell marks the 1st full length record of this still improving group. The record goes all over the place with volume, depth, crashes and burns but makes up for the messiness with some amazing songs. The record starts out beating your behind and ends up making you misty. It’s a strange ride but one you won’t forget.

Recommended Tracks: Y Control, Rich, Maps, Date With the Night, Pin

33. The Jam – In The City: The Jam were very unique, even among the dozens of punk bands coming out of England in the 70’s. They were unique because they were not really a “punk” band. Yeah there were some punk rock tendencies but more often than not there were also nods to Motown and classic R&B music. The mixture of styles separated them from the pack but they still had the respect the other more conventional punk bands had. That said, In The City is a bit raw in places and shows a good balance of the potential greatness yet to come and goodness already achieved. The energy of the tracks gets you moving and in the end that’s really all that matters.

Recommended Tracks: In The City, Art School, Sounds From the Street, Non Stop Dancing

32. Arcade Fire – Funeral: This is not a record you can hear in passing. You’d be cheating yourself if that were the case. If you have not heard this record yet, you should get yourself a copy, find a place to relax, detach yourself from all distractions and get ready for the beautiful, emotional tidal wave of Funeral. This record has it all: romance, sadness, hope and power. There are catchy tunes and brilliant arrangements. The only thing you can think after experiencing this record is “where have you been all my life”. That’s it. That’s the only bad thing I can say about Funeral is that after you’ve heard it, you wish you had heard it sooner.

Recommended Tracks: Wake Up, Neighborhood #1, Rebellion, Crown of Love, Neighborhood #3

31. Weezer – Blue Album: I was attracted to this record not so much by the sounds, but from what I saw in the band’s first video for Undone, the Sweater Song. I thought wow these guys look like total nerds rocking out, and because I’ve always imagined myself as a member of Lambda Lambda Lambda I was totally into it. Plus the songs weren’t too shabby either, covering many topics I could relate to and most importantly, being catchy as hell. Many claim this record was responsible for influencing Emo which makes me cringe, but it certainly showed those in Indie rock how to Power Pop. It’s really a delicate balance to be popular with the cool kids and crossover to the mainstream no taste kids at the same time but for a short while Weezer made the leap. Inevitably scorn settled in and their 2nd record Pinkerton was panned by critics and fans alike although I consider it right there with the Blue Album in terms of quality, and THIS album has quality.

Recommended Tracks: Say it Ain’t So, Buddy Holly, My Name is Jonas, Undone-the Sweater Song, In the Garage

30. Wu Tang Clan – Enter the Wu Tang (36 Chambers): From the slums of Shaolin, the Wu Tang Clan struck hard with this influential debut. The West coast was riding high and ruling rap with Dr. Dre, Snoop, Tupac and many gangsta rappers leading the way but The Wu Tang Clan struck a blow back for the East Coast and the birthplace of hip hop with the Enter the Wu Tang. The beats were slammin but not duplicates of the G-Funk sound that was sweeping California. The Rza’s production style was a breath of fresh air and the Clan injected something back into gangsta and hardcore rap that was becoming harder to find: fun. As the 90’s went on more and more rappers talked about nothing but bitches, money and violence and the novelty of N.W.A. was replaced by the new norm and boredom. The Wu Tang took the message and evolved it, making it fun again to listen to serious hip hop. I remember many nights in the cars with friends, pumping Enter the Wu Tang and having a great time trying to solve da mystery of chessboxin.

Recommended Tracks: C.R.E.A.M., Method Man, Protect Your Neck, Da Mystery of Chessboxin, Wu Tang Clan Ain’t Nuthin to F*** With

29. The Pretenders – The Pretenders: Few bands have made a stronger opening statement than The Pretenders did on their self titled debut. They come to rock. They come to kick butt and they come to do their own thing. As evidenced by Chrissie Hynde’s unique vocal, the Pretenders and this record may sound a little like this band or that band, but it also sounds a lot like something new and different, which they were. They captured a style all their own that got them lumped in with pop bands, rock bands, punk bands and even new wave bands. Maybe they were all those things but after one listen to the raw emotion in Chrissie’s voice one has to think it doesn’t matter.

Recommended Tracks: Brass in Pocket, Mystery Achievement, Kid, Up the Neck, The Wait, Precious

28. U2 – Boy: Unfortunately when Boy came out I wasn’t really into music that much. I was probably too busy watching Scooby Doo, the Flintstones, Sesame Street, the Electric Company and Tom & Jerry to care. Eventually I started to watch Sha Na Na because my parents watched it. Then it was Solid Gold. Shortly after that I became addicted to this new thing called MTV. The first U2 video I ever saw was Sunday Bloody Sunday. From that point on I jumped aboard but by then U2 had already put out 3-4 records. After buying The Joshua Tree and finding out what an amazing album that was I started to get curious about their earliest stuff. I figured the only record of theirs I had ever heard was their best work (Joshua Tree) so to hear their first record from 6 years earlier would probably be a letdown. I thought it was their 1st time out and there’s probably a lot of growing they had to do. Then I heard Boy and realized they were pretty darn good right out of the gate. From the classic 1st track “I Will Follow” through to the end of the record, this ranks among their best.

Recommended Tracks: I Will Follow, Electric Company, Out of Control, Twilight, Another Time, Another Place

27. Coldplay – Parachutes: I worked at WBNY when this record came into rotation at the station. As I would often do, I talked with other station members about what new stuff was good and a few females mentioned this new Coldplay record. When I was next on air I played “Shiver” and never looked back. I don’t believe this record is as popular or sold as many copies as their subsequent work and that’s a shame. When I heard this record it reminded me what I liked about British pop music and why I hate Oasis. Both are British pop music but Coldplay didn’t take themselves so seriously back then unlike the Gallaghers and you can hear the difference. Plus this record actually had me forget about Radiohead for a few weeks which was saying something back then.

