This morning I played my last softball game. I have been playing on a ton of teams for the last 7 summers. Most of the time I played on 3-4 teams each year but this summer I only really played on one. I think that may have been a sign. I just wasn't having as much fun out there. My reasons for playing this year weren't even because I was dying to play like I used to feel every summer. It simply was a case of wanting to redeem myself from last season when I hit like garbage. Perhaps it was also a force of habit. Maybe I felt like I had to play because I always have. Regardless, I did it and I hit really well this summer and proved to myself that I still could.
Today was just another example. I went 3 for 3 with 2 singles and a hustle double where I felt like I was running at my best speed of the summer. My sore ankle was cooperating today and my weight is probably as low right now as it has been for a few years so on that first hit I felt like I was flying around the bases. I felt that jump in my step again. It was very satisfying. Despite my solid game we couldn't overcome 1 huge inning by the other team and we fell right out the playoffs and our season ended. If you've seen my facebook pics from today you'll see that I gave everything I had and left some skin on the field out there. That's me, if I commit to do something I go full throttle. I don't give you a half ass job or a lackadaisical effort. I give you everything I have. After I ripped the skin off my leg my captain had the nerve to ask me if I wanted a substitute runner. No way was I coming out. It was just some blood.
Why I'd give up some skin and blood for this team is beyond me. This might have been one of the worst teams I've ever played on. Don't get me wrong, there was some talent on this team but we only had 3 people back from last year and there were all these new people who could care less about everyone else on the team. I compare that to kickball where we are all pulling for each other and there are always kind and encouraging words for everyone... even when someone fails out there. Now that's a team! We go out after the games and we even go out on other nights. My softball team is the exact opposite. 5 minutes after the game ends you'd be lucky to still find 4 of us hanging around at the field. What fun is that?
Another reason why I think my time has come is my desire to do other stuff grows and grows. I've done so many things the past few summers and I'm always up for trying even more! During the summertime in this area there are a million things to do and quite often this summer I had to miss something due to having a game. When I'm out there playing a game and my mind is on what I had to give up to be playing that day, well it's probably a sign I should be doing that other thing.
I'll never forget the rush of winning the league title 2 years ago in August 2008. Before that summer of 2008 I was in bad shape. I spent the winter and early spring rehabbing my ass off from a broken leg and knee ligament damage. When I was cleared to play sports in late April, it was only a few weeks before the start of that season. I loved the hell out of everything I played that summer. I felt so fortunate just to be back out there playing again. When we won the league title with a lineup of 4 guys and 6 girls against the other team's normal lineup of 6 guys and 4 girls, boy was that sweet. We had a core of solid players and people who I knew and liked. Unfortunately people moved away, started their own teams or simply joined another team and after that fun season everything started to go downhill. When we came back last year there was a whole new team of idiots, perverts, flaky females and only a couple of us left from that title team. This year we replaced all the misfits with strangers who just weren't a lot of fun to play with.
Maybe kickball spoiled me. I'm just having too much fun out there.
I don't want to say for certain that I am retired for good from softball but unless I run into a really fun team one of these days, I'm thinking I don't need to play any more. Here's hoping football is still a blast when that starts in a few weeks otherwise all this retiring may be contagious.
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