Before anyone gets too concerned I haven’t left facebook or any other site. I was just really pissed off this morning and was thinking of taking a break from being online for a while. So I’m back with new parts and no longer broken. I also didn’t want to post status messages while being so angry. I want to keep my page sunny, silly and true for the most part and I also don’t think anyone wants to hear me whine about my girl troubles.
The short story is I met someone online somewhat recently and we had been talking and things were going very well. I looked forward to getting new messages from her and they didn’t disappoint. She was a divorcee which doesn’t bother me one bit. She told me she was divorced a few years ago and I didn’t ask about it because quite frankly, I didn’t care about her past that much. I don’t care about anyone’s past that much. I try not to judge. I mean, I don’t know what it’s like to be in her shoes.
Right on the verge of our first official date and meeting I find out she is still married to this guy and that she is estranged but still has strong feelings for this person, who by the way cheated on her on several occasions. Are you freaking kidding me?!?
I don’t care about a person’s flaws; is your skin a little wrinkly? Do you have acne problems? Are you shy? Do you have cellulite? Do you have a lot of debt? Do you bite your nails? I don’t care about any of those things if I like you and I was starting to like this woman. BUT if you prove to be dishonest, especially on that level, there is no acceptance on my part. From that point on, we’re done, and you no longer exist in my world. I never forget. Don’t cross me.
Therein lies the trouble with online dating. You can write anything you want to someone. You never know who the person on the other keyboard is. So when I found out I got so angry that I didn’t want to date or even communicate with people online for a long time but meditation and reading has cooled my jets and I am back to the moment.
I just hate being lied to by someone who claims to care about me. We spoke online at length recently and all the while she lied and kept the lies going. Why not just tell me your situation from the beginning? I want to pull back from dating for a little bit because I have been getting my hopes up a lot in the past few months and every time I have gotten my hopes up, they’ve been crushed through dishonesty, cruelty and unrequited feelings. I need a break from women. There are only so many times a sensitive INFJ personality like me can be crushed.
I’m going to continue to work on myself and enjoy life while trying to ignore the loneliness and emotional pain that has been building.
As for the person I am no longer speaking with, It’s her loss. Because she couldn’t tell me the truth she’s not going to get the awesome sincerity, kindness, sweetness, caring, love, generosity, companionship, laughter, loyalty, thoughtfulness, wit, honor, compassion, honesty, passion, intensity and sex that being involved with me brings.
Whatever…
“Women cannot complain about men anymore until they start getting better taste in them” -Bill Maher
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ReplyDeleteYou can lie in a bar or a grocery store too. The only thing that you can lie about online that you can't do elsewhere is about what your physical appearance. Liars will lie and they can be found anywhere. Sorry things didn't work out.
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