Ever wonder where the time goes? Today I found myself digging through some boxes of “junk” that I stashed in my closet while looking for a particular CD that wasn’t with all my other CDs. Unfortunately I couldn’t find it but what I did find were a bunch of memories that took me anywhere from 2 years ago all the way back to the 80’s. I looked at choices and tried to remember why I made them and what could have been different if I hadn’t decided the way I did. I looked at ideas and tried to remember what caused them and how far I took them. As it turned out I spent nearly 2 hours looking through 3 boxes. Too many items caused me to stop and reflect and there were many items in particular that I had to stop and reminisce about for long periods of time. Things like:
-My dad’s watch – When I was a little person my dad had this watch that had gold plating or some serious gold in it. He wanted me to have it someday but never quite gave it to me. There were so many times where we’d be broke and food was hard to come by but he would never sell that watch because he was going to give it to me someday. He was very prideful and stubborn, two things that he certainly passed on to me, lol. After he passed I looked for and found the watch and I’ve had it ever since.
-A WBNY “$2 Ho Show” Folder – Back when I was a DJ at WBNY one of the shows I did (and maybe the most infamous one) was the $2 Ho Show. I served as the Pimp of the Airwaves and made all of you my listenin’ hoes as “prostitution of the airwaves” was legal. The show featured funk songs mostly but also had a little disco, soul, and oldschool rap. The folder contained playlists from 1998 I believe, plus charts of which tracks I played by certain artists (so I didn’t play the same tracks each week), scripts for some commercials I wrote and produced, notes on songs, articles, and a reader which was basically a piece of paper which contained important catch phrases, various station IDs and other things I would read off during a show or whenever I got stuck on a break. Man, looking through all that stuff made me feel good. I had the silliest little catchphrases. “Don’t make me cut you!” I often said that on the air but I never meant it. I think the hoes knew. The Pimp was a character I loved to play. My pimp was a lover not a fighter and was more likely to channel Tina Turner than Ike Turner although I did create and perfect the diagonal bitchslap. Again, idle threats. I never gave anyone a diagonal bitchslap. Looking back at all the work I did on this show reminds me that even radio pimpin ain’t easy.
-A “Slow Jams” 90 minute mixtape – In the late 80’s I was coming out of my hair metal phase and Poison, Bon Jovi and Def Leppard couldn’t cut it anymore. I know, I know. I started to get back into rap and that meant Tribe Called Quest, Public Enemy, De La Soul, the Beasties and others. Supplementing that was a growing love for contemporary R&B and the growing sound of New Jack Swing. This was when the soul music was getting suggestive but it wasn’t as full blown graphic like it would be in the later 90’s. This mixtape might have been from around 92, 93 or so.
It was the jam. It had Guy’s Let’s Chill, Babyface’s Whip Appeal, Jodeci’s Forever My Lady, Mint Condition’s Pretty Brown Eyes, New Edition, Keith Sweat, R. Kelly, Tony Toni Tone, Johnny Gill, Tevin Campbell and who knows what else. I’ve always had a thing for good slow jams even if at times I was afraid to admit it.
When I was growing up I foolishly thought I could only be into one thing at a time. That’s why I was constantly switching what one thing I was into almost every year. I think it was me telling me I could like more than one thing but I was young and as I said, foolish. I didn’t quite get the message for a long time. I had the Michael Jackson phase, the New Wave phase, the Rap/Breakdancing phase, the MTV phase, the closely associated hair metal phase, the R&B phase, Grunge, Gangsta Rap, Indie Rock, Etc. At some point in my twenties and around the mid-90’s it came to me, clear as day that I could like everything I wanted. I didn’t have to settle. I didn’t have to choose. Who cares what people think?!?
So this is why I like oldschool, hip hop, abstract, underground, gangsta and intelligent rap. I like new wave, post punk, skate punk, punk rock, indie rock, indie pop, shoegazer, alt-country, brit pop, trip hop, downbeat, funk, krunk, disco, soul, neo-soul, hard rock, adult alternative, soft rock, classic rock, classic pop, electronica, electro-clash, riot grrl, geek rock, math rock, garage rock, oldschool country, folk, classical music, opera, jazz, blues, bebop, beat box, a cappella, freedom rock, dance rock, atmospheric and reggae music. I hope I didn’t forget anything, lol.
-Lastly I saw a yearbook from high school. Goodness I spent a while flipping through it. I saw pictures of friends, girls I dated, people I hated and people who had me scratching my head trying to remember who they were. One thing I got a little caught up on with some of the girls I dated. I found 5 of them in there. It never went too long or too far with any of them and I’m the one who usually broke it off.
Like any teen boy I wanted to get it on with any female with a big butt and a smile and I think about all the times I could have but didn’t do it. Of the 5 girls I dated back in school I had the opportunity to sleep with at least 3 of them. I remember times at a friend’s house where his mom worked overnights and we’d have get-togethers there and I would be alone in a room with one and I could have done any naughty thing I wanted to. Something always stopped me though. At the time I thought it was shyness but as I got older I realized it was far more than that.
I was really picky. It’s something that still applies today. Back then, I didn’t know what I wanted but I knew what I didn’t want. It’s probably why I led them on back then… unlike these days when I can usually make up my mind about someone in a shirt period of time, back then it took me weeks to figure it out. I wanted to have a girlfriend but not like them. 3 of the 5 girls I mentioned actually got pregnant with the next guy they hooked up with after I passed on them. That scared the hell out of me when I thought about it. That could have been me, a father at 16 or 17. That certainly would have put my life on a different path. After thinking and reflecting on those times I feel lucky and proud I had some self control and certain standards whether I knew it or not.
It made me think about now. How I’m still very selective, not just with people I would date but with friends, acquaintances and more. I guess that’s what these memories in these boxes will do. They’ll make me think of the past, the good times and bad, and then my mind will come to now. I think about the choices I’ve made and how I’ve gotten to where I am. Sure I have some regrets but I would hardly change a thing. Actually it’s probably silly to even think about changing the past because I can’t. Time can give me memories but time won’t give me time.
No comments:
Post a Comment