I was working on this during the first week of January and a funny thing happened. I got sidetracked, forgot about this and it sat in a desktop folder waiting to be finished. Recently someone brought up something that led me back to this unfinished work and I finished it. This is just personal sillyness and it's very long so I wouldn't read this if I were you unless you are in detention, stuck at work or want to earn some brownie points and by brownie points I mean I'll give you a brownie if you read it.
2009- The Year in Review
This is a fun project for me. Over the next several thousand words I am going to recap my 2009. I confess I am doing it for 2 reasons and both are them are pretty much for me alone. The first is to reflect on the past year. I want to relive the joy, savor the good and learn from the mistakes. I want to cherish all of it for better or worse before I let it go. Secondly I want to document it in writing for reference. I’ll come back to it a few years down the road and be reminded of people, places, things, ideas and emotions. Maybe I’ll read it in a few years and get a warm fuzzy feeling inside. One can only hope.
I compiled all this from previous blogs, journal entries, random scribblings and memory of course. Highlights of the past year:
January 09:
-Lawsuit – The biggest thing that happened to me in January 09 was the conclusion of my lingering lawsuit against the woman who ran me over with her car in December 07. At this point my injuries had healed with the exception of the psychological damage and deep paranoia which I still carry whenever I have to cross at a busy intersection. If you are interested in what happened that dreadful day you can look back in my blogs/notes on here and you can read all about it.
This moment when it was finally over and all I had left to do was sign paperwork at my lawyer’s office was finally when I felt some measure of closure. I distinctly remember my lawyer’s assistant who seemed just a little disappointed that I was able to rehab my physical injuries completely and that even my partially torn knee ligament healed. It closed the door to bigger mounds of cash. That’s okay though, I prefer having full use of my legs.
-Blades of Fury – One of the more enjoyable moments of this month was when I went to the Pepsi Center and donned the ice skates after being told only a year earlier that I would probably not be able to ice skate any more. After going around a few times and starting to feel confident in my knee my thoughts shifted from wondering if I would hold up to wondering if I would crash into someone… just like old times! I began to wonder if I would be better off not skating… not so much for my well being or my knee but as far as public safety goes. That was definite progress. Let’s just say I’m not Brian Boitano out there.
-1st Date – I went out on a date with a pretty social worker for my first date of the year. She had an everyday natural kind of pretty which is my favorite kind. If you have to put on a ton of makeup and other products to be and to feel pretty, then I probably wouldn’t be interested. Just be yourself baby. I want someone who is pretty in real, everyday life. When she’s dishelved and thinks she looks terrible and I’m licking my lips… that kind of pretty. Anyway, she was all of that and we talked for 2 hours until the place kicked us out because they were closing. Historically, I’ve always taken that as a good sign, when you are talking with someone and it’s going so well that you lose track of time and find yourselves being booted out of the place. Unfortunately though, we never went out again.
-Street poet – I went to a poetry reading open mic finally ready to read one of my pieces in front of a crowd for the first time. Unfortunately something happened on my way to the stage. It turned out that this was going to be the last poetry gig at the venue and the host booked the entire night in advance with friends and regulars to read instead. There would be no open mic for me and no poetry reading debut. Instead, in front of 3 people on the corner of Allen and College I read/performed my piece. I think it received favorable reviews. With both of my favorite open mic poetry readings shutting down around this time, my desire to both write and read performance pieces has waned although I still possess a “special” folder which contains at least a dozen finished pieces which may never see the light of day and may never be performed in front of people again which makes me a little sad.
-Sledding Fury – In January I had the opportunity to do something I hadn’t done since I was a teenager when I met a handful of friends over at Chestnut Ridge for hardcore sledding. A lot of things had changed since I went sledding last. The first was that I was a lot bigger than I was then. The second was that nowadays I tend to feel the little aches and pains unlike when I was a kid when only really big injuries hurt. The third was that I had never sledded down a “real” hill. As it turned out I only went down the hill one time. Why only one time? Well perhaps you should refer to my blog from this time period called “Eddie and the Ice Wall”.
February 09:
-Paid in Full – This was one of my highlights of the year. With a few clicks of my mouse I wiped out the rest of the student loan debt I had from back in 2001. When I was laying out my finances for the next month it really sunk in that I didn’t have to send a payment any longer. Incurring more student loan debt is one of the primary detractors for resuming my higher priced education.
-Tubular Tubing – Though not quite the debacle my sledding trip turned out to be I was able to make a trip out to Colden and Kissing Bridge to check out the Colden Tubing Company. The chutes for the tube are steep and they actually have lights telling everyone next in line on top of the hill to go. Due to my fear of heights I probably dug my feet into the ground to brake a little more than most. The bright side was I faced a fear, did it numerous times and achieved a lifelong dream of riding an inner tube face first and face down a slippery ice hill.
-Do you Really Want to Hurt Me - Another fear I have/had is singing in public. I’m afraid I don’t have the greatest singing voice and I probably go flat sometimes but I discovered a Karaoke place where you can rent a little room with your friends and sing only in front of people you know. This enabled me to finally grab the mic and bust out some Culture Club, Spandau Ballet, Billy Joel, Michael Jackson, and well you get the idea. What can I say? I’m a Karma Chameleon, I come and go.
-Slam Dunk - February also proved to be the end of my pickup basketball career. It had been coming for a few years as it became tougher and tougher to play ball with today’s youth. It’s not that my skills weren’t good enough it was just all the trash talking, arguing, and hacking. For those who don’t know, hacking is a slang term for people who are recklessly physical. It’s like no one knows how to play defense anymore. Every time I’d get the ball in the post someone was going to club me in the head or somewhere else on my body. When they repeatedly do this ballers like me refer to them as hacks. The last straw occurred when I began going with a friend or two to play with these older guys. We thought the atmosphere was more mature and less annoying but all that ended when a guy took out his frustration on me physically and then became even more upset when I had the nerve to object to it. Basically he clubbed me in the face because someone else clubbed him in the face a minute earlier. What the hell is that? That guy almost pushed me into a fight and that’s when I decided I didn’t need to play competitively any longer. Don’t get me wrong, if I get the chance to shoot some hoops I will still do it but b-ball is no longer a regularly scheduled part of my life because other people ruined it for me. The problem is that to play the game you need other people.
March 09:
-2 Wheels - I was bikeless for almost a year at this point which might have been a record for me. Finally, I broke down and purchased a bike but this time I avoided the Schwinn shuffle I would make every year or every other year when I would just go to Target and get the latest Schwinn model for $125-$150. This time I thought I would splurge and sample the good life of bike. I went to a real bike shop and tried out several bikes and found one adjusted perfectly to my size and style. I bought a Diamondback comfort bike for several hundred dollars and when I rode it home that day it was like nothing I had ever experienced. To paraphrase Ferris Bueller, if you have the means I highly recommend it or something like it. It’s in the closet for the winter but I can’t wait to break it out in March or April.
-Does Not Compute - Another new toy I acquired was my new PC. My old one suddenly became very moody and then downright mean. Thankfully past computer troubles helped to make this one of the easiest transitions I’ve ever made from one system to the next. Because there have been times where when a computer died, I lost everything. I think that happened in 2002. This time I had nearly every important thing backed up on an external hard drive so I lost very little. Yay technology!
-Every Breath I Take – I went to the doctor with what I thought was bronchitis for the 6th or 7th time and the diagnosis came back a little different than I expected. The doctor said I had a reactive airway, meaning that normally I’m fine but sometimes when in the presence of respiratory irritants like dust, mold, smoke and worse my airway gets a little ornery and constricts a little giving me bronchitis like symptoms. A few weeks prior to seeing the doctor I cleaned a smidge of mold from one corner of a wall in my apartment. So if you have any mold, cigarette smoke or dust you are looking to get rid of, don’t look at me.
April 09:
-Go Deep! – Coming off of our coed football title in the fall we were back to try to repeat. There were some big changes though. Our team split in half. We were now 2 separate teams and we had to make up for the loss of talent and depth by bringing in new players to our side. Bringing in new players is always tough because they have to learn the nuances of the league and how the games are played plus they have to get comfortable going out there and making plays. Not everyone can do that. Surprisingly the newer players contributed and our core players were as good as usual so we found our way back to the title game looking for our 2nd title in a row. Unfortunately it rained a lot during the game and the field was soup negating our speed advantage. I caught a beautiful sliding touchdown and grabbed an interception in the 1st half and we thought we were on our way but 2 interceptions by our quarterback and some bad luck put us behind by 5 points with 5 minutes left. I was inserted to play quarterback at this point. Both the team and the ball were wet and muddy and the momentum had swung the other team’s way. The first few passes on the drive were dropped and I felt the season slipping away but somehow we completed the next 3 including a beautiful 20 yarder to the back corner of the endzone for the touchdown and the lead. The only problem was that the other team still had about 2 minutes left to answer and unfortunately with about 14 seconds left they did and won the title. It was a hell of a game though and despite not winning the title, it felt like a pretty good season.
-Dead Air/Ed Air – Late April marks one of my favorite times of year as I got to once again participate in WBNY’s Alumni weekend and revisit my former radio career as Crazy Eddie. Considering I only do one show a year and I worry about it that whole week, I really feel good about my performance last April. I babbled a bit and maybe even went off on a rant or two but for the most part I didn’t botch anything, all the music flowed to my liking and I had a lot of fun! I have a tape of the show, but I have not transferred it to my computer yet to post somewhere for all to listen. One of these days I will. I can’t wait for this year’s show which is only about a month away. Get ready!
May 09:
-Meeting Johanna – My friend Johanna came to town in early May and stayed with me for a week. She had never been to Buffalo before and I had never had a houseguest before so it was a very educational experience all around. We did have a lot of fun though, taking 2 hour walks to get burritos, going to see Roller Derby, watching a bunch of movies, and chatting about life and other things. It was such a pleasant time. Plus she cleaned up after herself nicely. Unfortunately the only regret I have is that we didn’t take a picture together which would have been really cool.
-Play Ball! – During the spring and summer I was on 3 softball teams. I was first tried out at shortstop but my weight gain this year made it increasingly hard to make the dynamic plays I am capable of so after one particularly error filled game I settled back into my home position of first base. Defensively I feel like I get better at first each year. I mean I can do the split to snag a mildly errant throw but I’ve been getting better and better at digging balls out of the dirt on a hop or two and that’s really gratifying. My hitting was the worst it’s been in a while though and that needs to get fixed this spring!
-You killed my father, prepare to die - The city of Buffalo and Shea’s have a little program going on where they’d show a classic children’s movie at Shea’s. It was/is called Free Family Film Series and has been going on for 20 years. Movies included last spring were The Goonies, Back to The Future and one of my all time favorites, The Princess Bride. When I was little my father never took me to the movies mostly because of his self-consciousness over his emphysema and the coughing fits that came with it on occasion. So I had never seen The Princess Bride on the big screen until I saw it at Shea’s. It was great to see it with a thousand kids in attendance and to take in their reactions to things. They would shriek and cheer and go bananas when a good guy bested a bad guy… it was very cool. It almost brought me back to that age. Plus I was even THAT GUY because I wore my Princess Bride t-shirt to the show. I felt a little of that catty womanly stereotype when I discovered 2 other guys in attendance had the same mail order shirt. The nerve of them! I spent most of the intermission plotting ways to get rid of them, but with so many people around getting rid of them would be utterly and in all ways inconceivable.
Jun. 09:
-Shout! - Part of the fun of playing in the football league I play in is that often times we get to play playoff games at Ralph Wilson Stadium. We played our first round playoff game there and won something like 26-6. We could see replays up on the scoreboard and there was music pumping throughout the stadium during the games. Plus the field there is so soft and nice. It’s fake grass but boy is it nice. I could have slept right there in the end zone if it wasn’t for the teams needing it for their games. I hope we get to go back this spring.
-Gay bingo – I went to bingo for the first time but that wasn’t enough of a novelty for me so I went with a bunch of friends to Buffalo Gay Bingo. Its bingo but it’s dressed up into a campy, fun bingo experience. There are many reactions we had to learn for certain numbers and if someone won we got to call them bitches. Plus most of the proceeds went to some very good causes regarding HIV or AIDS treatment locally. They have one every month near the Elmwood Avenue area and each month is a different dress up theme. I didn’t dress up for the one I went to but that didn’t matter because some guy gave me his phone number within 15 minutes of getting there. In case you are wondering, no I didn’t call him. It was very flattering and strange for me at the same time but I likes the womens too much.
-Date night - My next date of 2009 occurred during June. She was an interesting woman who came from tragic circumstances. I won’t get into it too much here but while it was a pleasant conversation it didn’t work out. I don’t think she wanted to date someone so silly and I didn’t like her lack of a sense of humor which is one of my big 3. If a female has a good sense of humor, is nice and is down to earth she’s got a chance with me but if any of those things are missing it’s really tough for me to look past them. It doesn’t even matter how pretty she is at that point. Like I said though, she wasn’t into me so it was no big loss and I don’t think anyone was hurt. It was nice to meet a new person and to slightly tap into a new perspective on things. Remember kids, we don’t learn anything from people who are just like us.
Jul. 09:
-4th of July – I spent the 4th of July in South Buffalo at a friend’s house having a few drinks, laughing and playing street football at 12:30 in the morning. It was a really good time with several drunken characters around to entertain everyone. The highlight of the evening was about 3 blocks away this guy, who I’m told does it every year, put on his own fireworks display which rivaled some of the fireworks shows I’ve seen at baseball games and other large scale events. The great part was that we walked a block over and we were so close to it that we could hear every pop and crackle with great clarity. With shorts on I must have been bitten a few dozen times by mosquitoes as we stood in the calf high grass watching the 10-15 minute show but it was worth it. Needless to say if I’m not doing something big this year I’d like to go back and see this show again!
- Old Fort Niagara – Speaking of fireworks I had the great honor to go to Old Fort Niagara to see a large scale reenactment of the war between France and England that occurred 250 years ago at that fort. There were thousands of people dressed as soldiers and we would go from place to place around the fort to see the individual battles fought all over again. The cannons were so loud and awesome. The soldiers came in all shapes and sizes with some wearing the green of Ireland, the kilts of Scotland and others were dressed as American Indians who inhabited the area and aided one or both sides. The picnic areas and fields around the fort were transformed into little tents and huts selling food and other items that were reflective of the period. Thankfully there was also a nice modern burger tent or two as well... sorry weird jerky like substance. The Fort is a beautiful piece of local history and it’s right on Lake Ontario which adds to the beauty. On a clear day you can see the skyline of Toronto in the distance. Check it out sometime, especially if you are a history buff.