Recommended Tracks: Shiver, Trouble, Don’t Panic, Sparks, Yellow, High Speed

26. Pixies – Surfer Rosa: I’ll start by saying I know Come on Pilgrim came out first, but I really don’t like the idea of using EPs on my list of best debut albums so I am going with the first full length record the Pixies released, Surfer Rosa. And what a record it is! When it comes to the Pixies a lot of times I’m left to wonder, how can music so raw and unbridled be so damn catchy? That’s the magic of this band. Most of the alternative bands of the 90’s and since owe a debt of gratitude to the Pixies and it begins with this magnificent record which rips your arm off and beats you with it.

Recommended Tracks: Where is My Mind, Bone Machine, Gigantic, Vamos, Broken Face

25. Smashing Pumpkins – Gish: Before grunge and the alternative music revolution of the 90’s really kicked in a lot of bands hung under the radar receiving huge critical praise but little commercial attention. One of those bands were the Smashing Pumpkins. Now we all know that later on they blew up something fierce but back in 1991 they released their first album unnoticed by most. Back then they were only really known to college radio and the critics. Often times critically regarded bands stay under the surface and never get the public recognition but the Pumpkins kept going and eventually broke through and became massive for a few years. This debut record is no step down from the records that scored on the charts. In fact, some might argue this record is better.

Recommended Tracks: Siva, Suffer, Daydream, I am One, Bury Me

24. The Police – Outlandos de Amour: The Police were very similar to the Jam in how they separated themselves from the English punk rock pack because they were far more than that. Outlandos de Amor has some punkish sounding tunes plus a few simple sounding ones, but also some heavyweight classics. Much of the songwriting on this record is advanced for a young band hitting the scene with their first record. “Roxanne” is just too good of a song for a relatively new band to write but The Police weren’t exactly kids who hooked up in a band. All 3 members were somewhat accomplished players by the time they hooked up and it shows on this classic record.

Recommended Tracks: Roxanne, Can’t Stand Losing You, Next To You, So Lonely, Hole in My Life

23. Pavement – Slanted and Enchanted: Something you’ll notice about many of the records I have on my list is that they are genre defining records. They are albums that took elements of other styles but used them in such a unique way that they created a new genre themselves. That’s where Pavement comes in. Slanted and Enchanted helped to usher in the indie rock genre and college radio stations everywhere took notice. While too unusual to the mainstream this experimental masterpiece broke down subtle rules of song and paved new roads down which thousands of bands have followed.

Recommended Tracks: Here, Summer Babe, Conduit For Sale, Trigger Cut/Wounded Kite at:17

22. Nine Inch Nails – Pretty Hate Machine: The first time I heard this it was over my head. I wasn’t ready yet. A few years later I had the chance to listen to it again and that time it blew my mind. That probably sums up Nine Inch Nails and Trent Reznor altogether. NIN were ahead of their time. Not many records with such raw emotion are danceable but this one is. Not only that but you can break stuff to it, have relations, workout, etc. It’s an impressive and versatile debut.

Recommended Tracks: Head Like a Hole, Down in It, Terrible Lie, Sin, Something I Can Never Have

21. The Velvet Underground & Nico - The Velvet Underground & Nico: This was another record I didn’t discover until the last decade. Some would say when you discover something that moment must be the right time because that’s when you discovered it, but damn if I don’t feel guilty about not hearing this one sooner. There are so many different types of songs on this record it’s no wonder it was so influential to bands of many genres. Ah, the advantages of having an artist like Andy Warhol as your “producer”. You think someone like Warhol is going to a tell you to tweak songs, or to go for more continuity on the record? The Velvet Underground and Nico is one of the most “free” records you’ll ever hear.

Recommended Tracks: Heroin, I’m Waiting for the Man, All Tomorrow’s Parties, Femme Fatale, There She Goes Again,

20. Violent Femmes – Violent Femmes: When punk rock met folk. The Violent Femmes sounded new and unique at the time and if you listen to this record now, 25+ years later, you might feel the same way. I mean, who sounds like these guys did, especially on this record? There are more timeless classics here than some groups’ greatest hits compilations. Gordon Gano’s voice really drives the record and sets the tone for the angst ridden and self depreciating songs. Even the use of vulgarity is done in a cool and not gratuitous manner. Well before “alternative” music came to prominence in the 90’s this record captured the essence of the sound and deserved a debt of gratitude as one of first and one of the best.

Recommended Tracks: Blister in the Sun, Kiss Off, Gimme The Car, Add it Up, Gone Daddy Gone

19. Blondie – Blondie: Right in the heart of the New York City new wave/rock scene was the attitude of Debbie Harry and Blondie. They weren’t as tough or played as fast as some other bands in the scene but their artistic sensibility was exceptional. More often than not, they knew just how poppy, just how dancey and just how punk rock to be. They knew how to mix genres and styles. They made up for their lack of edginess with an abundance of coolness. How’d they do it? It began and ended with Harry, who was as believable as a sweet girl as she was as someone who shouldn’t be trifled with. Her ability to blow kisses and snarl when needed made her not only a very effective singer but also a huge sex symbol of the late 70’s and early 80’s. That combination of sex appeal and grit is on full display on this fantastic debut.

Recommended Tracks: In The Flesh, Rip Her to Shreds, X Offender, Kung Fu Girls, Look Good in Blue

18. A Tribe Called Quest – People’s Instinctive Travels and the Paths of Rhythm: While not the first of the abstract hip hop bands to emerge from the east coast in the late 80’s, A Tribe Called Quest might be the Best. The Jazz samples, the clever rhymes, and the courage to experiment became calling cards for ATCQ and it’s all on display here. Plus you get the legendary balance and flow of Phife and Q-Tip, whose contrasting but similar styles meshed perfectly. There’s love, humor, social awareness and the type of bragging we are all used to in rap music with none of the thug, pimp or jerk stuff. What more do you need?