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-The Italian Festival – I don’t have a lot to mention about the festival that’s not food related. I had great Italian Sausage sandwiches with peppers and onions. I tried a fried Twinkie which is very weird and probably very bad for you too and I remembered why I don’t care for cannolis. Unfortunately it took me to eat one to jog my memory. On the very bright side, it’s the best Italian sausage sandwich I get to eat all year so I can’t for this year’s festival.
Aug. 09:
-35! - I celebrated my 35th birthday in August and I wonder if that’s why I did so many memorable things that month. I took the day off from work which I rarely ever do and I went with a friend down to Tift Farm nature preserve. We walked all over the beautiful natural landscape and I took plenty of pictures which are in one of my folders on facebook. It was serene and beautiful. I ended up going back to the same place that night for a night walk with tour guides and a much larger group of people. Actually I believe they referred to it as a midnight stroll. I’ve had wilder birthdays but this one was memorable for how tranquil it was.
-The Big Red Ball - In the fall of 2008 I was on an indoor kickball team and we won the league championship. I don’t know how we did it, but we did. In early August I joined up with a bunch of people I hardly knew or didn’t know at all to play on an outdoor team for the first time. I was told that the team wasn’t too good and that it wouldn’t be too competitive and I was thrilled to hear it. After all the other sports I’ve played in recent years it would be nice for a change if whatever happens out there didn’t mean so much. I believe we ended up winning only one game but I had fun every time we played… so much fun in fact that I am playing again when it starts up in May. Plus I am now friends with nearly everyone who played on the team which is very cool. I’ve played on other teams where when the season ends and we go our separate ways but maybe that’s why I had so much fun playing on this team and less fun playing on those other ones… good peeps.
-Party like its 1901 – On a weekend morning in August I went on a Pan American Exposition walk courtesy of the Buffalo Historical Society. At the time I was already a big fan of studying the proud history of this city and going on this walk only strengthened my desire to learn. We walked around the area just above Hoyt Lake and with the aid of maps and pictures we could see exactly where many of the important buildings, exhibits and decorations stood. It was so fascinating to me. If they offer the walk again this spring/summer, I’m going.
-At the Elmwood Festival of the Arts I drank many Pina Coladas out of a large faux coconut looking container while wearing a few Hawaiian Leis. Many people saw me doing this and many females giggled and/or smiled at me. I don’t have more to add here other than to say: hey ladies, I still have the coconut.
-Bust a Move – At the end of the month I checked out the The Art of Hip Hop 4, an annual weekend devoted to the history and love of hip hop music and culture. Nowadays hip hop inhabits the mainstream but it wasn’t always that way. At many places over that weekend there were shows, MC battles, B-Boy breakdancing battles and art. I caught the breakdancing battle at the Albright Knox and it went on for over half an hour. There were little kids, big, small, males, females and it was amazing. The best dancers were doing things I haven’t seen since I saw Breakin 2: Electric Boogaloo. The environment was positive and fun, the way hip hop used to be before all the guns, bitches and money. I’ll definitely go back this summer. Peace in the Middle East ya’ll.
Sept. 09:
-Pigskins! – My team football season was starting up again and after the previous 2 seasons (a division title and a loss in the title game) our expectations were very high. I probably blogged enough about the ups and downs of the season already so I’ll spare us from that here. The bottom line is for the season, in pretty much 8 full games I threw 34 TDs and 11 Ints, but the 3 picks I threw in the 2nd half of our first round playoff game which we lost and which caused our season to be over is something I haven’t forgotten nor am okay with. Yes that’s my competitive side coming through. Let’s just say I can’t wait for spring to kick some a$$.
- 3rd Date – I went on my third and last date of 2009. This time I met this female I met online for coffee and we eventually sat in Bidwell Park and chatted. At first I was intrigued. She seemed bright, engaging and witty but eventually I began to lose interest. It was something in the way she talked. I got the sense she was into drama and my spider sense was tingling about whether or not she was an honest person. For the record I hate drama. I try to live a simple life. Part of what makes my life a simple one is not to get too worked up on ridiculous things and not to care about other people’s affairs. To each their own. I dunno, I just had bad vibes about her and I had to trust my instincts. Some of my friends get on me about being too picky but I don’t believe in settling when it comes to people, friends or otherwise. By the end of the date I got the sense she didn’t like me that much so once again it seemed like another thanks but no thanks moment. Going 0 for 3 for the year would have made me feel really awful a few years back but I have been predominantly single for so long that the comfort level I have with the loner lifestyle is very high. Perhaps it feeds into my selectiveness but I would rather be comfortably alone than with someone who makes me anything less than happy.
Oct. 09:
-October was music month for me as I went to 2 great concerts. The first was a real treat. It was Ben Folds at Kleinhans Music Hall supported by the B.P.O. I went with a friend of mine and we wandered around because he was looking for a place to get a beer and suddenly the music started. We quickly made our way to our seats, or at least I did and there he was. Ben Folds was playing a majestic piano and the whole Buffalo Philharmonic Orchestra was playing with him. It made me think that if there were a soundtrack to heaven, it would sound like that. The BPO added depth and emotion to already emotionally charged songs. I believe when I wrote about it I called it one of the 5 best shows I’ve ever seen and I stand behind that now that I am months away from it.
-Later in the month I finally went to Babeville for the 1st time to see Andrew Bird and St. Vincent. I am a big Andrew Bird fan and that’s what got me out to the show but when I left at the end I was nearly as big a fan of St. Vincent. Both put on great shows and might have been the best double bill I’ve seen since Beck and Cibo Matto back in the mid-90’s. Also the venue is intimate and beautiful. It’s perfect for bands that sound like these. The acoustics are usually fantastic in churches and this former church was no exception. If you have a chance to see an acoustic, folky, or even indie rock or pop bands at Babeville it’s definitely worth it and will most likely sound great.
Nov. 09:
-November was a transitional month. I began to wind down and I stopped going out and doing a lot of things. I remember seeing a show at Mohawk Place the day before Thanksgiving. I remember my turkey cooking debacle on Thanksgiving day. I don’t remember much else. I saw the leaves crumbling on the ground and I saw my breath in the air each morning and my energy levels began to sink like can do this time of year. I don’t feel bad about drawing it back in a bit for a few months because I usually burst when spring comes back on the scene. It’s kind of like a life balance.
Dec. 09:
-The last month of the year started terribly but ended well. Early in December I had the misfortune of finding out online that one of my sisters had died. I felt a level of guilt and remorse because I had not spoken to her in a long time but talking and spending time with family in the time afterwards really helped to make me feel better. I think I cried every day that week.
-You often hear people say that family and friends are very important. There’s a reason why people say it… it’s true. Whenever I’m hurting I can bounce back a lot quicker if I have someone to lean on. I bet a lot of you can say that too. This past year I reconnected and began to get closer with a lot of family that I hadn’t seen or spoken to very much for many years while the family I was closest to, my mom and younger sister, slowly drifted away from me. What a strange year.
-One last highlight of the year was what has become a new holiday tradition for me. For the 2nd year in a row I went to the Screening Room to see their annual Xmas double feature: It’s a Wonderful Life and the 1951 version of A Christmas Carol starring the great actor Alistair Sim. Both times I’ve gone to this I come out feeling like a million bucks and grateful for all of life’s blessings. I feel kind of like Jimmy Stewart at the end.
Like any year 2009 featured a lot of highs, lows and memories that will stay me forever. To summarize it all down to one sentence I’d say It’s a Wonderful Life.
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
Tuesday, March 16, 2010
Coming back to life (3-15-10)
I’m back to the grind today after a very full and awesome weekend. It started off on Friday and going to ComedySportz which is just 2-3 hours of pure fun every time I get to see it. On Saturday I had to work a half day but then I spent a large chunk of the evening at a semi-surprise party for my older sister. I had the chance to meet one of my little nephews I had not yet met and it’s always nice to see and chat with family. Plus there was the Sabres game on a HD-TV and yummy food to make a good time even better.
On Sunday I went to the St. Patrick’s Day parade and had more fun than I expected. Usually large parties or gatherings are not my thing but I was with a group of people I knew which always helps and it was a good even mixture of guys and several attractive ladies in the group so I can’t argue with that. I saw some incredibly drunk people and several times I locked eyes with cute but very drunk females in a few bars and although naughty thoughts entered my mind a few times, I maintained a gentlemanly disposition throughout. There were so many trashed females who were throwing themselves at guys who were all too happy to oblige. I felt sympathy for some of them. Once upon a time I couldn’t moderate my drinking so I guess I could relate and that generated the sympathetic feelings. I’m sure many of the people I saw stumbling around yesterday are paying for it today.
As those of you who know me might have guessed I didn’t drink too much, I think it was 3 beers in 5 hours so I wasn’t drunk. Towards the end of the day out nearly everyone in my group was pretty hammered except for one person who I ended up having the most fun talking to.
It was probably the first time I went out to a bar since November so maybe my tolerance to the chaotic atmosphere was extra high since I hadn’t been to one in a while but having a good time with cool people helps me to forget about all the idiots and rudeness going on all around me which usually bothers me and consumes my thoughts when I am in those types of places.
For someone who has hardly ventured out much the past few months this weekend was a much needed and greatly anticipated wake up call. I think hibernation is officially over. We are only days away from the actual beginning of spring and my energy levels have really kicked up a few notches the past 2 weeks.
The warmer weather is surely an important factor and the impending arrival of my favorite season is another. In spring many things are reborn and it’s all around us. We cannot escape the renewed world under our feet and out as far as our eyes can see. I feel like I am a part of it. I feel like I shed my winter blues and my winter skin and I am revitalized and ready to go out to do bazillion things.
Suddenly I want to go out and see shows. Suddenly I want to go out and hang with friends. Suddenly I want to explore and I most definitely want to quote Prince and play in the sunshine. Now my hunger for playing sports, seeing music, art, culture, shows, plays, other places and other faces is growing and will be nearly insatiable before too long.
I’ve already been out on my bike for the better part of 2 weeks and it feels wonderful. I feel alive again. I know that pales in comparison to skydiving, rock climbing, wrestling bears and extreme jello walking in terms of feeling alive but for me riding a bike in traffic feels pretty dangerous. I’m easy. I don’t need much.
On a couple of the warm days I’ll ride without a hat or any kind of headgear and let the wind blow through my hair and man does that feel good. I think I am trying to say I love to ride my bike and to be able to do that once again makes me a happy guy. With all this revitalization in a strange way I feel like I’ve somehow come back to life.
The positive energy of now mixing with the rush of anticipation of what’s to come has me in a tizzy. I am jumping up and down in place thinking about needing to wear sunblock again. I can’t wait to hear the wind whip through the leaves. I can’t wait for the Sabres to rip through the Leafs… again. All this energy and a desire to go in 5 directions at once… I love it.
As far as work goes I’m going to need all this extra energy. Our staff is moving down the street one block to one of our other buildings. When you have 30,000+ items in your inventory, that’s quite a job. Add in the fact that we are expected to complete the move in 6 weeks and we have the added task of needing to help the business in the building we are moving to. We have to help them turn it around but the decks are really stacked against us. They have a brutal location, little to no promotion, an ancient store space, a budget the size of a caterpillar and an owner who is out of touch. We’ve done our own thing for 10 years or more and have had some great success but now we’re supposed to turn them around and also restart our own thing while we are performing that minor miracle. So yeah, I don’t know if I’ll still be working with this company a few months from now or if there will be a company in a few months but on the bright side if these are the last few weeks of what was a good long nearly 7 year run for me, at least it will be especially stressful, brutal and ridiculous. That’s sarcasm by the way.
On the real bright side I have so many cool things coming up in the next few weeks. Let’s see I am going to see E.T. for FREE at Sheas on Sunday (I’ve never seen E.T.!), I am going to see improv at Sugar City. I am going to Comedysportz again this weekend and a Muppet Show marathon in a few weeks. I am going to see an operatic adaptation of “Hamlet” at the Live at the Met series shown in Regal theaters here in Buffalo. I am going to get delicious pierogies at the Broadway Market one of these weekends very soon. I may go to see Roller Derby on the 27th and I’m still going to the Tuesday night UB film seminar movie series at the Market Arcade until it ends in mid-April. If any of these things sound interesting to you, feel free to ask me about them and I’ll give you the 411… whether you wish to join me or not.
In the I need to get off my butt and start jogging again department my coed football league starts up on April 3rd which is only 3 weeks away. We won the title in the fall 2008 session but in spring 2009 and fall 2009 we lost in the playoffs, both times to the same team and both times we had swept them in the regular season only to lose to them in the postseason. I’m trying to switch gears this season from quarterback to receiver which is my preferred position. I run really good routes and I catch nearly everything but with my weight being so high it reduces my speed and stamina. That’s why I am trying to slim down. I want to get my burst back. With my size and skill if I can drop 30 pounds this spring I can become a very dangerous weapon on the field. Things are going well in that regard as I’ve lost about 5 pounds so far in March.
Also coming up in about a month is the annual 91.3fm WBNY Alumni weekend. This is where I go back to Buffalo State and do a radio show and hope the equipment hasn’t changed much from the year before. I already have a few hundred songs I’m considering for the show and with a 2-hour shift and a few mic breaks mixed in I think I may have time for about 25-30 songs. So an elimination process will be happening soon. When I get a timeslot I will post it on here and let everyone and their cats know about it. I’ve had the Friday night 10pm to midnight slot for 5 years running so I hope to get that one again.
Then in May we’re talking about the returns of the kickball team and softball team(s)! I can’t wait to sweat and hustle and laugh with everyone. I probably say this every year but this spring is going to be great! With so many things going on and the right mix in the air my internal flame has been reignited. I’ve gone from simmer to high flame. Here’s to fires being lit under all of us. I hope the spring brings all of you many things to look forward to.
On Sunday I went to the St. Patrick’s Day parade and had more fun than I expected. Usually large parties or gatherings are not my thing but I was with a group of people I knew which always helps and it was a good even mixture of guys and several attractive ladies in the group so I can’t argue with that. I saw some incredibly drunk people and several times I locked eyes with cute but very drunk females in a few bars and although naughty thoughts entered my mind a few times, I maintained a gentlemanly disposition throughout. There were so many trashed females who were throwing themselves at guys who were all too happy to oblige. I felt sympathy for some of them. Once upon a time I couldn’t moderate my drinking so I guess I could relate and that generated the sympathetic feelings. I’m sure many of the people I saw stumbling around yesterday are paying for it today.
As those of you who know me might have guessed I didn’t drink too much, I think it was 3 beers in 5 hours so I wasn’t drunk. Towards the end of the day out nearly everyone in my group was pretty hammered except for one person who I ended up having the most fun talking to.