Recommended Tracks: Bonita Applebaum, Can I Kick It, I Left My Wallet in El Segundo, Ham n Eggs, Push it Along, Public Enemy

17. The Cars – The Cars: First you take the New Wave sound that is blowing up all over the east coast, then you take some good ol’ rock n roll which never goes out of style and add them together. What the Cars got from that formula was one of the great debuts ever. Every track on this record is good. How many bands can say that about their records let alone their first? The whole album is feel good, hanging with your friends type of music and plays as well today as it did over 30 years ago.

Recommended Tracks: Just What I Needed, Bye Bye Love, My Best Friend’s Girl, Good Times Roll, Moving in Stereo, Don’t Cha Stop

16. Television – Marquee Moon: If you are a fan of drugs and guitars, you might have heard of this record. Actually that’s not fair, as I only like guitars and I have it. That goes to show you the far reaching beauty of this classic debut release. The songs are not just songs, they are art and the extended bouts of guitar are not bothersome but awesome. Maybe the fact that Television dissolved shortly after helped to cultivate the legend but the small body of work the band left behind may be as creative or brilliant as anything any band has ever done.

Recommended Tracks: See No Evil, Marquee Moon, Friction, Venus

15. Ben Folds Five- Ben Folds Five: Much like Weezer impacted the nerds of the world, Ben Folds Five reached out to a similar demographic. Nerds, Geeks and Dweebs of all shapes and sizes chuckled at the witty lyrics and playful delivery of Ben Folds Five. Needless to say BFF didn’t achieve nearly the success and acclaim as Weezer did but on the bright side, that made them cooler for me. Plus while I think Weezer sometimes catered to pop culture, especially during the last decade, Ben only caters to himself and his own experiences. The songwriting on this record are on topics I relate to, understand and find extremely interesting. Plus it seems like there’s a little Elton John, Violent Femmes and They Might Be Giants in there, and if there is how can you complain about that? Ben’s smart-alecky yet non-obnoxiously delivered lyrics entertain and inform and the guitarless band proves a fun and still rocking sound on this debut.

Recommended Tracks: Philosophy, Underground, Julianne, Best Imitation of Myself, Where’s Summer B, Uncle Walter

14. Bruce Springsteen – Greetings From Asbury Park NJ: Here’s a record I didn’t actually hear until this past year (shame on me) but wow, what a great one. Something that is remarkable about this record and that is remarkable about pretty much every one on my list is that the music is so good, so advanced and so right that it is hard in most cases to believe that this is that artist’s first release. Bruce is light years ahead of 99.9% of debut songwriters on this 1st release. He started out way in front and stayed ahead of the pack for most of his career.

Recommended Tracks: Growin Up, It’s Hard to be a Saint in the City, Mary Queen of Arkansas, Blinded By the Light

13. The Clash – The Clash: This is one steady debut all the way through. It kicks your teeth down your throat with the first track, “Clash City Rockers” and continues to do so until the end. There’s fire and passion in abundance and they are just scratching the surface. I think on later records they became more focused in terms of where the fire and passion would go but on this record they are still at their best, just in a more raw way.

Recommended Tracks: White Riot, Clash City Rockers, Police and Thieves, Complete Control, Career Opportunities

12. Pink Floyd – Piper at the Gates of Dawn: This is one of those albums that blows people’s minds. It certainly blew the doors off of rock music and sent it in a new direction. Yeah the record sounds British but to compare this album to stuff that came out at the same time by The Beatles, Rolling Stones, The Who or anyone else is not valid… that’s how unique and distinctive the Pink Floyd sound is. The lyrics are beyond pop music. The guitar work and song structure or lack thereof was very creative and they still managed to have a top 10 album in the UK out of it. When you can be experimental and still very successful, that’s when you know you have something.

Recommended Tracks: See Emily Play, Astronomy Domine, Interstellar Overdrive, Bike, Lucifer Sam

11. New Order – Movement: If you know the history of the band, listening to this record is like listening to a haunting. The band was obviously still reeling from the loss of former singer Ian Curtis and this was the first step without him. The tracks are sad and yet darkly beautiful at the same time, a quality often shared by the Joy Division work. While not an overly long record, there’s plenty of quality to make up for the lack of quantity.

Recommended Tracks: Dreams Never End, I.C.B., Denial, Truth

10. The Smiths – The Smiths: How did British Rock music move from New Wave in the mid-80’s to Brit Pop, Shoegazer and the British Rock that dominated the 90’s? It was mostly The Smiths. They bridged the gap and created something that was imitated right away and very often, even deep into the 90’s. Many of the songs sounded like real art and Morrissey had a hypnotic voice capable of locking you in and making you a believer. For their existence The Smiths wrote a ton of excellent songs and this album like every other Smiths album is full of them.

Recommended Tracks: This Charming Man, Hand in Glove, What Difference Does it Make, Pretty Girls Make Graves

9. Bjork – Debut: When I think of the 90’s musically and what was excellent about it, I can’t help but think of Bjork. For a long while in that decade I was only into the male stuff: Nirvana, Beastie Boys, Violent Femmes, N.W.A, Beck, Tribe Called Quest, etc. but at some point I began to get a little curious. I got curious about this new stuff the ladies were listening to. I started to check out Tori Amos, PJ Harvey, and Bjork. Of the 3, and all 3 are great, I like Bjork best. I’d put on Debut and it’s like a big goofy smile for an hour. That’s what I’m talking about.

Recommended Tracks: Big Time Sensuality, Venus as a Boy, Human Behaviour, One Day, Violently Happy

8. Joy Division – Unknown Pleasures: Listening to this record should really be done with your eyes closed. If you let it, this album can take you away into a dreamworld the likes of which you never knew. I mean it. You should do this at night, turn the lights down, make sure you are alone or with people who will be silent, close your eyes and flip this on. It’s dreaming without being sleep. It is dark and wonderful.

Recommended Tracks: She’s Lost Control, Shadowplay, Insight, Disorder, Wilderness

7. Beastie Boys – License to Ill: It was inevitable right? With Run DMC and others emerging and beginning to put rap music on the map, it was only a matter of time that a novelty act emerged to help crossover the rap genre onto the pop charts. In this case the novelty was that these were 3 white guys but unlike nearly every novelty act that entered the genre afterward, these guys had the skills, charisma and style to pull it off for the long haul. Def Jam could have put any mediocre white rapper group together and they might have scored a hit and got white kids all over the burbs to buy their record but because the Beasties had the skills they not only scored a hit, they scored a monster #1 smash and a lengthy, noteworthy career. While their later work is more critically acclaimed, this record is pure fun.

Recommended Tracks: Fight For Your Right To Party, Brass Monkey, Girls, Paul Revere, Hold it Now Hit It, The New Style

6. Beck – Mellow Gold: I remember asking questions when “Loser” hit the airways: Who is this “loser“ guy? Are all his songs like this one? The answers are I still don’t know who he is and no, his songs are not like Loser. Over the course of his career Beck has experimented and tapped into so many genres that it’s hard to classify him. I believe Mellow Gold fell under the umbrella of Alternative because it was tough to figure out and consequently this record put a reluctant Beck as the figurehead of Generation X. When you hear all the work he’s done over the years this record isn’t that much of a surprise but consider those of us who heard this back when it came out and this is all we knew of him. We were scratching our heads but thoroughly fascinated. The record is creative and fresh and schizophrenic… but in a good way.

Recommended Tracks: Beer Can, Loser, Nitemare Hippie Girl, Pay No Mind, Soul Sucking Jerk

5. Doors – The Doors: "If the doors of perception were cleansed every thing would appear to man as it is, infinite. For man has closed himself up, till he sees all things through narrow chinks of his cavern." -Aldous Huxley. I didn’t hear this record until the early 90’s but once I did I couldn’t stop listening to it. To an 18 year old who is just finding himself, “The Doors” is like crack. Their redefinition of blues rock was unparalleled and combined with the lyrical content of the great poet Jim Morrison with his raw and passionate delivery made for one of the most explosive debut records of all time. Half the songs on this record are some of the best rock songs of all time. How many records, let alone debut records can make such a claim?

Recommended Tracks: Light My Fire, The End, Break on Through, End of the Night, Whiskey Bar

4. Elvis Costello – My Aim is True: Much like Beck but to a lesser extent, Elvis Costello sampled a lot of styles on the way to finding his own. Depending on which track you listen to you can hear traces of punk, folk, twang, new wave and even a little reggae. Even better than his multi-dimensional music style is his lyrical content and delivery. The lyrics are clever and well written with a sarcastic or maybe cynical streak and the vocal delivery is simply legendary.

Recommended Tracks: Alison, Watching the Detectives, Less Than Zero, Miracle Man, (The Angels Want to Wear My) Red Shoes

3. Jeff Buckley – Grace: Listening to the record the first time was reminiscent of the first time I had candy. I wasn’t sure what it was that I had just ingested but it was sweet, great and I had a natural attraction and strong feeling that it would become a permanent part of my life. This and Portishead’s Dummy are my go to albums when I am sad. I think that the tragic death of Buckley before releasing his 2nd record makes this album even more dramatic and more melancholy than it would have been received and remembered otherwise. His voice is quite possibly the best male voice I’ve ever heard in pop music and we will always be left wondering what might have been.

Recommended Tracks: Hallelujah, Lover You Should Have Come Over, Grace, Last Goodbye, Mojo Pin, Forget Her (added on as 11th track on reissues)

2. Portishead – Dummy: Speaking of Portishead’s Dummy, it grabs my #2 spot. This groundbreaking record has every thing I love in music: moody lyrics, strings, beats, razor sharp guitar riffs and a classic female vocal. They took all those things and melded it into a beautiful debut record. Nearly every song on this is a classic and still play as fresh and amazing as they did 15 years ago. This is one of those rare instances where a whole lot of good things are mixed together to make something greater. Too often we take good things, combine them with other good things and have less than good results but with Portishead and this record, it’s like Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups all around. This record is on my if you were stranded on a desert island and you could only take 5 CDs with you list.

Recommended Tracks: Glory Box, Numb, Strangers, Roads, Wandering Star, Mysterons, Sour Times

1. Guns N Roses - Appetite For Destruction: Once upon a time I was writing the names of bands like Cinderella, Def Leppard, and Ratt on my trapper keeper. I ate up all those power ballads and glam metal rock songs. Then one day I heard Appetite For Destruction. A short time later when my butt healed after Guns N Roses had whooped it, I began one of the most important musical journeys of my life when I realized there was more to life than Poison and there was certainly more to rock than Bon Jovi. Guns N Roses broke the chains that bound me to glam metal and from there, once free, I began to test the waters of hip hop, classic rock, alternative and later on indie rock, electronica, and underground things. It’s all because of this record. It takes no prisoners. Thank you Izzy Stradlin!

Recommended Tracks: Welcome to the Jungle, Paradise City, Sweet Child O’ Mine, Mr Brownstone, Out Ta Get Me

Somebody's Watching Me (2-17-10)

I was running very late this morning. It seems to happen every Wednesday because I go to see classic films at the Market Arcade on Tuesday nights and I always get in after 10. I know that doesn’t seem like very late but I’m the kind of person who is always wound up when I return home from being out, especially after seeing a phenomenal movie. It’s a big reason why I don’t go out much on weekdays. It took a few hours to wind down and get sleepy enough for bed. In fact I think it was after 1am when I finally fell asleep.