It was probably the first time I went out to a bar since November so maybe my tolerance to the chaotic atmosphere was extra high since I hadn’t been to one in a while but having a good time with cool people helps me to forget about all the idiots and rudeness going on all around me which usually bothers me and consumes my thoughts when I am in those types of places.
For someone who has hardly ventured out much the past few months this weekend was a much needed and greatly anticipated wake up call. I think hibernation is officially over. We are only days away from the actual beginning of spring and my energy levels have really kicked up a few notches the past 2 weeks.
The warmer weather is surely an important factor and the impending arrival of my favorite season is another. In spring many things are reborn and it’s all around us. We cannot escape the renewed world under our feet and out as far as our eyes can see. I feel like I am a part of it. I feel like I shed my winter blues and my winter skin and I am revitalized and ready to go out to do bazillion things.
Suddenly I want to go out and see shows. Suddenly I want to go out and hang with friends. Suddenly I want to explore and I most definitely want to quote Prince and play in the sunshine. Now my hunger for playing sports, seeing music, art, culture, shows, plays, other places and other faces is growing and will be nearly insatiable before too long.
I’ve already been out on my bike for the better part of 2 weeks and it feels wonderful. I feel alive again. I know that pales in comparison to skydiving, rock climbing, wrestling bears and extreme jello walking in terms of feeling alive but for me riding a bike in traffic feels pretty dangerous. I’m easy. I don’t need much.
On a couple of the warm days I’ll ride without a hat or any kind of headgear and let the wind blow through my hair and man does that feel good. I think I am trying to say I love to ride my bike and to be able to do that once again makes me a happy guy. With all this revitalization in a strange way I feel like I’ve somehow come back to life.
The positive energy of now mixing with the rush of anticipation of what’s to come has me in a tizzy. I am jumping up and down in place thinking about needing to wear sunblock again. I can’t wait to hear the wind whip through the leaves. I can’t wait for the Sabres to rip through the Leafs… again. All this energy and a desire to go in 5 directions at once… I love it.
As far as work goes I’m going to need all this extra energy. Our staff is moving down the street one block to one of our other buildings. When you have 30,000+ items in your inventory, that’s quite a job. Add in the fact that we are expected to complete the move in 6 weeks and we have the added task of needing to help the business in the building we are moving to. We have to help them turn it around but the decks are really stacked against us. They have a brutal location, little to no promotion, an ancient store space, a budget the size of a caterpillar and an owner who is out of touch. We’ve done our own thing for 10 years or more and have had some great success but now we’re supposed to turn them around and also restart our own thing while we are performing that minor miracle. So yeah, I don’t know if I’ll still be working with this company a few months from now or if there will be a company in a few months but on the bright side if these are the last few weeks of what was a good long nearly 7 year run for me, at least it will be especially stressful, brutal and ridiculous. That’s sarcasm by the way.
On the real bright side I have so many cool things coming up in the next few weeks. Let’s see I am going to see E.T. for FREE at Sheas on Sunday (I’ve never seen E.T.!), I am going to see improv at Sugar City. I am going to Comedysportz again this weekend and a Muppet Show marathon in a few weeks. I am going to see an operatic adaptation of “Hamlet” at the Live at the Met series shown in Regal theaters here in Buffalo. I am going to get delicious pierogies at the Broadway Market one of these weekends very soon. I may go to see Roller Derby on the 27th and I’m still going to the Tuesday night UB film seminar movie series at the Market Arcade until it ends in mid-April. If any of these things sound interesting to you, feel free to ask me about them and I’ll give you the 411… whether you wish to join me or not.
In the I need to get off my butt and start jogging again department my coed football league starts up on April 3rd which is only 3 weeks away. We won the title in the fall 2008 session but in spring 2009 and fall 2009 we lost in the playoffs, both times to the same team and both times we had swept them in the regular season only to lose to them in the postseason. I’m trying to switch gears this season from quarterback to receiver which is my preferred position. I run really good routes and I catch nearly everything but with my weight being so high it reduces my speed and stamina. That’s why I am trying to slim down. I want to get my burst back. With my size and skill if I can drop 30 pounds this spring I can become a very dangerous weapon on the field. Things are going well in that regard as I’ve lost about 5 pounds so far in March.
Also coming up in about a month is the annual 91.3fm WBNY Alumni weekend. This is where I go back to Buffalo State and do a radio show and hope the equipment hasn’t changed much from the year before. I already have a few hundred songs I’m considering for the show and with a 2-hour shift and a few mic breaks mixed in I think I may have time for about 25-30 songs. So an elimination process will be happening soon. When I get a timeslot I will post it on here and let everyone and their cats know about it. I’ve had the Friday night 10pm to midnight slot for 5 years running so I hope to get that one again.
Then in May we’re talking about the returns of the kickball team and softball team(s)! I can’t wait to sweat and hustle and laugh with everyone. I probably say this every year but this spring is going to be great! With so many things going on and the right mix in the air my internal flame has been reignited. I’ve gone from simmer to high flame. Here’s to fires being lit under all of us. I hope the spring brings all of you many things to look forward to.
Saturday, March 6, 2010
The Time Travelers Life (3-6-10)
“You may say I'm a dreamer
But I'm not the only one
I hope someday you'll join us
And the world will live as one”
-John Lennon
When you are a kid you don’t have much. We don’t know much and not much is expected of us, although don’t ask a kid that, they might disagree since they know everything. It’s true though. As kids we aren’t expected to pay bills, go to work or raise a family. Yes we had some responsibility but it was cake. We basically had school and chores. Compare that to the grown up world and it’s a vacation. Because we had so much time on our hands when we were kids we had to find things to occupy that time. In my case it was a lot of cartoons, sports, toys and maybe the occasional book.
When those things didn’t fit the bill, I spent a lot of time daydreaming and using my imagination. Sometimes I’d incorporate my imagination into the sports and toys. I remember going over to School 36 in Days Park many days after school. Someone painted a baseball strike zone box on the brick wall facing the park. I never knew who did it but I was really thankful. Occasionally I would go over there with my mitt and a tennis ball (a baseball might have damaged the wall) and I would pitch a game. I’d pretend there were batters coming up and I’d keep track of how many outs there were and what the count was. I’d pretend that if I threw a lousy pitch the invisible team would get a hit and it seemed like I was always pitching for a team that had a one run lead so it was imperative to throw good pitches. Most times I won but occasionally I’d pretend I’d lose a close game, especially if I was thinking about pitching another game right away. Then I could redeem myself and help my imaginary team to ultimate victory.
I’d use my imagination with my G.I. Joe and Star Wars action figures too. I’d grab a large box and cut it up taking a long flat side from the box or sometimes a few of them taped or bound together, lay it face down and pretend it was the interior of a space ship for the action figures. I’d find some wood or even better some Styrofoam and carve it into furniture and parts of the ship. I’d make a deck complete with stations for the crew, a sick bay, personal quarters, a rec room and usually a landing dock too. I’d pretend the crew was on a mission like something out of Star Trek, or Aliens. “Aliens” was a popular mission… a bunch of space marines going to a foreign planet to encounter something unexpected. I’d use He Man figures as ferocious monsters because they were noticeably bigger than the G.I. Joes.
When sports or toys weren’t on the menu or if I needed a break, I’d plant myself somewhere comfortable and daydream. It’s something I do to this day and it’s something I find very healthy. I think everyone should do it. Sometimes you can get away from stress, boredom and the trials of daily life simply by pretending you are elsewhere. I’d often play little games in my mind. I’d wonder what it would be like if I were Teen Wolf, Ferris Bueller or part of the Breakfast Club. What would I do different? I’d dream about being a sports hero or a singer songwriter. I’d dream about being a photographer for Sports Illustrated when they were shooting their swimsuit issue. I’d dream about winning the lottery and what I would buy and who I would help. I’d dream about so many things but one of my all time favorites that I still dream about is having a superpower.
Have you ever played that game or had that conversation? You ask, “If you could have one superpower what would it be?” Growing up I’d always change my mind. One week I wanted to be able to fly, the next I wanted invisibility. Seeing movies and reading comics would always give me more ideas. For a long time I wanted the Force, like in Star Wars. For a brief period I even wanted the Schwartz. When I was younger I could never really decide. There’s so many cool superpowers out there, how could I?
I’ll still think about it once in a while but when I do the last few years I’ve always wanted the same power: the ability to time travel. I know that sounds a tad on the selfish side but maybe that’s a byproduct of being single for as long as I have. If I had a wife or my own family perhaps I’d desire a different imaginary superpower. With the ability to time travel I think about all the wonderful things I could see. Right off the bat, if I had that ability I’d go ahead a few days and get the Powerball or Mega Millions numbers and play them. Then I’d donate most of the cash to charities because I could always get more cash later.
Imagine the possibilities with time travel. I know what some of you might be thinking, why not go into the past and stop horrific things from happening. I could stop assassinations and wars and tragedies. There are no limits to the types of things I could do but I have to be honest and however silly I have given this a lot of thought over the years. I’m not interested so much with what I could do with the superpower but more what I could see.
There are no rules for time travel because no one can do it but I feel like there’s an unwritten code or prime directive if you will about altering events in the past. I don’t have much of a conscience about tweaking the future because it hasn’t happened yet but taking something off course no matter how good intended a time traveler would be could have disastrous results. Do you remember Back to the Future? Michael J. Fox accidentally going back in time caused so much trouble he almost wiped out his family and town’s existence. Plus his tinkering with past events caused the need for not one but 2 subpar sequels! He barely did anything and he “fixed” it but even that still had ramifications. No wonder Doc Brown was all over him about not altering a single detail.
I guess I’m saying that things that happened needed to happen to get where we are. So with that in mind I would use my superpower to see things in the past, not change them. Most of my travels would be related to the arts and travel. Could you imagine being in New York City in 1976 and seeing Blondie at a dive bar? I’d go to Minnesota around 1980 and see Prince. I’d go to the Whiskey in the 60’s to see the Doors. I’d go see the Beatles at Shea Stadium. I would go to Woodstock and see all those bands and stoned naked hippies. I’d go and see old Super Bowls, old Olympic games (could you imagine being in Berlin to see Jesse Owens stick it to the Nazis in 1936?) and I’d revisit a ton of local history. I’m a huge fan of my hometown and I would absolutely love to see it in its heyday.
Before we go any further there are several important questions to be answered about my time traveling superpowers. Would I let anyone know of my power? How would I handle the logistics of the time traveling? What would I affect in my own past? What would I affect in the future?
Going a few days into the future so I can learn of the winning lottery numbers for a mega jackpot is key. It’s key because once I’m rich I don’t have to work any longer so I’d have the whole day to explore things in other times. While most would be out working, I’d be out of time. Secondly I could buy a house so I can time travel in peace and privacy. It would be my hub. No one would know I was gone for large chunks of time. Thirdly, to go back to certain times would require certain clothing, perhaps specific coins or paper money so I could blend in and not look like Marty McFly in Back to the Future where the whole town thought he was in the Coast Guard or something like that because his 80’s vest looked like a life preserver to them. My goal would be to blend in and take in the beauty and sights, not to be a spectacle or draw attention to myself. Like I said, I would give lots of cash to charities but also having tons of cash will unable my time traveling to be easier. I’d be able to buy period clothes, get authentic currency and make certain my trip would go smoothly. Even if it’s a superpower, it’s not cheap!
Would I let anyone know? I would say no, but down the road when I’ve mastered the ability, who knows. If it got out on a massive level then there would be expectations and discussions. Could you imagine? People would want me to go back and kill Hitler, stop 9/11, maybe even save Jesus, who knows? There would be debate about my actions or lack thereof. Think about it, it would be hell to have a superpower in this day and age with public knowledge. The media are everywhere, hatred still runs rampant when someone disagrees and I might even have to worry about my life because of people who would think I was the devil or in league with him. As Uncle Ben said to Peter Parker, “with great power comes great responsibility”. So the more I thought about it, the less likely I feel like I’d let anyone know I lived the Time Traveler’s Life.
I already mentioned how I feel about changing anything in the past. I would only want to go and see historic events or things that were just plain cool. I’d want to blend, not stick out. I’d be taking a great risk as it is just by going to different places. Something as simple as me littering in the past could greatly impact the future so I’d have to be careful with all my actions and even my words. I know the temptation would be there to alter my own past. I could get better grades, make the right choices, eliminate mistakes, hook up with someone I missed a chance with and even prevent bad things from happening to me but I wouldn’t do that. Changing one decision I made in the past could make things better but also it could make things remarkably worse. I’m reminded of a simple cliché, what’s done is done. I would only be a ghost of the past, nothing more.
What about the future? What would I disrupt? What would I force forward? This is very interesting. If I went ahead 30 years and brought back things would that be wrong? How I feel about affecting the past is not how I feel about changing the future. Why? Because there is no future. How do we know what will happen and when? If I went into the future and found the cure for cancer and brought it back and gave it to someone, how are we to know that the person I gave it to didn’t discover the cure anyway? Maybe I was supposed to give it to them… maybe that’s how “we” discover it. How could we know? You simply cannot know what will happen in the future, especially the further you go down the line.
Would I stop great catastrophes from happening from knowledge I’d get from the future? I think I’d do my best. If I knew something big was going to happen I would try to warn people as anonymously as I could. It would be tough because maintaining my secret would be key. Besides if I wandered around predicting the future people would think I was a crackpot or worse. Some might think I was a criminal or associated with criminals if I tipped authorities about future tragedies. They’d say, “How did you know about that? You must have been involved somehow”. I would have to carry that weight… the weight of knowing that I couldn’t prevent everything bad from happening.
Damn, the more I think about it, having a superpower would be hard work. But if and when the day comes… I’ll be ready.
But I'm not the only one
I hope someday you'll join us
And the world will live as one”
-John Lennon
When you are a kid you don’t have much. We don’t know much and not much is expected of us, although don’t ask a kid that, they might disagree since they know everything. It’s true though. As kids we aren’t expected to pay bills, go to work or raise a family. Yes we had some responsibility but it was cake. We basically had school and chores. Compare that to the grown up world and it’s a vacation. Because we had so much time on our hands when we were kids we had to find things to occupy that time. In my case it was a lot of cartoons, sports, toys and maybe the occasional book.
When those things didn’t fit the bill, I spent a lot of time daydreaming and using my imagination. Sometimes I’d incorporate my imagination into the sports and toys. I remember going over to School 36 in Days Park many days after school. Someone painted a baseball strike zone box on the brick wall facing the park. I never knew who did it but I was really thankful. Occasionally I would go over there with my mitt and a tennis ball (a baseball might have damaged the wall) and I would pitch a game. I’d pretend there were batters coming up and I’d keep track of how many outs there were and what the count was. I’d pretend that if I threw a lousy pitch the invisible team would get a hit and it seemed like I was always pitching for a team that had a one run lead so it was imperative to throw good pitches. Most times I won but occasionally I’d pretend I’d lose a close game, especially if I was thinking about pitching another game right away. Then I could redeem myself and help my imaginary team to ultimate victory.
I’d use my imagination with my G.I. Joe and Star Wars action figures too. I’d grab a large box and cut it up taking a long flat side from the box or sometimes a few of them taped or bound together, lay it face down and pretend it was the interior of a space ship for the action figures. I’d find some wood or even better some Styrofoam and carve it into furniture and parts of the ship. I’d make a deck complete with stations for the crew, a sick bay, personal quarters, a rec room and usually a landing dock too. I’d pretend the crew was on a mission like something out of Star Trek, or Aliens. “Aliens” was a popular mission… a bunch of space marines going to a foreign planet to encounter something unexpected. I’d use He Man figures as ferocious monsters because they were noticeably bigger than the G.I. Joes.
When sports or toys weren’t on the menu or if I needed a break, I’d plant myself somewhere comfortable and daydream. It’s something I do to this day and it’s something I find very healthy. I think everyone should do it. Sometimes you can get away from stress, boredom and the trials of daily life simply by pretending you are elsewhere. I’d often play little games in my mind. I’d wonder what it would be like if I were Teen Wolf, Ferris Bueller or part of the Breakfast Club. What would I do different? I’d dream about being a sports hero or a singer songwriter. I’d dream about being a photographer for Sports Illustrated when they were shooting their swimsuit issue. I’d dream about winning the lottery and what I would buy and who I would help. I’d dream about so many things but one of my all time favorites that I still dream about is having a superpower.
Have you ever played that game or had that conversation? You ask, “If you could have one superpower what would it be?” Growing up I’d always change my mind. One week I wanted to be able to fly, the next I wanted invisibility. Seeing movies and reading comics would always give me more ideas. For a long time I wanted the Force, like in Star Wars. For a brief period I even wanted the Schwartz. When I was younger I could never really decide. There’s so many cool superpowers out there, how could I?
I’ll still think about it once in a while but when I do the last few years I’ve always wanted the same power: the ability to time travel. I know that sounds a tad on the selfish side but maybe that’s a byproduct of being single for as long as I have. If I had a wife or my own family perhaps I’d desire a different imaginary superpower. With the ability to time travel I think about all the wonderful things I could see. Right off the bat, if I had that ability I’d go ahead a few days and get the Powerball or Mega Millions numbers and play them. Then I’d donate most of the cash to charities because I could always get more cash later.
Imagine the possibilities with time travel. I know what some of you might be thinking, why not go into the past and stop horrific things from happening. I could stop assassinations and wars and tragedies. There are no limits to the types of things I could do but I have to be honest and however silly I have given this a lot of thought over the years. I’m not interested so much with what I could do with the superpower but more what I could see.
There are no rules for time travel because no one can do it but I feel like there’s an unwritten code or prime directive if you will about altering events in the past. I don’t have much of a conscience about tweaking the future because it hasn’t happened yet but taking something off course no matter how good intended a time traveler would be could have disastrous results. Do you remember Back to the Future? Michael J. Fox accidentally going back in time caused so much trouble he almost wiped out his family and town’s existence. Plus his tinkering with past events caused the need for not one but 2 subpar sequels! He barely did anything and he “fixed” it but even that still had ramifications. No wonder Doc Brown was all over him about not altering a single detail.
I guess I’m saying that things that happened needed to happen to get where we are. So with that in mind I would use my superpower to see things in the past, not change them. Most of my travels would be related to the arts and travel. Could you imagine being in New York City in 1976 and seeing Blondie at a dive bar? I’d go to Minnesota around 1980 and see Prince. I’d go to the Whiskey in the 60’s to see the Doors. I’d go see the Beatles at Shea Stadium. I would go to Woodstock and see all those bands and stoned naked hippies. I’d go and see old Super Bowls, old Olympic games (could you imagine being in Berlin to see Jesse Owens stick it to the Nazis in 1936?) and I’d revisit a ton of local history. I’m a huge fan of my hometown and I would absolutely love to see it in its heyday.
Before we go any further there are several important questions to be answered about my time traveling superpowers. Would I let anyone know of my power? How would I handle the logistics of the time traveling? What would I affect in my own past? What would I affect in the future?
Going a few days into the future so I can learn of the winning lottery numbers for a mega jackpot is key. It’s key because once I’m rich I don’t have to work any longer so I’d have the whole day to explore things in other times. While most would be out working, I’d be out of time. Secondly I could buy a house so I can time travel in peace and privacy. It would be my hub. No one would know I was gone for large chunks of time. Thirdly, to go back to certain times would require certain clothing, perhaps specific coins or paper money so I could blend in and not look like Marty McFly in Back to the Future where the whole town thought he was in the Coast Guard or something like that because his 80’s vest looked like a life preserver to them. My goal would be to blend in and take in the beauty and sights, not to be a spectacle or draw attention to myself. Like I said, I would give lots of cash to charities but also having tons of cash will unable my time traveling to be easier. I’d be able to buy period clothes, get authentic currency and make certain my trip would go smoothly. Even if it’s a superpower, it’s not cheap!
Would I let anyone know? I would say no, but down the road when I’ve mastered the ability, who knows. If it got out on a massive level then there would be expectations and discussions. Could you imagine? People would want me to go back and kill Hitler, stop 9/11, maybe even save Jesus, who knows? There would be debate about my actions or lack thereof. Think about it, it would be hell to have a superpower in this day and age with public knowledge. The media are everywhere, hatred still runs rampant when someone disagrees and I might even have to worry about my life because of people who would think I was the devil or in league with him. As Uncle Ben said to Peter Parker, “with great power comes great responsibility”. So the more I thought about it, the less likely I feel like I’d let anyone know I lived the Time Traveler’s Life.
I already mentioned how I feel about changing anything in the past. I would only want to go and see historic events or things that were just plain cool. I’d want to blend, not stick out. I’d be taking a great risk as it is just by going to different places. Something as simple as me littering in the past could greatly impact the future so I’d have to be careful with all my actions and even my words. I know the temptation would be there to alter my own past. I could get better grades, make the right choices, eliminate mistakes, hook up with someone I missed a chance with and even prevent bad things from happening to me but I wouldn’t do that. Changing one decision I made in the past could make things better but also it could make things remarkably worse. I’m reminded of a simple cliché, what’s done is done. I would only be a ghost of the past, nothing more.
What about the future? What would I disrupt? What would I force forward? This is very interesting. If I went ahead 30 years and brought back things would that be wrong? How I feel about affecting the past is not how I feel about changing the future. Why? Because there is no future. How do we know what will happen and when? If I went into the future and found the cure for cancer and brought it back and gave it to someone, how are we to know that the person I gave it to didn’t discover the cure anyway? Maybe I was supposed to give it to them… maybe that’s how “we” discover it. How could we know? You simply cannot know what will happen in the future, especially the further you go down the line.
Would I stop great catastrophes from happening from knowledge I’d get from the future? I think I’d do my best. If I knew something big was going to happen I would try to warn people as anonymously as I could. It would be tough because maintaining my secret would be key. Besides if I wandered around predicting the future people would think I was a crackpot or worse. Some might think I was a criminal or associated with criminals if I tipped authorities about future tragedies. They’d say, “How did you know about that? You must have been involved somehow”. I would have to carry that weight… the weight of knowing that I couldn’t prevent everything bad from happening.
Damn, the more I think about it, having a superpower would be hard work. But if and when the day comes… I’ll be ready.
Saturday, February 27, 2010
MINE! (2-27-10)
I’m bending down to pick up hundreds of CDs scattered across the floor and I am angry that I am doing it. On one hand the bastard who did this should be made to clean up this mess but on the other hand I realistically know that’s not going to happen and my boss who is in her 50’s and just weeks away from knee replacement surgery is practically the only one cleaning up. I can’t let her do this on her own even if I hate the reason why we’re doing it. I have a sense of what’s right unlike the person who left the room this way minutes earlier.
It was around 5pm and the building was empty except for me and my boss who was a few rooms over. I was on my computer at my desk and listening to the end of the United States/Finland Olympic hockey game. The U.S. had the game well in hand and my mind began to drift from work to my plans for the evening. I was going to go see Shutter Island with a few friends and I was very excited. Suddenly there were raised voices coming from the room my boss was in. She was arguing with the son of the owner. He’s the Executive Vice President of the company but he’s a spoiled child who thinks he’s entitled to everything and has a hissy fit whenever he hears the word no. Little did I know how bad his fit today would be.
It’s all about a battle of 2 companies in 1 company. I know what you are thinking, that doesn’t make sense. Basically he is trying to take over everything from within and we have been and continue to be in his sights. So we fight for survival but in reality our fight has been pointless. His father and the rest of the company say they are on our side and show sympathy towards us but no one will tell him no or stand up to him.
To summarize, we used to be one happy company. He would buy merchandize for us (with his father’s money) and we would sell it. He’d buy a little for himself as well but it would be specific items and not really in conflict with what we were doing. Then a few years back he began to get greedy and upset. My boss rejected his crazy ideas one too many times and he became spiteful. He turned into Fredo Corleone from the Godfather. He wanted respect because of who his father (the owner and creator of the company) was but as we all know respect can only truly come from who you are, not what your last name is. He stopped coming to us with ideas and went straight to his father, pointing out every little thing we were doing wrong, even if what we were doing wasn’t really all that wrong. He’d say there was a better way to do it and we won’t listen to him. Over time he convinced his father he was onto something and he had that better way and then he started his own large scale online sales company. Now why a company needs 2 separate online sales companies selling the same things, I’ll never know but for the last 2 years it’s been this way.
This past year has been the roughest with at least half our staff being let go and with him getting 90% of the merchandise bought “for the company”. You’d think his father, if he wouldn’t say no to him would close us down and be done with it but for some reason he doesn’t want to give his son everything… although most times it seems like it. The latest blow is that he is giving his son the building our crew has been in for a decade or more doing our thing. First he steals our business, now he is going to steal our building. We showed this failed idiot how to do online business now he is taking it all from us. It must be nice. It must be nice to have someone else take all the risks, show you the way and then you ride the thing home when you realize it’s safe. Let’s also mention that with our crew, the father gets all the profit, but his son’s business seems a little more complicated. I’m not sure how much the father is getting back but you can be sure the son is keeping a chunk for himself. Meanwhile I’ve seen friends lose their jobs because of greed and ego.
So the end result is we are now moving into the same building as our Main and Lafayette record store. It’s a smaller space but we have a smaller crew so maybe it could work. Hopefully being in a different building would mean seeing less of this douche and being free to do things without him telling his daddy that we’re selling things too cheap, or too fast or too slow or whatever else he can find wrong. So where were we?
I’m sitting at my desk and I hear the raised voices and I’m thinking oh crap. He’s getting our building but he wants to move in immediately. Meanwhile we have 30,000 things for sale online. You can’t physically move that much stuff without some time. We have been working on it all week but of course a 1-2 month job should be a 1-2 day job in the eyes of someone lacking reason and logic. His opinion is that we should leave all of our merchandise behind for him. That would get us over there quicker, lol. Then his brainstorm was that we should move out right away and then he would make sure we’d get 70% of our stuff back after he organized it. Again that’s laughable in that he would simply take all the best stuff and give us the less desirable items. Unfortunately his father didn’t think that idea was so bad earlier this week and the son thought he had a sucker but then when the old man discussed it with my boss and a company vice president they saw the idea for what it was, a way for him to steal a bunch of good stuff from his dad and sabotage us at the same time. Miraculously they told him no. Needless to say, he was not pleased.
The raised voices turned to outright screaming within seconds and then I heard a loud glass shattering crash. I jumped up from my desk and walked 2 rooms over into a larger area where the son was yelling at my boss, a company vice president and his father, the old man himself. He heard me come rushing into the room and screamed my name; “ED! DON’T YOU HAVE TO LIST?” Listing is the act of listing items online for sale, which is what I was doing prior to the spectacle. I looked at him coldly. He rephrased the question again screaming at me and basically telling me that I should be at my desk working. I didn’t say a word but I did raise my right hand and showed him a single finger.
I came into the room wondering if he had hurt my boss but there were actually 3 people in the room with him including the top 2 people in the company. Would that matter? He continued to scream back and forth with my boss and then in a fit of rage he grabbed boxes of brand new CDs from a colleague’s desk and threw it across the room. CDs were flying everywhere. He grabbed another box, and then a cardboard tray full of more CDs and flung it. Suddenly hundreds of CDs were all over the floor. He temporarily stormed out with a barrage of screaming and insults.
I remember thinking I was happy his father could bear witness to this. I had encountered this spoiled brat doing this a few times, although not to this extent. In a way I thought this was great. Everyone who mattered could see him for the psycho he is. Maybe he’d hang himself today.
I walked across some of the wreckage to see if my boss was alright because most of the venomous tirade was directed at her. Then the son storms back into the room screaming and throwing around more stuff. He grabbed shopping carts full of merchandise and threw them over. He grabbed more boxes and trays of CDs and threw them on the floor and actually some landed on his 80-something year old father’s foot although he didn’t seem hurt or anything. He grabbed a ceramic mug and smashed it on the wall, then grabbed an apple and threw that into a wall while screaming and with fire coming out of his eyes. Forgive me for saying this but I started to hope he’d stroke or have an attack of some kind. I’d never seen someone flip out like that ever. On one hand it was really scary because he was capable of doing anything to anyone but on the other hand it was the saddest, sorriest display I’d ever seen. This was a baby throwing a tantrum because he wasn’t getting what he wanted. This was someone who felt entitled screaming MINE! like a child.
After he finished trashing the 2nd room he glared at us with demonic intensity. He screamed at me again; “ED! YOU SHOULD BE WORKING RIGHT NOW! YOU SHOULD BE AT YOUR DESK!” I didn’t reply. I looked a hole through him. I was both scared and angry. Would he attack me? If I said something to him he might. If he attacked me though it would be the biggest mistake of his life because I would defend myself and I would have f-ed him up something fierce. After all the things he’s done to me or tried to do to me over the last few years there’s no one I despise more than this tool.
He wasn’t through with me yet. He didn’t get a response from me but he could probably tell by my face that I was very angry. He yelled “YOU LOOK LIKE YOU WANT TO SAY SOMETHING, YOU WANT TO SAY SOMETHING TO ME?” I didn’t move a muscle. “YOU WANT TO SAY SOMETHING?!?” Finally I replied; “Yeah, I want to say something”. Quickly his father turned to me and said “Don’t say anything”. It was like we were at the zoo and the zookeeper was telling us not to feed or provoke the animals.