As a consequence when my alarm went off at 8 this morning I woke up only briefly. Something that is a blessing and a curse this time of year is my comforter. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t have some expensive high quality comforter. I probably have what would be considered a low end one but on these winter mornings when the temperature is always below the freezing point and that first arm or leg pops out of the covers and catches the chill I turtle back inside of them. Half asleep and in between two worlds I think it’s so warm and lovely inside why would I ever come out? Then I remember I have to get up, that’s why there was an alarm sounding. So I sneak an arm out from under the covers to grab the TV remote. Once I have it on and at the right volume I return the controller and my arm disappears back under the covers. That was a close one. There’s such a frosty chill in the air but it’s nice and toasty inside this comforter. I really begin to fixate on how great it feels to be so snug and comfy.

Before I know it, it’s an hour later. Oops! I swear I could get up if I really wanted to! This is something that happens to me every winter. If I don’t HAVE to be somewhere by a certain time, watch out! My work schedule is so flexible and the air is so chilly… it truly is a recipe for oversleeping.

I get out the door and catch the bus to work. As I approach my stop I begin to think, well I’m already late and I haven’t eaten anything yet, maybe I should pick up something on the way there. Yeah, that’s the ticket. Then once I get to work, I’m there the whole time until I pack it in for the day. On an afternoon where the weather may get annoying, one less trip in it is fine with me. Plus there are 2 little restaurants right at my stop. There’s a sandwich place and a Chinese place. Since I stopped at the sandwich place on Monday, I was leaning towards Chinese food today.

I went in and waited 3 minutes or so for someone to come out to the counter like usual. Once he came out I ordered and sat down. I sat facing the window so I could look out at Main Street and the big snowflakes drifting to the ground. I had to wait about 15 minutes for the food so I found myself staring out at Main Street watching the traffic and I drifted into dreamland. I was staring at one particular spot but then again I wasn’t looking at anything because I was inside my mind thinking about my day, planning things, imagining things and probably looking pretty dopey. Do you ever just stare at an object or in a direction and daydream? Do you wonder what your face looks like when you are drifting like that? I don’t. Unfortunately I was making that face for at least 5 minutes before I noticed the movement almost directly in my line of sight.

As it turned out I was staring out at the street and maybe a foot beneath where I was blankly focused (or unfocused) was someone in the passenger side of a car who was now looking in my direction. I immediately turned my head away. I began to feel embarrassed and quite ridiculous. I was staring right above where this person was sitting for 5 minutes! Did they think I was staring at them? It must have looked like it. Did I freak them out? Oh man, why didn’t I notice the person sitting there sooner? That car was there the whole time!

I wanted to get another look at this person just to see what they looked like but I was also mortified that I may have just made them very uncomfortable by staring at them for so long. How long did they know? I took several seconds and thought of ways I could look over there without looking over there. If only I had my black sunglasses. I could have looked in a nearby direction but semi-secretly looked right over at them. I had to figure out a way.

I began to think of ways and this question came over me… why did I need to look again? Why does that matter? Why do I need confirmation? What’s done is done I may as well go on with my day. Besides my food would be ready pretty soon and off to work I would go. Why did I need to look over there one more time? I couldn’t quite place it but something told me that something was off. I mean sometimes our eyes play tricks on us. After a few minutes of yes/no I should/I shouldn’t I finally looked over there casually.

The window was kind of fogged up and it wasn’t easy to see inside, at least not as easy as I thought I would be. Combine that with the now increasing flakes of snow coming down and it was not ideal visibility. I could make out that the person was not an adult because they were a little on the small side and only came up the seat ¾ of the way. Is it okay for an 8 year old to ride up front? I don’t know when it is but I’m pretty sure I rode up front from an earlier age than that so maybe it is but why wouldn’t the kid go inside with the adult? The person had been inside the restaurant next door for at least 5 minutes. Would most people leave a child in a car that long by themselves?

I snuck another look at the kid. The kid had long black hair that came down on and framed her face and peach colored skin but it was difficult to make out anything more than that with the light being brighter inside the restaurant I was in, the snow and with the windows of the car being fogged up a bit. While making that last look she looked right at me and I spun my head and eyes in another direction. Something wasn’t right about that kid. I waited a few seconds and took another look and now the kid was gone! I closed my eyes for a full second and opened them looking to refocus my gaze and the seat was empty. I began to run down all the possibilities. It’s a kid so maybe she’s crawling around the floor of the car. I used to do that. Sometimes you could find neat stuff down there. I remember finding loose change, lost toys and candy that I’ll never admit to eating when I was little and searching the floor of the family car.

I could hear the cook scraping the side of the pan meaning that my food was ready and they were making the transfer from pan to container. Soon I would be leaving and I had to walk right past the car so then I’d know for sure about that kid. I took another quick look over there and still no signs of life from the windows up. The man at the counter called for me and I got up to get my food.

As I headed towards the door of the restaurant I got excited about unraveling this mystery. Let’s not mention that this is a silly mystery of my own making. I live in the moment and this was an important moment. I saddled up and went outside. As I did two women came out of the restaurant next door. Would they be the owners of that car and/or the kid? I stopped and went into my pocket as if I had some urgent thing to do. I pulled out my phone as I stood there and acted like I was checking something as they did in fact move toward the car!

I looked up and still could not see anyone inside the car. Where is this kid? They reached the two front side doors of the car and I thought, was the kid supposed to be in back? If the kid was now on the floor, sleeping, searching, hiding or whatever they would react to it and I would know for sure. The passenger side female opened her door first and let out an “awwwww”. What?!? What’s the kid doing? I wonder if the kid is going to mention the creepy guy who was staring at her the whole time they were inside. I thought maybe I should get a move on and as I started to walk I took one last look at the car and saw the mid-sized dog now on the passenger’s lap.