The son realized that I wasn’t going to engage so after a few more screaming rants he departed this time for good. I took a look around at the damage. Hundreds of CDs were everywhere. Maybe a maybe DVDs were on the floor. Also a lot of books and all kinds of knick knacks were scattered about. My boss started to cry and was pleading with the old man that he does something about his son. He just seemed ambivalent about it on the outside. I’m sure he was upset, disappointed, embarrassed and who knows what else internally but he seemed so cold and distant on the outside. Maybe he was in disbelief.
I worked my way over to my boss who was bordering on hysterical and I gave her a big hug. While I did that I saw what made that initial glass breaking sound that sprung me from my desk and into the tirade. It was a laptop computer that one of my co-workers uses. He threw that at or towards my boss and it hit the wall and shattered. Add that into all the CDs that had cracked or smashed cases and he made well over a thousand bucks of damage. Plus now we’ll have to take all the damaged CDs offline because if the case is damaged they are not new. Yeah we can give it a new case but we’ll have to remove the factory seal to do it and that’s not something that can be replicated.
Was the police called? No. Was anything done right after this unfortunate incident occurred? Again no… but there was a huge mess to be cleaned up. I was of the opinion that the jerk that did it should be responsible to clean it, or maybe he should send some of his staff to clean up but that wasn’t going to happen no matter how much I wanted it to. My idealistic sense of honor was again rendered useless by an evil, evil man who never has to pay for what he does. It burns me but what can I about it. My presence alone in this company infuriates him so at least I have that going for me. (FYI- He’s tried to have me fired a few times but has no real authority over me so he was denied)
My boss settled down a bit, got it together and started to pick things up from the floor. The old man sat there… he’s nearly 90 so we weren’t expecting him to get on the floor and pick things up. The vice president was kind of talking with the old man and it was just my boss picking things up. I was supposed to leave but I called my friend and delayed my plans a little bit. I couldn’t leave her to pick everything up by herself. So we both were doing it and thankfully the building engineer showed up and helped out to so we got everything picked up in about a half hour.
As usual with this company nothing will come of this other than stories and blogs but this spoiled idiot is getting awfully close to going completely over the edge. Will it happen? It just might. We are moving out of our building to accommodate this fool but it appears that day when we are done can’t come fast enough. I hate that this evil man can get away with this crap constantly but it does make me happy to still be around to give him the finger every once in a while. People say why don’t you get another job? It’s not that easy. I have a loyalty to my boss and I know if I left it would be harder for her and our branch of the company to survive and I do take a measure of pleasure from the fact that my daily presence pisses the son off. I feel like in some way if I leave he wins. I know that’s not rational. In a darker sense, I think I also stay because I want to see the day when he melts down and digs his own grave. If today was any indicator that day may be coming.
It was around 5pm and the building was empty except for me and my boss who was a few rooms over. I was on my computer at my desk and listening to the end of the United States/Finland Olympic hockey game. The U.S. had the game well in hand and my mind began to drift from work to my plans for the evening. I was going to go see Shutter Island with a few friends and I was very excited. Suddenly there were raised voices coming from the room my boss was in. She was arguing with the son of the owner. He’s the Executive Vice President of the company but he’s a spoiled child who thinks he’s entitled to everything and has a hissy fit whenever he hears the word no. Little did I know how bad his fit today would be.
It’s all about a battle of 2 companies in 1 company. I know what you are thinking, that doesn’t make sense. Basically he is trying to take over everything from within and we have been and continue to be in his sights. So we fight for survival but in reality our fight has been pointless. His father and the rest of the company say they are on our side and show sympathy towards us but no one will tell him no or stand up to him.
To summarize, we used to be one happy company. He would buy merchandize for us (with his father’s money) and we would sell it. He’d buy a little for himself as well but it would be specific items and not really in conflict with what we were doing. Then a few years back he began to get greedy and upset. My boss rejected his crazy ideas one too many times and he became spiteful. He turned into Fredo Corleone from the Godfather. He wanted respect because of who his father (the owner and creator of the company) was but as we all know respect can only truly come from who you are, not what your last name is. He stopped coming to us with ideas and went straight to his father, pointing out every little thing we were doing wrong, even if what we were doing wasn’t really all that wrong. He’d say there was a better way to do it and we won’t listen to him. Over time he convinced his father he was onto something and he had that better way and then he started his own large scale online sales company. Now why a company needs 2 separate online sales companies selling the same things, I’ll never know but for the last 2 years it’s been this way.
This past year has been the roughest with at least half our staff being let go and with him getting 90% of the merchandise bought “for the company”. You’d think his father, if he wouldn’t say no to him would close us down and be done with it but for some reason he doesn’t want to give his son everything… although most times it seems like it. The latest blow is that he is giving his son the building our crew has been in for a decade or more doing our thing. First he steals our business, now he is going to steal our building. We showed this failed idiot how to do online business now he is taking it all from us. It must be nice. It must be nice to have someone else take all the risks, show you the way and then you ride the thing home when you realize it’s safe. Let’s also mention that with our crew, the father gets all the profit, but his son’s business seems a little more complicated. I’m not sure how much the father is getting back but you can be sure the son is keeping a chunk for himself. Meanwhile I’ve seen friends lose their jobs because of greed and ego.
So the end result is we are now moving into the same building as our Main and Lafayette record store. It’s a smaller space but we have a smaller crew so maybe it could work. Hopefully being in a different building would mean seeing less of this douche and being free to do things without him telling his daddy that we’re selling things too cheap, or too fast or too slow or whatever else he can find wrong. So where were we?
I’m sitting at my desk and I hear the raised voices and I’m thinking oh crap. He’s getting our building but he wants to move in immediately. Meanwhile we have 30,000 things for sale online. You can’t physically move that much stuff without some time. We have been working on it all week but of course a 1-2 month job should be a 1-2 day job in the eyes of someone lacking reason and logic. His opinion is that we should leave all of our merchandise behind for him. That would get us over there quicker, lol. Then his brainstorm was that we should move out right away and then he would make sure we’d get 70% of our stuff back after he organized it. Again that’s laughable in that he would simply take all the best stuff and give us the less desirable items. Unfortunately his father didn’t think that idea was so bad earlier this week and the son thought he had a sucker but then when the old man discussed it with my boss and a company vice president they saw the idea for what it was, a way for him to steal a bunch of good stuff from his dad and sabotage us at the same time. Miraculously they told him no. Needless to say, he was not pleased.
The raised voices turned to outright screaming within seconds and then I heard a loud glass shattering crash. I jumped up from my desk and walked 2 rooms over into a larger area where the son was yelling at my boss, a company vice president and his father, the old man himself. He heard me come rushing into the room and screamed my name; “ED! DON’T YOU HAVE TO LIST?” Listing is the act of listing items online for sale, which is what I was doing prior to the spectacle. I looked at him coldly. He rephrased the question again screaming at me and basically telling me that I should be at my desk working. I didn’t say a word but I did raise my right hand and showed him a single finger.
I came into the room wondering if he had hurt my boss but there were actually 3 people in the room with him including the top 2 people in the company. Would that matter? He continued to scream back and forth with my boss and then in a fit of rage he grabbed boxes of brand new CDs from a colleague’s desk and threw it across the room. CDs were flying everywhere. He grabbed another box, and then a cardboard tray full of more CDs and flung it. Suddenly hundreds of CDs were all over the floor. He temporarily stormed out with a barrage of screaming and insults.
I remember thinking I was happy his father could bear witness to this. I had encountered this spoiled brat doing this a few times, although not to this extent. In a way I thought this was great. Everyone who mattered could see him for the psycho he is. Maybe he’d hang himself today.
I walked across some of the wreckage to see if my boss was alright because most of the venomous tirade was directed at her. Then the son storms back into the room screaming and throwing around more stuff. He grabbed shopping carts full of merchandise and threw them over. He grabbed more boxes and trays of CDs and threw them on the floor and actually some landed on his 80-something year old father’s foot although he didn’t seem hurt or anything. He grabbed a ceramic mug and smashed it on the wall, then grabbed an apple and threw that into a wall while screaming and with fire coming out of his eyes. Forgive me for saying this but I started to hope he’d stroke or have an attack of some kind. I’d never seen someone flip out like that ever. On one hand it was really scary because he was capable of doing anything to anyone but on the other hand it was the saddest, sorriest display I’d ever seen. This was a baby throwing a tantrum because he wasn’t getting what he wanted. This was someone who felt entitled screaming MINE! like a child.
After he finished trashing the 2nd room he glared at us with demonic intensity. He screamed at me again; “ED! YOU SHOULD BE WORKING RIGHT NOW! YOU SHOULD BE AT YOUR DESK!” I didn’t reply. I looked a hole through him. I was both scared and angry. Would he attack me? If I said something to him he might. If he attacked me though it would be the biggest mistake of his life because I would defend myself and I would have f-ed him up something fierce. After all the things he’s done to me or tried to do to me over the last few years there’s no one I despise more than this tool.
He wasn’t through with me yet. He didn’t get a response from me but he could probably tell by my face that I was very angry. He yelled “YOU LOOK LIKE YOU WANT TO SAY SOMETHING, YOU WANT TO SAY SOMETHING TO ME?” I didn’t move a muscle. “YOU WANT TO SAY SOMETHING?!?” Finally I replied; “Yeah, I want to say something”. Quickly his father turned to me and said “Don’t say anything”. It was like we were at the zoo and the zookeeper was telling us not to feed or provoke the animals.
The son realized that I wasn’t going to engage so after a few more screaming rants he departed this time for good. I took a look around at the damage. Hundreds of CDs were everywhere. Maybe a maybe DVDs were on the floor. Also a lot of books and all kinds of knick knacks were scattered about. My boss started to cry and was pleading with the old man that he does something about his son. He just seemed ambivalent about it on the outside. I’m sure he was upset, disappointed, embarrassed and who knows what else internally but he seemed so cold and distant on the outside. Maybe he was in disbelief.
I worked my way over to my boss who was bordering on hysterical and I gave her a big hug. While I did that I saw what made that initial glass breaking sound that sprung me from my desk and into the tirade. It was a laptop computer that one of my co-workers uses. He threw that at or towards my boss and it hit the wall and shattered. Add that into all the CDs that had cracked or smashed cases and he made well over a thousand bucks of damage. Plus now we’ll have to take all the damaged CDs offline because if the case is damaged they are not new. Yeah we can give it a new case but we’ll have to remove the factory seal to do it and that’s not something that can be replicated.
Was the police called? No. Was anything done right after this unfortunate incident occurred? Again no… but there was a huge mess to be cleaned up. I was of the opinion that the jerk that did it should be responsible to clean it, or maybe he should send some of his staff to clean up but that wasn’t going to happen no matter how much I wanted it to. My idealistic sense of honor was again rendered useless by an evil, evil man who never has to pay for what he does. It burns me but what can I about it. My presence alone in this company infuriates him so at least I have that going for me. (FYI- He’s tried to have me fired a few times but has no real authority over me so he was denied)
My boss settled down a bit, got it together and started to pick things up from the floor. The old man sat there… he’s nearly 90 so we weren’t expecting him to get on the floor and pick things up. The vice president was kind of talking with the old man and it was just my boss picking things up. I was supposed to leave but I called my friend and delayed my plans a little bit. I couldn’t leave her to pick everything up by herself. So we both were doing it and thankfully the building engineer showed up and helped out to so we got everything picked up in about a half hour.
As usual with this company nothing will come of this other than stories and blogs but this spoiled idiot is getting awfully close to going completely over the edge. Will it happen? It just might. We are moving out of our building to accommodate this fool but it appears that day when we are done can’t come fast enough. I hate that this evil man can get away with this crap constantly but it does make me happy to still be around to give him the finger every once in a while. People say why don’t you get another job? It’s not that easy. I have a loyalty to my boss and I know if I left it would be harder for her and our branch of the company to survive and I do take a measure of pleasure from the fact that my daily presence pisses the son off. I feel like in some way if I leave he wins. I know that’s not rational. In a darker sense, I think I also stay because I want to see the day when he melts down and digs his own grave. If today was any indicator that day may be coming.
Friday, February 19, 2010
The 50 Best Debut Albums of My Experience:
Introduction: Welcome to my top 50 Debut Records. There are several things to keep in mind: The first is this is my list, so my rules. Secondly, I appreciate feedback but not things like “your list is stupid”. If you disagree with any placements or omissions, tell me what you’d do different and why. Lastly remember, there are NO RIGHT answers, it’s all relative and it’s all good. If Kenny Loggins floats your boat, that’s wonderful. Music is amazing in that it means so much to so many and very impressively, it brings us together. In fact, if you made a list of the top 10 things that bring us together, you’d find so many negative events like war, violence, hatred, or tragedy. Music may be the number one positive thing that brings all of us together!
I know what you are thinking; Ed, why are you doing this? My first reason is because I feel like it. I often live in the moment and at the moment I started this it seemed like the thing to do. Secondly, I’m doing this because I am interested how people feel after seeing this list. Do you agree, disagree? Did I leave something out? I like the discussion. Thirdly, I want to come back to this list a few years from now and see what I think then. Every week I discover some new band or record and I’m sure if I did this list even 3 months from now there would be noticeable changes. I always like looking back at things I wrote in the past and thinking what a tool I am. Do you do that? Do you look at your previous writing, or your previous work and think what was I thinking? I always believe that we are our wisest, smartest and awesomest at this moment. We are so much more awesome than we were yesterday. We are wiser and smarter too. So looking back at this list down the road might be as much fun as putting it together now.
This took me 3-4 weeks of research, listening, re-listening, and love. I’d work on a little bit each day and finally it’s done. So Let’s Get it Started!
Preface:
Before we begin with the actual list here are things you WON’T find on this list:
-Debut records I don’t know or haven’t heard so I can’t in good conscience put them on this list. Maybe I’ll get to them one day and they’ll crack a future list.
Apologies to: the Beatles, The Who, the Stones, MC5, Bob Dylan, the Band, Beach Boys, Black Sabbath, Love, Big Star, Cream, Traffic, Roxy Music, Booker T & the MGs, Cheap Trick, Genesis, Queen, The Ramones, Elvis, etc.
-Great bands/Artists with so-so debut records who got better as they went along:
Way to pace yourselves: Radiohead, Prince, Wilco, David Bowie, Alanis Morissette (Jagged Little Pill was her 3rd record), Feist, Sloan, Spoon, Stereolab, Andrew Bird, Ani DiFranco, Flaming Lips, T.Rex, Green Day (Dookie was their 3rd record), White Stripes, Billy Joel, Bob Marley & the Wailers and on and on.
-Some bands who won’t make this list simply because I don’t like them (remember my list, my rules):
Gets the Gas Face: Pearl Jam, Led Zeppelin, Aerosmith, CCR, Black Crowes, Oasis.
Honorable Mention: Good debut records that didn’t quite make the cut: (they get lovely parting gifts)
• De La Soul – 3 Feet High and Rising
• Sade – Diamond Life
• The Beta Band – The Three EPs
• Dr. Dre – The Chronic
• REM – Murmur
• Tori Amos – Little Earthquakes
• Doves – Lost Souls
• Super Furry Animals – Fuzzy Logic
• Stray Cats – Stray Cats
• Maxwell – Maxwell’s Urban Hang Suite
• Kool and the Gang – Kool and the Gang
• Modern Lovers – The Modern Lovers
• Eminem – The Slim Shady LP
• Fugazi – Repeater
• Postal Service – Give Up
• Curtis Mayfield- Curtis
• Massive Attack – Blue Lines
• St. Vincent- Marry Me
• D’Angelo – Brown Sugar
• AC/DC- T.N.T.
• ABC – The Lexicon of Love
• NAS – Illmatic
• Morrissey – Viva Hate
• Wire – Pink Flag
• Gang of Four – Entertainment!
• Daft Punk – Homework
• 3rd Bass – The Cactus Album
• Nirvana – Bleach
• Barenaked Ladies – Gordon
• Le Tigre – Le Tigre
• Lenny Kravitz – Let Love Rule
• LL Cool J- Radio
• Alicia Keys – Songs in A Minor
• Norah Jones – Come Away With Me
• Jimi Hendrix – Are You Experienced?
• PJ Harvey – Dry
• N.W.A. – N.W.A and the Posse
• Interpol – Turn on the Bright Lights
• Echo & the Bunnymen- Crocodiles
• Depeche Mode – Speak & Spell
• Run DMC – Run DMC
• Bloc Party – Silent Alarm
• Modest Mouse - This Is a Long Drive for Someone with Nothing to Think About
• Gorillaz – Gorillaz
• Poe – Hello
Without any further ado
My 50 Best Debut Albums:
50. Stone Temple Pilots – Core: One of the things I disliked about “grunge” was how murky it felt. I didn’t like a lot of the bands that came out of the Seattle scene and the primary reason was that it seemed too much kind of like how once upon a time Slayer was a little too much for me but Motley Crue was just fine. In that same vein, while Soundgarden, Alice in Chains, Pearl Jam and many others didn’t do it for me, Stone Temple Pilots seemed like a breath of fresh air in a smoky room. It felt like grunge without the grunge. Unlike most of those bands this had a bit of glam, finish and style to it and whether or not that was Scott Weiland’s fault, I don’t know but this unlike those other records clicked with me and remains a classic.
Recommended Tracks: Plush, Creep, Wicked Garden, Dead & Bloated, Sex Type Thing
49. The The – Soul Mining: An ex-girlfriend introduced me to Matt Johnson aka The The about 10 years ago. This is one of those bands a lot of people don’t know about and for good reason. Matt has always maintained a pretty low profile and his penchant for experimenting with everything from country to dark dance music makes it harder to put a name to the beat, so to speak. Many The The records are very different from the one before it which makes it hard to build a fanbase. To make a long story short, if you were going to buy one start with their/his official debut Soul Mining. The record is dancing in the rain, skipping in the sunshine and laying in the grass without a care in the world. This record is fun but not outrageous fun, it’s more the kind that will just put a big smile on your face for a while. The dancey pop music has a bit of darkness to it, but that’s what makes it so attractive.
Recommended Tracks: Uncertain Smile, This is the Day, Perfect, Giant
48. Whiskeytown – Faithless Street: In the footsteps of Uncle Tupelo, the Replacements and Bruce Springsteen came Ryan Adams and Whiskeytown. This was alternative country as it was called back then but it had an edginess to it due to Adams’ powerful and passionate delivery. This is down home warm weather late afternoon music for people who can appreciate the balance of rock and country and not want to sleep with their relatives.
Recommended Tracks: Midway Park, Top Dollar, Here’s To The Rest of the World, Faithless Street, Empty Baseball Park, Yesterday’s News
47. Sex Pistols – Nevermind the Bollocks, Here’s The Sex Pistols: This is the record your mother warned you about. It’s full of angst, anger and venom and one listen is all it takes to know this is an important album. The first time I listened to this all the way through I was so energized I wanted to go outside, break stuff and bring anarchy to my neighborhood. Instead I probably got together with a friend or two and talked a lot of crap about breaking things and probably brought anarchy to the Pizza Hut buffet.
Recommended Tracks: God Save the Queen, Submission, Anarchy in the U.K., Pretty Vacant, Holidays in the Sun
46. Jesus & Mary Chain – Psycho Candy: You know this is a fine debut record when you consider the 1st track on this 1st record could very well be their best song! Psycho Candy is probably one of the most influential records you’ve never heard as the impact was well below the radar but important nonetheless. Bands like Mazzy Star and My Bloody Valentine may never have existed without this band and this record.
Recommended Tracks: Just Like Honey, Never Understand, The Living End, Taste of Cindy
45. Funkadelic – Funkadelic: Before the mothership landed on planet Earth and before Parliament smoothed out the funk sound, Funkadelic led one nation under a groove that just happened to get down for the funk of it. If you heard this record you might be a little surprised. It’s not the George Clinton you came to know much later on. This record brings the funk but also packs a soulful punch, perhaps due to the time (1970) and that George wasn’t too far removed from a soul/doo wop group himself. You can hear the formula for funk starting to come together and this record started a run of 3 great Funkadelic records in a row through Maggot Brain.
Recommended Tracks: I Got a Thing, I Bet You, Mommy What’s a Funkadelic, Good Old Music
44. Lauryn Hill – The Miseducation of Lauryn Hill: When Lauryn left the Fugees there wasn’t too much expected. Everyone assumed Wyclef and Pras were the primary creative forces behind that group and Lauryn was simply a voice and not the big time talent she proved to be. Credit Lauryn with bridging the gap between hip hop and soul. This record had me nodding my head the way I would listening to a hip hop record.
Recommended Tracks: Doo Wap, Everything is Everything, Sweetest Thing, Ex-Factor
43. G Love & Special Sauce – G Love & Special Sauce: When I first heard G Love and Special Sauce it was on a very early Late Night with Conan O’Brien. They performed “Baby’s Got Sauce” from this 1st record. I thought man this was a band that was having fun and doing it cool. I became an instant fan and remained so throughout the 90’s until their later work started to slip and I lost interest. Above, I have a small list of bands or artists whose first record was ordinary and the greatness came later. These guys were the opposite. Their first record was great. The second was good. The third was fine. The 4th was okay and so on. The bluesy hip hop style is perfect for a summer night with friends or any chilled out occasion.
Recommended Tracks: The Things I Used To Do, Garbage Man, Blues Music, Baby’s Got Sauce, Cold Beverage
42. Ryan Adams – Heartbreaker: When Whiskeytown dissolved I was just getting into them and then to find out they were no more, well I was not pleased but when I heard Heartbreaker I knew everything was going to be alright. Ryan matched all the Whiskeytown efforts with Heartbreaker and even broke new ground as a songwriter with somewhat hopeful tones on a few tracks. Upon hearing this you could tell this was the beginning of something big and 10 records later this prolific and talented artist continues to grow.
Recommended Tracks: To Be Young, Why Do They Leave, Oh My Sweet Carolina, Come Pick Me Up, My Winding Wheel
41. Public Enemy – Yo Bum Rush the Show: P.E. exploded onto the scene in 1987 and in doing so ripped hip hop and rap music off the road it was on and sent it into a whole new direction. With Chuck D.’s relentless rhymes and delivery and Flavor Flav adding his spastic takes on the tracks, this was the future revealed. You could tell 2 things about Public Enemy by listening to this record: 1- They were among the most important voices in rap right out of the gate and 2- They were only scratching the surface of their skills. When the next record came out we expected it to be better and it was. This was a truly important group, especially during the first 10 years of their career.
Recommended Tracks: Public Enemy #1, Miuzi Weighs a Ton, Timebomb, You’re Gonna Get Yours
40. Strokes – Is This It: One of the newest records on my list. You have to keep in mind that it’s tough to take a recent debut record and say it’s one of the best ever. Part of what makes a record great is staying power and how it sounds years after the initial buzz and novelty has worn off. That’s why a record from 2001 is being considered a recent one on a list like this. Recapturing the late 70’s New York city rock scene, The Strokes perfected the sound. There was a lot of hype surrounding this record and it was well deserved, even converting the non-believers after they took a full listen. This record was just too good for the first time out and while they released 2 solid records later, they were never able to catch the magic in a bottle they had with Is This It.
Recommended Tracks: Someday, Take it or Leave It, Last Nite, The Modern Age
39. Replacements- Sorry Ma, Forgot to Take Out the Trash: All puns aside, this record is complete garbage. It’s messy, sloppy and they sound like they are either drunk off their butts playing the record or they can barely play a chord. As far as punk rock goes, try to find a band or a record that sounds like this. It’s as unique a record as you can find from the time period it came out in and when you take into account what the Mats did later on and how different they sounded, it makes this record even more of a rare classic. The record is loose, ridiculous and a ton of fun. This is rock N roll with punk, garage, booze and who knows what else thrown together and played very fast… and great.
Recommended Tracks: Johnny’s Gonna Die, Takin a Ride, Shut Up, I Hate Music, Customer, Otto
38. Talking Heads – 77: Out of that aforementioned late 70’s New York City rock scene came the Talking Heads and their unique sound. Odd but catchy they were tough to predict but easy to enjoy and this record really laid down the groundwork for a noteworthy career of unusual gems.
Recommended Tracks: Psycho Killer, Don’t Worry About the Government, Uh-Oh Love Comes to Town, and Sugar on My Tongue & I Wish That You Wouldn’t Say That (from 2005 reissue)
37. UB40 – Signing Off: When people think of UB40 they think of Red Red Wine, and even worse their cheesy poppier sounding music from the late 80’s and 90’s. On their debut record Signing Off this couldn’t be farther from the truth. The 1980 release showed an English reggae sound that was unique and powerful. With elements of Dub and political and social commentary throughout the record, Signing Off plays like a chilled out yet powerful release and made UB40 look more like a reggae version of the Clash than what they are remembered for now. It’s by far their best release and one of the best English reggae records ever.
Recommended Tracks: Tyler, Burden of Shame, King, Food For Thought, 12 Bar
36. Snoop Doggy Dogg – Doggystyle: Snoop debuted in a way many of us wish we could. He was a guest rapper on several tracks of Dr. Dre’s largely successful “The Chronic” a year or two before releasing his own record. How can you do better than that? You guest on a smash record that introduces you to the world and wets their appetite for your own work. There’s one catch though. Your record had better be good or else you would probably disappear as fast as you rose to the top. With Snoop’s Doggystyle we know what happened. He became arguably the biggest star in rap.
Recommended Tracks: Gin and Juice, Who Am I, Serial Killa, Murder Was the Case That They Gave Me, Lodi Dodi
35. The Stone Roses – Stone Roses: Quite simply this record influenced all 90’s British pop and rock music. Ian Brown’s cool vocal and the uptempo tracks were a match made on the hipster dancefloor. The Stone Roses made British music fun again and although their contributions were fairly brief, this record goes down as one of the best ever. I confess that the first time I heard this I didn’t totally “get it”, but several years later, perhaps when I had learned that British music didn’t have to be droning guitars and vocal flamboyance, I realized how great a record this is.
Recommended Tracks: I am the Resurrection, She Bangs the Drums, I Wanna Be Adored
34. Yeah Yeah Yeahs – Fever To Tell: Although they released a few small EPs prior to this, Fever To Tell marks the 1st full length record of this still improving group. The record goes all over the place with volume, depth, crashes and burns but makes up for the messiness with some amazing songs. The record starts out beating your behind and ends up making you misty. It’s a strange ride but one you won’t forget.
Recommended Tracks: Y Control, Rich, Maps, Date With the Night, Pin
33. The Jam – In The City: The Jam were very unique, even among the dozens of punk bands coming out of England in the 70’s. They were unique because they were not really a “punk” band. Yeah there were some punk rock tendencies but more often than not there were also nods to Motown and classic R&B music. The mixture of styles separated them from the pack but they still had the respect the other more conventional punk bands had. That said, In The City is a bit raw in places and shows a good balance of the potential greatness yet to come and goodness already achieved. The energy of the tracks gets you moving and in the end that’s really all that matters.
Recommended Tracks: In The City, Art School, Sounds From the Street, Non Stop Dancing
32. Arcade Fire – Funeral: This is not a record you can hear in passing. You’d be cheating yourself if that were the case. If you have not heard this record yet, you should get yourself a copy, find a place to relax, detach yourself from all distractions and get ready for the beautiful, emotional tidal wave of Funeral. This record has it all: romance, sadness, hope and power. There are catchy tunes and brilliant arrangements. The only thing you can think after experiencing this record is “where have you been all my life”. That’s it. That’s the only bad thing I can say about Funeral is that after you’ve heard it, you wish you had heard it sooner.
Recommended Tracks: Wake Up, Neighborhood #1, Rebellion, Crown of Love, Neighborhood #3
31. Weezer – Blue Album: I was attracted to this record not so much by the sounds, but from what I saw in the band’s first video for Undone, the Sweater Song. I thought wow these guys look like total nerds rocking out, and because I’ve always imagined myself as a member of Lambda Lambda Lambda I was totally into it. Plus the songs weren’t too shabby either, covering many topics I could relate to and most importantly, being catchy as hell. Many claim this record was responsible for influencing Emo which makes me cringe, but it certainly showed those in Indie rock how to Power Pop. It’s really a delicate balance to be popular with the cool kids and crossover to the mainstream no taste kids at the same time but for a short while Weezer made the leap. Inevitably scorn settled in and their 2nd record Pinkerton was panned by critics and fans alike although I consider it right there with the Blue Album in terms of quality, and THIS album has quality.
Recommended Tracks: Say it Ain’t So, Buddy Holly, My Name is Jonas, Undone-the Sweater Song, In the Garage
30. Wu Tang Clan – Enter the Wu Tang (36 Chambers): From the slums of Shaolin, the Wu Tang Clan struck hard with this influential debut. The West coast was riding high and ruling rap with Dr. Dre, Snoop, Tupac and many gangsta rappers leading the way but The Wu Tang Clan struck a blow back for the East Coast and the birthplace of hip hop with the Enter the Wu Tang. The beats were slammin but not duplicates of the G-Funk sound that was sweeping California. The Rza’s production style was a breath of fresh air and the Clan injected something back into gangsta and hardcore rap that was becoming harder to find: fun. As the 90’s went on more and more rappers talked about nothing but bitches, money and violence and the novelty of N.W.A. was replaced by the new norm and boredom. The Wu Tang took the message and evolved it, making it fun again to listen to serious hip hop. I remember many nights in the cars with friends, pumping Enter the Wu Tang and having a great time trying to solve da mystery of chessboxin.