So the mystery had been solved. It was not a kid sitting in that seat it was a dog. The dog was a black colored dog but with a peach colored face. Through a blurry fogged window, a steady snowfall and with the dog sitting upright in the seat I thought it was a little kid. As I began to make my way down the street I chuckled a few times. I thought to myself “Never a dull moment Ed”. I’m glad I found the answer to the mystery and my instincts informing me that there was something weird about the kid served me well. I’m glad I didn’t leave not knowing if I had accidently scared some kid and made them uncomfortable with my mindless staring out the window of that restaurant but strangely my curiosity grew so significantly that it drowned out my embarrassment. In the end, I had nothing to be embarrassed about. I stared like a zombie for 5 minutes in the direction of a dog without realizing it. The dog didn’t say anything so I think I’m good.

As someone who likes to try to read the signs and react appropriately when it comes to life I wondered what sign life was giving me this morning. What was the meaning of this mistaken identity mystery that wasn’t? What would I have learned from this? I’m thinking that I learned that I’m an idiot. I say that lovingly of course.

Happy Valentine's Day! (2-14-10)

Year after year Valentine’s Day comes and I pretend not to notice. If someone asks me about it I play it cool. I don’t mention the types of things I’ll really be doing. I don’t mention all the rationalizing I‘ll do so that I can convince myself of several things. By the end of the day I’ll convince myself that being single is ideal. I’ll convince myself that eating a box of candy or some other fried, fatty or sweet abomination is perfectly acceptable because it’s a holiday. I’ll convince myself that next Valentine’s Day will be different and I’ll believe it all. At least I will believe for a little while… usually until the 15th.

As it turns out if I look back at the last 10 Valentine’s Days I’ve only had a real honest to goodness Valentine for 1 of them. That’s not a good percentage. Today I mostly managed to avoid the chocolate. I did sample a little cake this morning at brunch, which by the way if you’ve never been, you’re missing out. This morning I went to Rizzo’s for brunch with several friends. Not only was the food quite good but the price was great ($14). It was nearly half the cost of the “famous” brunch at Shanghai Reds and the food was comparable if not better. Plus there was a guy singing standards over pre-recorded music at a low soothing level where you could still easily talk over it. It was quite the relaxing experience.

This evening I saw Casablanca for the first time. I haven’t been avoiding it all these years or anything, in fact I’ve watched a little bit of it here and there over the years but I generally have a policy regarding movies: if I don’t watch it from the beginning then I can’t watch it to the end. Call me a traditionalist but I love to see a film from beginning to end. If I turn on a movie and it is half way through I’ll most likely change the channel within a few minutes, even if I’m enjoying what I see. If it’s really good then I usually make a definite plan to see it in its’ entirety.

My thoughts on Casablanca is that it is very good. Ingrid Bergman looks like an angel in it and I enjoyed most of the characters and the story. Growing up I didn’t watch many old black and white films. I’ve probably seen more the past few months than I had the last decade. As some of you know I joined a movie meetup group and one of the series that I am addicted to is the UB film seminar at the Market Arcade each Tuesday night. This husband and wife team of professors teach a film class that shows up each week to see a classic film and to discuss and ask questions about it afterwards. The movies themselves are great classic films but the discussions afterwards are pretty cool too. If you are free on Tuesday nights and like classic films, I highly recommend it. Plus there are half price concessions at the Market Arcade on Tuesday nights.

Starting this Saturday or next I’m going to be playing on an indoor coed football team. It’s the same league I play in during the fall and spring but now there’s a short term winter indoor league and a few teammates and I couldn’t pass up the opportunity to get that exercise and sharpen our skills a bit for the upcoming spring season. I don’t believe I will play quarterback this time so I have a long way to go to get into shape and improve my stamina and speed so I can be a more effective receiver but I am very confident in my hands, courage and route running so I’ll get there.

To cap off my VD I think I’ll pop in another romantic movie. From my collection it’s between House of Flying Daggers, Say Anything, Better Off Dead, The American President, When Harry Met Sally and Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. Yes I have too many movies. Unfortunately there will be no one to kiss at the end but that’s okay. I am however now accepting applications for next year’s Valentine. Won’t you be mine?

Running Super Bowl Blog (2-7-10)

If you are sick and unable to attend any cool Super Bowl parties and get togethers why not make the most of the time and blog about the Super Bowl as it happens? Well, it sounds like a good idea to me. It is currently 5:30 and at least 50 minutes before kickoff so before we get to the games here are the things I want to see and don’t want to see:

Want to see:

-A shoot out and a close game that keeps my attention to the end.
-A realistic number of good commercials- by realistic I’ll take 1 in 4. If 25% of the commercials are good I’ll be happy
-Pete Townsend destroys his guitar after a killer set by the Who at halftime. That’s realistic right?
-A smidge of weather – Wouldn’t it be cool for once if the wind, temperature or rain was a small factor?
-a New Orleans victory. If I were to make a list of NFL cities that deserve a Super Bowl, the Big Easy would be right near the top with Buffalo, Detroit and Cleveland. New Orleans is an underdog team (in this game) from an underdog city who has never won it, let alone played in the Super Bowl before and winning it all would mean a lot to a city that greatly deserves some good news. How can you argue with that?

DON’T want to see:

-Political commercials during the Super Bowl. It’s football, stick to the dancing squirrels, dumb guys drinking beer, special effects, clever concepts and easy going junk. Leave the political, ethical, righteous crap for more serious programs. I love Jesus, like his style but leave him out of my sports. I love Barack Obama, like his style as well but unless he’s making a prediction or something game related I don’t want to see or hear from him nor his contemporaries in politics.
-I don’t want to see Kim Kardashian all night every time her boyfriend Reggie Bush does something. I’m sure CBS will show her a few times but this might be a blessing that the game is not on FOX which would show her 86 times by halftime regardless of Reggie’s exploits. For that matter I could do with minimal Archie and Eli Manning shots too.
-a nervous, low scoring, turnover filled game

Okay with all that in mind it is nearly gametime so here we go! (Times listed are EST) Special note: All the opinions expressed don’t necessary reflect the views of anyone you should take seriously. I’m just babbling and will repeatedly show that I don’t know what I am talking about. Enjoy!