Recommended Tracks: C.R.E.A.M., Method Man, Protect Your Neck, Da Mystery of Chessboxin, Wu Tang Clan Ain’t Nuthin to F*** With
29. The Pretenders – The Pretenders: Few bands have made a stronger opening statement than The Pretenders did on their self titled debut. They come to rock. They come to kick butt and they come to do their own thing. As evidenced by Chrissie Hynde’s unique vocal, the Pretenders and this record may sound a little like this band or that band, but it also sounds a lot like something new and different, which they were. They captured a style all their own that got them lumped in with pop bands, rock bands, punk bands and even new wave bands. Maybe they were all those things but after one listen to the raw emotion in Chrissie’s voice one has to think it doesn’t matter.
Recommended Tracks: Brass in Pocket, Mystery Achievement, Kid, Up the Neck, The Wait, Precious
28. U2 – Boy: Unfortunately when Boy came out I wasn’t really into music that much. I was probably too busy watching Scooby Doo, the Flintstones, Sesame Street, the Electric Company and Tom & Jerry to care. Eventually I started to watch Sha Na Na because my parents watched it. Then it was Solid Gold. Shortly after that I became addicted to this new thing called MTV. The first U2 video I ever saw was Sunday Bloody Sunday. From that point on I jumped aboard but by then U2 had already put out 3-4 records. After buying The Joshua Tree and finding out what an amazing album that was I started to get curious about their earliest stuff. I figured the only record of theirs I had ever heard was their best work (Joshua Tree) so to hear their first record from 6 years earlier would probably be a letdown. I thought it was their 1st time out and there’s probably a lot of growing they had to do. Then I heard Boy and realized they were pretty darn good right out of the gate. From the classic 1st track “I Will Follow” through to the end of the record, this ranks among their best.
Recommended Tracks: I Will Follow, Electric Company, Out of Control, Twilight, Another Time, Another Place
27. Coldplay – Parachutes: I worked at WBNY when this record came into rotation at the station. As I would often do, I talked with other station members about what new stuff was good and a few females mentioned this new Coldplay record. When I was next on air I played “Shiver” and never looked back. I don’t believe this record is as popular or sold as many copies as their subsequent work and that’s a shame. When I heard this record it reminded me what I liked about British pop music and why I hate Oasis. Both are British pop music but Coldplay didn’t take themselves so seriously back then unlike the Gallaghers and you can hear the difference. Plus this record actually had me forget about Radiohead for a few weeks which was saying something back then.
Recommended Tracks: Shiver, Trouble, Don’t Panic, Sparks, Yellow, High Speed
26. Pixies – Surfer Rosa: I’ll start by saying I know Come on Pilgrim came out first, but I really don’t like the idea of using EPs on my list of best debut albums so I am going with the first full length record the Pixies released, Surfer Rosa. And what a record it is! When it comes to the Pixies a lot of times I’m left to wonder, how can music so raw and unbridled be so damn catchy? That’s the magic of this band. Most of the alternative bands of the 90’s and since owe a debt of gratitude to the Pixies and it begins with this magnificent record which rips your arm off and beats you with it.
Recommended Tracks: Where is My Mind, Bone Machine, Gigantic, Vamos, Broken Face
25. Smashing Pumpkins – Gish: Before grunge and the alternative music revolution of the 90’s really kicked in a lot of bands hung under the radar receiving huge critical praise but little commercial attention. One of those bands were the Smashing Pumpkins. Now we all know that later on they blew up something fierce but back in 1991 they released their first album unnoticed by most. Back then they were only really known to college radio and the critics. Often times critically regarded bands stay under the surface and never get the public recognition but the Pumpkins kept going and eventually broke through and became massive for a few years. This debut record is no step down from the records that scored on the charts. In fact, some might argue this record is better.
Recommended Tracks: Siva, Suffer, Daydream, I am One, Bury Me
24. The Police – Outlandos de Amour: The Police were very similar to the Jam in how they separated themselves from the English punk rock pack because they were far more than that. Outlandos de Amor has some punkish sounding tunes plus a few simple sounding ones, but also some heavyweight classics. Much of the songwriting on this record is advanced for a young band hitting the scene with their first record. “Roxanne” is just too good of a song for a relatively new band to write but The Police weren’t exactly kids who hooked up in a band. All 3 members were somewhat accomplished players by the time they hooked up and it shows on this classic record.
Recommended Tracks: Roxanne, Can’t Stand Losing You, Next To You, So Lonely, Hole in My Life
23. Pavement – Slanted and Enchanted: Something you’ll notice about many of the records I have on my list is that they are genre defining records. They are albums that took elements of other styles but used them in such a unique way that they created a new genre themselves. That’s where Pavement comes in. Slanted and Enchanted helped to usher in the indie rock genre and college radio stations everywhere took notice. While too unusual to the mainstream this experimental masterpiece broke down subtle rules of song and paved new roads down which thousands of bands have followed.
Recommended Tracks: Here, Summer Babe, Conduit For Sale, Trigger Cut/Wounded Kite at:17
22. Nine Inch Nails – Pretty Hate Machine: The first time I heard this it was over my head. I wasn’t ready yet. A few years later I had the chance to listen to it again and that time it blew my mind. That probably sums up Nine Inch Nails and Trent Reznor altogether. NIN were ahead of their time. Not many records with such raw emotion are danceable but this one is. Not only that but you can break stuff to it, have relations, workout, etc. It’s an impressive and versatile debut.
Recommended Tracks: Head Like a Hole, Down in It, Terrible Lie, Sin, Something I Can Never Have
21. The Velvet Underground & Nico - The Velvet Underground & Nico: This was another record I didn’t discover until the last decade. Some would say when you discover something that moment must be the right time because that’s when you discovered it, but damn if I don’t feel guilty about not hearing this one sooner. There are so many different types of songs on this record it’s no wonder it was so influential to bands of many genres. Ah, the advantages of having an artist like Andy Warhol as your “producer”. You think someone like Warhol is going to a tell you to tweak songs, or to go for more continuity on the record? The Velvet Underground and Nico is one of the most “free” records you’ll ever hear.
Recommended Tracks: Heroin, I’m Waiting for the Man, All Tomorrow’s Parties, Femme Fatale, There She Goes Again,
20. Violent Femmes – Violent Femmes: When punk rock met folk. The Violent Femmes sounded new and unique at the time and if you listen to this record now, 25+ years later, you might feel the same way. I mean, who sounds like these guys did, especially on this record? There are more timeless classics here than some groups’ greatest hits compilations. Gordon Gano’s voice really drives the record and sets the tone for the angst ridden and self depreciating songs. Even the use of vulgarity is done in a cool and not gratuitous manner. Well before “alternative” music came to prominence in the 90’s this record captured the essence of the sound and deserved a debt of gratitude as one of first and one of the best.
Recommended Tracks: Blister in the Sun, Kiss Off, Gimme The Car, Add it Up, Gone Daddy Gone
19. Blondie – Blondie: Right in the heart of the New York City new wave/rock scene was the attitude of Debbie Harry and Blondie. They weren’t as tough or played as fast as some other bands in the scene but their artistic sensibility was exceptional. More often than not, they knew just how poppy, just how dancey and just how punk rock to be. They knew how to mix genres and styles. They made up for their lack of edginess with an abundance of coolness. How’d they do it? It began and ended with Harry, who was as believable as a sweet girl as she was as someone who shouldn’t be trifled with. Her ability to blow kisses and snarl when needed made her not only a very effective singer but also a huge sex symbol of the late 70’s and early 80’s. That combination of sex appeal and grit is on full display on this fantastic debut.
Recommended Tracks: In The Flesh, Rip Her to Shreds, X Offender, Kung Fu Girls, Look Good in Blue
18. A Tribe Called Quest – People’s Instinctive Travels and the Paths of Rhythm: While not the first of the abstract hip hop bands to emerge from the east coast in the late 80’s, A Tribe Called Quest might be the Best. The Jazz samples, the clever rhymes, and the courage to experiment became calling cards for ATCQ and it’s all on display here. Plus you get the legendary balance and flow of Phife and Q-Tip, whose contrasting but similar styles meshed perfectly. There’s love, humor, social awareness and the type of bragging we are all used to in rap music with none of the thug, pimp or jerk stuff. What more do you need?
Recommended Tracks: Bonita Applebaum, Can I Kick It, I Left My Wallet in El Segundo, Ham n Eggs, Push it Along, Public Enemy
17. The Cars – The Cars: First you take the New Wave sound that is blowing up all over the east coast, then you take some good ol’ rock n roll which never goes out of style and add them together. What the Cars got from that formula was one of the great debuts ever. Every track on this record is good. How many bands can say that about their records let alone their first? The whole album is feel good, hanging with your friends type of music and plays as well today as it did over 30 years ago.
Recommended Tracks: Just What I Needed, Bye Bye Love, My Best Friend’s Girl, Good Times Roll, Moving in Stereo, Don’t Cha Stop
16. Television – Marquee Moon: If you are a fan of drugs and guitars, you might have heard of this record. Actually that’s not fair, as I only like guitars and I have it. That goes to show you the far reaching beauty of this classic debut release. The songs are not just songs, they are art and the extended bouts of guitar are not bothersome but awesome. Maybe the fact that Television dissolved shortly after helped to cultivate the legend but the small body of work the band left behind may be as creative or brilliant as anything any band has ever done.
Recommended Tracks: See No Evil, Marquee Moon, Friction, Venus
15. Ben Folds Five- Ben Folds Five: Much like Weezer impacted the nerds of the world, Ben Folds Five reached out to a similar demographic. Nerds, Geeks and Dweebs of all shapes and sizes chuckled at the witty lyrics and playful delivery of Ben Folds Five. Needless to say BFF didn’t achieve nearly the success and acclaim as Weezer did but on the bright side, that made them cooler for me. Plus while I think Weezer sometimes catered to pop culture, especially during the last decade, Ben only caters to himself and his own experiences. The songwriting on this record are on topics I relate to, understand and find extremely interesting. Plus it seems like there’s a little Elton John, Violent Femmes and They Might Be Giants in there, and if there is how can you complain about that? Ben’s smart-alecky yet non-obnoxiously delivered lyrics entertain and inform and the guitarless band proves a fun and still rocking sound on this debut.
Recommended Tracks: Philosophy, Underground, Julianne, Best Imitation of Myself, Where’s Summer B, Uncle Walter
14. Bruce Springsteen – Greetings From Asbury Park NJ: Here’s a record I didn’t actually hear until this past year (shame on me) but wow, what a great one. Something that is remarkable about this record and that is remarkable about pretty much every one on my list is that the music is so good, so advanced and so right that it is hard in most cases to believe that this is that artist’s first release. Bruce is light years ahead of 99.9% of debut songwriters on this 1st release. He started out way in front and stayed ahead of the pack for most of his career.
Recommended Tracks: Growin Up, It’s Hard to be a Saint in the City, Mary Queen of Arkansas, Blinded By the Light
13. The Clash – The Clash: This is one steady debut all the way through. It kicks your teeth down your throat with the first track, “Clash City Rockers” and continues to do so until the end. There’s fire and passion in abundance and they are just scratching the surface. I think on later records they became more focused in terms of where the fire and passion would go but on this record they are still at their best, just in a more raw way.
Recommended Tracks: White Riot, Clash City Rockers, Police and Thieves, Complete Control, Career Opportunities
12. Pink Floyd – Piper at the Gates of Dawn: This is one of those albums that blows people’s minds. It certainly blew the doors off of rock music and sent it in a new direction. Yeah the record sounds British but to compare this album to stuff that came out at the same time by The Beatles, Rolling Stones, The Who or anyone else is not valid… that’s how unique and distinctive the Pink Floyd sound is. The lyrics are beyond pop music. The guitar work and song structure or lack thereof was very creative and they still managed to have a top 10 album in the UK out of it. When you can be experimental and still very successful, that’s when you know you have something.
Recommended Tracks: See Emily Play, Astronomy Domine, Interstellar Overdrive, Bike, Lucifer Sam
11. New Order – Movement: If you know the history of the band, listening to this record is like listening to a haunting. The band was obviously still reeling from the loss of former singer Ian Curtis and this was the first step without him. The tracks are sad and yet darkly beautiful at the same time, a quality often shared by the Joy Division work. While not an overly long record, there’s plenty of quality to make up for the lack of quantity.
Recommended Tracks: Dreams Never End, I.C.B., Denial, Truth
10. The Smiths – The Smiths: How did British Rock music move from New Wave in the mid-80’s to Brit Pop, Shoegazer and the British Rock that dominated the 90’s? It was mostly The Smiths. They bridged the gap and created something that was imitated right away and very often, even deep into the 90’s. Many of the songs sounded like real art and Morrissey had a hypnotic voice capable of locking you in and making you a believer. For their existence The Smiths wrote a ton of excellent songs and this album like every other Smiths album is full of them.
Recommended Tracks: This Charming Man, Hand in Glove, What Difference Does it Make, Pretty Girls Make Graves
9. Bjork – Debut: When I think of the 90’s musically and what was excellent about it, I can’t help but think of Bjork. For a long while in that decade I was only into the male stuff: Nirvana, Beastie Boys, Violent Femmes, N.W.A, Beck, Tribe Called Quest, etc. but at some point I began to get a little curious. I got curious about this new stuff the ladies were listening to. I started to check out Tori Amos, PJ Harvey, and Bjork. Of the 3, and all 3 are great, I like Bjork best. I’d put on Debut and it’s like a big goofy smile for an hour. That’s what I’m talking about.
Recommended Tracks: Big Time Sensuality, Venus as a Boy, Human Behaviour, One Day, Violently Happy
8. Joy Division – Unknown Pleasures: Listening to this record should really be done with your eyes closed. If you let it, this album can take you away into a dreamworld the likes of which you never knew. I mean it. You should do this at night, turn the lights down, make sure you are alone or with people who will be silent, close your eyes and flip this on. It’s dreaming without being sleep. It is dark and wonderful.
Recommended Tracks: She’s Lost Control, Shadowplay, Insight, Disorder, Wilderness
7. Beastie Boys – License to Ill: It was inevitable right? With Run DMC and others emerging and beginning to put rap music on the map, it was only a matter of time that a novelty act emerged to help crossover the rap genre onto the pop charts. In this case the novelty was that these were 3 white guys but unlike nearly every novelty act that entered the genre afterward, these guys had the skills, charisma and style to pull it off for the long haul. Def Jam could have put any mediocre white rapper group together and they might have scored a hit and got white kids all over the burbs to buy their record but because the Beasties had the skills they not only scored a hit, they scored a monster #1 smash and a lengthy, noteworthy career. While their later work is more critically acclaimed, this record is pure fun.