6:01pm- So we start off with Jay Z. Didn’t he start off the World Series too? Jay Z is one of those rare hip hop stars who have crossed over and still has the street cred. The 90’s were littered with crossover rappers who went pop and then went bust. Perhaps it’s easier for Jay Z than it was for MC Hammer, Tone Loc, Young MC and those guys because back then hip hop wasn’t as mainstream and you really had to meet the pop sound halfway. You had to tweak your sound enough to get on the charts which generated resentment with the hardcore fanbase. Nowadays nothing is bigger than hip hop. It IS the mainstream so guys like Kanye and Jay Z can pretty much do what they want without sacrificing too much and it will go over.

6:07pm- My first winning combination and commercial of the night: Ritz crackers and Earth Wind and Fire. Ritz crackers aren’t too complicated… they are crackers. So why make a complicated commercial? Ritz didn’t and I applaud them for it. They mix in a marching band, Tiki Barber for the football tie-in and Earth Wind and Fire’s Let’s Groove tonight which is scientifically proven to make you groove.


6:10pm- Player introductions… Guys are pretty pumped up. I wonder if we’ll hear any cursing on the field. Speaking of which, with this being the Super Bowl and all I want to see that New Orleans team “300” pre-game ritual up close.

6:16pm- I noticed this is the Hyundai pregame show and that made me wonder if we’ll hear from Toyota tonight. They have as much damage control and trust issues as Tiger Woods right now so I’m thinking this might be a golden, albeit expensive opportunity to start turning it around. Now that I think about it, Tiger should have bought some ad time and tried to start the long road to repairing his image.

6:18pm- Queen Latifah? I thought she was more of a rapper than a singer, Chicago notwithstanding. Needless to say I’ll be a little skeptical.

6:21pm- Okay I liked the presentation and the way the song was done but the Queen may be more of a peasant when it comes to belting out a tune. I’ll give her a B- for a good try though.

6:23pm- I liked Carrie Underwood’s rendition of the national anthem a little better but I don’t know how much she truly loves America, after all she is marrying a Canadian hockey player from Ottawa. She gets a B.

6:28pm- Emmitt Smith’s coin toss almost went right into the Saints. I’m glad it didn’t hit anything or anyone because with as charged up and competitive these guys are right now it might have resulted in a 5 minute argument: “you didn’t call no interference” “no interference doesn’t have to be called, it’s a given”

6:30pm- Phil Simms just said “bad weather brings teams closer together” meaning that it offsets the difference in talent a little bit. It’s a valid point but makes me feel depressed because if you think about it the Bills haven’t made the playoffs in 10 years despite having bad weather some of the time.

6:33pm- Wow aggressive throw by Drew Brees on 3rd down. The man wasn’t open by much and the throw was not that great but at least he missed him long so it wasn’t costly. Between that throw and the play before where it looked like he had happy feet in the pocket I wonder if Drew is a bit nervous. You couldn’t blame him if he is. Although if he is, I hope he snaps out of it soon because that cool customer on the other sideline might put up a few quick scores before the nervous people settle in. In fact his first 3 throws have been perfect!

6:42pm- Although the Saints held the Colts to only a field goal on that opening drive, it didn’t really feel like they stopped the Colts as much as Peyton missed a throw. Still though, 3 is better than 7 against. Now I hope Drew Brees can get it going.

6:43pm- The first funny Super Bowl commercial followed by the pro-life one we’ve heard about all week. The “you’re playing like Betty White” bit was good and then to add Abe Vigoda at the end was frosting on the cake. As far as the Tim Tebow pro-life spot, it wasn’t as offensive as I thought it would be but I still do not think a football game is the time and place for such topics.

6:51pm- Colston taking one off the face, boy that’s embarrassing. Good thing there weren’t 50 million people watching or anything. That basically killed the drive. At least they pinned the Colts down deep in their territory but I don’t like the way this is going so far.

6:53pm- Bud Light commercial, it’s the end of the world what do we do? Bud Light? Really? If the world was going to end I’d sho’nuff be drinking top shelf hooch not bargain basement beer water.

6:55pm- The Colts just ran for 16 on that last play and then 10 more a few plays later. I know the Saints are petrified about Manning and they should be but they cannot give up huge runs. It might be curtains for them if the Colts can run the ball effectively throughout the game because the Colts are actually one of the league’s worst running teams.

7:02pm- The Simpsons Coca Cola commercial was cute but why do you need the Simpsons for that? You could have made the same commercial with no name actors and the same premise. Although right afterwards I give 2 thumbs up to Go Daddy for Danica Patrick getting a massage. Yeah it wasn’t too revealing but at this point in the Super Bowl I’ll take what I can get.

7:06pm- If you thought the voice box song effect hadn’t jumped the shark a year or two ago when every song on the radio was using it, I think it leaped over the shark right now with this Bud Light commercial. I have a theory that the worse a beer is the more you have to advertise for it. Think about your favorite beer and how often you see a commercial for it. Now compare that to how many Bud Light, Coors Light, Budweiser, and Miller Lite commercials you see. I think the only exception to this rule would be the introduction of a new beer but I think you get the point. Also no one give Cher the love she deserves. About 10 years ago she used the voice box effect to a huge top 10 smash song about believing about love after love. No one gives her the credit she deserves… at least as far as that goes.

7:08pm- By the way that Colts touchdown has put my mind on the verge of panic mode. The Saints MUST score on this drive. As I mentioned early on, the Saints had to get past the nerves fast because Peyton isn’t nervous and he is that damn good.

7:12pm- I was just about to ask where Pierre Thomas was but it appears he has been found. The Saints and Drew Brees especially could use the balance of a strong running threat. The Colts defense is fast but not big and strong. If you can run it right at them you can wear them down.

7:16pm- The Saints have to settle for a field goal after a nasty Freeney one armed sack. For the rest of the game the Saints will need touchdowns and not field goals but one this occasion they needed to get on the board so it was nice to get something.

7:20pm- Leno and Letterman in the same commercial… only at the Super Bowl.

7:22pm- I bet that was the first time there were ever two pantsless commercials in a row. Not that I’m counting and not that I am a fan.

7:23pm- Whether you like Brett Favre or you don’t you have to respect that he’ll make fun of himself.

7:25pm- Sometimes it’s better to be lucky than good and Pierre Garcon dropping that 3rd down throw may have kept this game, a game. If he caught that at full speed like he was going he might have had a chance to score. Now if the Saints can score a TD here and tie the game I’ll be thrilled. Oh and quick shout out to the NFL network for using Arcade Fire in their commercial for the draft.

7:37pm- It’s the two minute warning and 3rd and goal at the 1. If I’m the Saints I’m going into 4-down territory here. To have pretty much dominated this quarter of play and come out of it with 2 field goals and to go down at least 4 points at the half is unacceptable. They are bigger on the line of scrimmage than the Colts and it needs to come out here.

7:39pm- I thought Mike Bell was the power back for goalline situations. He looked like Reggie Bush running east and west there. If it’s not there put your head down and get back to the line of scrimmage or at least a half yard to make 4th down more doable. Do not run it wide and lose yardage. Now with a yard and a half to 2 yards to go this becomes a real gamble whether they kick it or not.

7:50pm- I must admit I thought this was going to be a blowout after that first quarter was dominated by the Colts but then the Saints turned it around and owned the 2nd quarter. Unfortunately their huge advantages in time of possession and yards (143 yards to 15 yards) translated only into 2 field goals and left them still facing a 4 point deficit when the 2nd half begins. It was not the exciting offensive shootout I was both expecting and hoping for but it wasn’t a snoosefest either. Now it’s time to recharge the batteries and take in the Who.

8:13pm- Did everyone play along with the Who? It was like they were on the Guitar Hero stage and since it would light up on the beat I assumed if I had a controller and the game I could have played along. It was perfectly fine entertainment but it does seem a bit formulaic since Janet Jackson’s nipple. Ever since then it has been book all time great band/artist, do medley of hits, shoot fireworks, have crazy light show and visuals. It’s a good time albeit safe. I guess like I mentioned about not having political or religious commercials on the Super Bowl, perhaps this is how it should be, established and legendary performers instead of the flavor of the month. It makes me appreciate Prince’s appearance a few years ago a bit more. He played a few hits but also sprinkled in some covers too. How cool was that? You won’t see the Who doing any Bob Dylan tunes up there.

8:22pm- Onside kick to start the 2nd half. Wake up everybody! You have to love the cojones to attempt such a play. If the Colts recovered with a very short field it could very well be 17-6. But with the Saints recovering the kick even a field goal would be good as it would put them within a point but if the Saints were to go up 13-10 with the Colts on their heels, this would be very interesting. Plus it would be the first time tonight that pressure would be on Peyton Manning, who I might add hasn’t really thrown a pass in nearly an hour.

8:27pm- Touchdown Saints! The Saints look unafraid and more importantly have finally found the endzone. They are really starting to click. Drew looks locked in. It’s on now.

8:30pm- What the freak? First Arcade Fire in a commercial and now Grizzly Bear? Maybe I’m not as cool as I thought I was.

8:37pm- As I watch the Colts march right back down the field I’m starting to wonder if the shootout I was expecting in the 1st half may finally be here. Your serve New Orleans.

8:40pm- The KGB woman is fine.

8:44pm- Another commercial concept that has jumped the shark: the e-trade baby. It’s not even the same voice from last year’s commercials. If you are going to beat a concept to death at least maintain continuity so you can really wring out every drop of use from it.

8:59pm- Reggie Wayne has been REALLY quiet thus far.

9:07pm- Watching Drew Brees carve up the Colts secondary with passes all over the field, to all different receivers is like watching football art. It also makes me pine for a real quarterback for Buffalo. It’s been too long. Meanwhile I think it’s a matter of time before the Saints score.

9:15pm- I hope the Saints challenge that 2-point conversion. I’d give it to him.

9:19pm- Wow a 7 point game with 5 minutes and change and the best of the best taking the ball in an attempt to tie it. This is football!

9:21pm- Darn it, I was hoping to go through the whole game without hearing a chicken scream. Oh well.

9:26pm- The Green Police inside of my head! This Audi spot has been my favorite commercial of the night thus far. Yes even better than Danica’s rubdown and the KGB woman. “You picked the wrong day to mess with the ecosystem” http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wq58zS4_jvM

9:29pm- The GAMEBREAKER! Pick 6 by the Saints and finally a team makes a mistake. In a game where no one had turned the ball over and the score was so close it makes sense that the one mistake made by someone could cost their team the game. I have too much respect for Peyton Manning to say this is over but I think I hear the fat lady tuning up.

9:37pm- The best Colts defender Dwight Freeney has either not played in the 2nd half or has been invisible because of his injury. It’s probably no coincidence that Drew Brees hasn’t had much pressure in the 2nd half and has looked amazing. He’s my MVP tonight.

9:43pm- There she goes! It’s over and let the party begin on Bourbon Street. Just a few years back before Drew Brees’ arrival in New Orleans no one would have guessed that a traditionally non successful franchise like the Saints would be winning the Super Bowl. It gives me hope that the little guys can win it every once in a while. I’m sure it also gives hope to the Cleveland’s, Seattle’s, Cincinnati’s, etc.

Who dat? Super Bowl Champs!