Recommended Tracks: Fight For Your Right To Party, Brass Monkey, Girls, Paul Revere, Hold it Now Hit It, The New Style
6. Beck – Mellow Gold: I remember asking questions when “Loser” hit the airways: Who is this “loser“ guy? Are all his songs like this one? The answers are I still don’t know who he is and no, his songs are not like Loser. Over the course of his career Beck has experimented and tapped into so many genres that it’s hard to classify him. I believe Mellow Gold fell under the umbrella of Alternative because it was tough to figure out and consequently this record put a reluctant Beck as the figurehead of Generation X. When you hear all the work he’s done over the years this record isn’t that much of a surprise but consider those of us who heard this back when it came out and this is all we knew of him. We were scratching our heads but thoroughly fascinated. The record is creative and fresh and schizophrenic… but in a good way.
Recommended Tracks: Beer Can, Loser, Nitemare Hippie Girl, Pay No Mind, Soul Sucking Jerk
5. Doors – The Doors: "If the doors of perception were cleansed every thing would appear to man as it is, infinite. For man has closed himself up, till he sees all things through narrow chinks of his cavern." -Aldous Huxley. I didn’t hear this record until the early 90’s but once I did I couldn’t stop listening to it. To an 18 year old who is just finding himself, “The Doors” is like crack. Their redefinition of blues rock was unparalleled and combined with the lyrical content of the great poet Jim Morrison with his raw and passionate delivery made for one of the most explosive debut records of all time. Half the songs on this record are some of the best rock songs of all time. How many records, let alone debut records can make such a claim?
Recommended Tracks: Light My Fire, The End, Break on Through, End of the Night, Whiskey Bar
4. Elvis Costello – My Aim is True: Much like Beck but to a lesser extent, Elvis Costello sampled a lot of styles on the way to finding his own. Depending on which track you listen to you can hear traces of punk, folk, twang, new wave and even a little reggae. Even better than his multi-dimensional music style is his lyrical content and delivery. The lyrics are clever and well written with a sarcastic or maybe cynical streak and the vocal delivery is simply legendary.
Recommended Tracks: Alison, Watching the Detectives, Less Than Zero, Miracle Man, (The Angels Want to Wear My) Red Shoes
3. Jeff Buckley – Grace: Listening to the record the first time was reminiscent of the first time I had candy. I wasn’t sure what it was that I had just ingested but it was sweet, great and I had a natural attraction and strong feeling that it would become a permanent part of my life. This and Portishead’s Dummy are my go to albums when I am sad. I think that the tragic death of Buckley before releasing his 2nd record makes this album even more dramatic and more melancholy than it would have been received and remembered otherwise. His voice is quite possibly the best male voice I’ve ever heard in pop music and we will always be left wondering what might have been.
Recommended Tracks: Hallelujah, Lover You Should Have Come Over, Grace, Last Goodbye, Mojo Pin, Forget Her (added on as 11th track on reissues)
2. Portishead – Dummy: Speaking of Portishead’s Dummy, it grabs my #2 spot. This groundbreaking record has every thing I love in music: moody lyrics, strings, beats, razor sharp guitar riffs and a classic female vocal. They took all those things and melded it into a beautiful debut record. Nearly every song on this is a classic and still play as fresh and amazing as they did 15 years ago. This is one of those rare instances where a whole lot of good things are mixed together to make something greater. Too often we take good things, combine them with other good things and have less than good results but with Portishead and this record, it’s like Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups all around. This record is on my if you were stranded on a desert island and you could only take 5 CDs with you list.
Recommended Tracks: Glory Box, Numb, Strangers, Roads, Wandering Star, Mysterons, Sour Times
1. Guns N Roses - Appetite For Destruction: Once upon a time I was writing the names of bands like Cinderella, Def Leppard, and Ratt on my trapper keeper. I ate up all those power ballads and glam metal rock songs. Then one day I heard Appetite For Destruction. A short time later when my butt healed after Guns N Roses had whooped it, I began one of the most important musical journeys of my life when I realized there was more to life than Poison and there was certainly more to rock than Bon Jovi. Guns N Roses broke the chains that bound me to glam metal and from there, once free, I began to test the waters of hip hop, classic rock, alternative and later on indie rock, electronica, and underground things. It’s all because of this record. It takes no prisoners. Thank you Izzy Stradlin!
Recommended Tracks: Welcome to the Jungle, Paradise City, Sweet Child O’ Mine, Mr Brownstone, Out Ta Get Me
Introduction: Welcome to my top 50 Debut Records. There are several things to keep in mind: The first is this is my list, so my rules. Secondly, I appreciate feedback but not things like “your list is stupid”. If you disagree with any placements or omissions, tell me what you’d do different and why. Lastly remember, there are NO RIGHT answers, it’s all relative and it’s all good. If Kenny Loggins floats your boat, that’s wonderful. Music is amazing in that it means so much to so many and very impressively, it brings us together. In fact, if you made a list of the top 10 things that bring us together, you’d find so many negative events like war, violence, hatred, or tragedy. Music may be the number one positive thing that brings all of us together!
I know what you are thinking; Ed, why are you doing this? My first reason is because I feel like it. I often live in the moment and at the moment I started this it seemed like the thing to do. Secondly, I’m doing this because I am interested how people feel after seeing this list. Do you agree, disagree? Did I leave something out? I like the discussion. Thirdly, I want to come back to this list a few years from now and see what I think then. Every week I discover some new band or record and I’m sure if I did this list even 3 months from now there would be noticeable changes. I always like looking back at things I wrote in the past and thinking what a tool I am. Do you do that? Do you look at your previous writing, or your previous work and think what was I thinking? I always believe that we are our wisest, smartest and awesomest at this moment. We are so much more awesome than we were yesterday. We are wiser and smarter too. So looking back at this list down the road might be as much fun as putting it together now.
This took me 3-4 weeks of research, listening, re-listening, and love. I’d work on a little bit each day and finally it’s done. So Let’s Get it Started!
Preface:
Before we begin with the actual list here are things you WON’T find on this list:
-Debut records I don’t know or haven’t heard so I can’t in good conscience put them on this list. Maybe I’ll get to them one day and they’ll crack a future list.
Apologies to: the Beatles, The Who, the Stones, MC5, Bob Dylan, the Band, Beach Boys, Black Sabbath, Love, Big Star, Cream, Traffic, Roxy Music, Booker T & the MGs, Cheap Trick, Genesis, Queen, The Ramones, Elvis, etc.
-Great bands/Artists with so-so debut records who got better as they went along:
Way to pace yourselves: Radiohead, Prince, Wilco, David Bowie, Alanis Morissette (Jagged Little Pill was her 3rd record), Feist, Sloan, Spoon, Stereolab, Andrew Bird, Ani DiFranco, Flaming Lips, T.Rex, Green Day (Dookie was their 3rd record), White Stripes, Billy Joel, Bob Marley & the Wailers and on and on.
-Some bands who won’t make this list simply because I don’t like them (remember my list, my rules):
Gets the Gas Face: Pearl Jam, Led Zeppelin, Aerosmith, CCR, Black Crowes, Oasis.
Honorable Mention: Good debut records that didn’t quite make the cut: (they get lovely parting gifts)
• De La Soul – 3 Feet High and Rising
• Sade – Diamond Life
• The Beta Band – The Three EPs
• Dr. Dre – The Chronic
• REM – Murmur
• Tori Amos – Little Earthquakes
• Doves – Lost Souls
• Super Furry Animals – Fuzzy Logic
• Stray Cats – Stray Cats
• Maxwell – Maxwell’s Urban Hang Suite
• Kool and the Gang – Kool and the Gang
• Modern Lovers – The Modern Lovers
• Eminem – The Slim Shady LP
• Fugazi – Repeater
• Postal Service – Give Up
• Curtis Mayfield- Curtis
• Massive Attack – Blue Lines
• St. Vincent- Marry Me
• D’Angelo – Brown Sugar
• AC/DC- T.N.T.
• ABC – The Lexicon of Love
• NAS – Illmatic
• Morrissey – Viva Hate
• Wire – Pink Flag
• Gang of Four – Entertainment!
• Daft Punk – Homework
• 3rd Bass – The Cactus Album
• Nirvana – Bleach
• Barenaked Ladies – Gordon
• Le Tigre – Le Tigre
• Lenny Kravitz – Let Love Rule
• LL Cool J- Radio
• Alicia Keys – Songs in A Minor
• Norah Jones – Come Away With Me
• Jimi Hendrix – Are You Experienced?
• PJ Harvey – Dry
• N.W.A. – N.W.A and the Posse
• Interpol – Turn on the Bright Lights
• Echo & the Bunnymen- Crocodiles
• Depeche Mode – Speak & Spell
• Run DMC – Run DMC
• Bloc Party – Silent Alarm
• Modest Mouse - This Is a Long Drive for Someone with Nothing to Think About
• Gorillaz – Gorillaz
• Poe – Hello
Without any further ado
My 50 Best Debut Albums:
50. Stone Temple Pilots – Core: One of the things I disliked about “grunge” was how murky it felt. I didn’t like a lot of the bands that came out of the Seattle scene and the primary reason was that it seemed too much kind of like how once upon a time Slayer was a little too much for me but Motley Crue was just fine. In that same vein, while Soundgarden, Alice in Chains, Pearl Jam and many others didn’t do it for me, Stone Temple Pilots seemed like a breath of fresh air in a smoky room. It felt like grunge without the grunge. Unlike most of those bands this had a bit of glam, finish and style to it and whether or not that was Scott Weiland’s fault, I don’t know but this unlike those other records clicked with me and remains a classic.
Recommended Tracks: Plush, Creep, Wicked Garden, Dead & Bloated, Sex Type Thing
49. The The – Soul Mining: An ex-girlfriend introduced me to Matt Johnson aka The The about 10 years ago. This is one of those bands a lot of people don’t know about and for good reason. Matt has always maintained a pretty low profile and his penchant for experimenting with everything from country to dark dance music makes it harder to put a name to the beat, so to speak. Many The The records are very different from the one before it which makes it hard to build a fanbase. To make a long story short, if you were going to buy one start with their/his official debut Soul Mining. The record is dancing in the rain, skipping in the sunshine and laying in the grass without a care in the world. This record is fun but not outrageous fun, it’s more the kind that will just put a big smile on your face for a while. The dancey pop music has a bit of darkness to it, but that’s what makes it so attractive.
Recommended Tracks: Uncertain Smile, This is the Day, Perfect, Giant
48. Whiskeytown – Faithless Street: In the footsteps of Uncle Tupelo, the Replacements and Bruce Springsteen came Ryan Adams and Whiskeytown. This was alternative country as it was called back then but it had an edginess to it due to Adams’ powerful and passionate delivery. This is down home warm weather late afternoon music for people who can appreciate the balance of rock and country and not want to sleep with their relatives.
Recommended Tracks: Midway Park, Top Dollar, Here’s To The Rest of the World, Faithless Street, Empty Baseball Park, Yesterday’s News
47. Sex Pistols – Nevermind the Bollocks, Here’s The Sex Pistols: This is the record your mother warned you about. It’s full of angst, anger and venom and one listen is all it takes to know this is an important album. The first time I listened to this all the way through I was so energized I wanted to go outside, break stuff and bring anarchy to my neighborhood. Instead I probably got together with a friend or two and talked a lot of crap about breaking things and probably brought anarchy to the Pizza Hut buffet.
Recommended Tracks: God Save the Queen, Submission, Anarchy in the U.K., Pretty Vacant, Holidays in the Sun
46. Jesus & Mary Chain – Psycho Candy: You know this is a fine debut record when you consider the 1st track on this 1st record could very well be their best song! Psycho Candy is probably one of the most influential records you’ve never heard as the impact was well below the radar but important nonetheless. Bands like Mazzy Star and My Bloody Valentine may never have existed without this band and this record.
Recommended Tracks: Just Like Honey, Never Understand, The Living End, Taste of Cindy
45. Funkadelic – Funkadelic: Before the mothership landed on planet Earth and before Parliament smoothed out the funk sound, Funkadelic led one nation under a groove that just happened to get down for the funk of it. If you heard this record you might be a little surprised. It’s not the George Clinton you came to know much later on. This record brings the funk but also packs a soulful punch, perhaps due to the time (1970) and that George wasn’t too far removed from a soul/doo wop group himself. You can hear the formula for funk starting to come together and this record started a run of 3 great Funkadelic records in a row through Maggot Brain.
Recommended Tracks: I Got a Thing, I Bet You, Mommy What’s a Funkadelic, Good Old Music
44. Lauryn Hill – The Miseducation of Lauryn Hill: When Lauryn left the Fugees there wasn’t too much expected. Everyone assumed Wyclef and Pras were the primary creative forces behind that group and Lauryn was simply a voice and not the big time talent she proved to be. Credit Lauryn with bridging the gap between hip hop and soul. This record had me nodding my head the way I would listening to a hip hop record.
Recommended Tracks: Doo Wap, Everything is Everything, Sweetest Thing, Ex-Factor
43. G Love & Special Sauce – G Love & Special Sauce: When I first heard G Love and Special Sauce it was on a very early Late Night with Conan O’Brien. They performed “Baby’s Got Sauce” from this 1st record. I thought man this was a band that was having fun and doing it cool. I became an instant fan and remained so throughout the 90’s until their later work started to slip and I lost interest. Above, I have a small list of bands or artists whose first record was ordinary and the greatness came later. These guys were the opposite. Their first record was great. The second was good. The third was fine. The 4th was okay and so on. The bluesy hip hop style is perfect for a summer night with friends or any chilled out occasion.
Recommended Tracks: The Things I Used To Do, Garbage Man, Blues Music, Baby’s Got Sauce, Cold Beverage
42. Ryan Adams – Heartbreaker: When Whiskeytown dissolved I was just getting into them and then to find out they were no more, well I was not pleased but when I heard Heartbreaker I knew everything was going to be alright. Ryan matched all the Whiskeytown efforts with Heartbreaker and even broke new ground as a songwriter with somewhat hopeful tones on a few tracks. Upon hearing this you could tell this was the beginning of something big and 10 records later this prolific and talented artist continues to grow.
Recommended Tracks: To Be Young, Why Do They Leave, Oh My Sweet Carolina, Come Pick Me Up, My Winding Wheel
41. Public Enemy – Yo Bum Rush the Show: P.E. exploded onto the scene in 1987 and in doing so ripped hip hop and rap music off the road it was on and sent it into a whole new direction. With Chuck D.’s relentless rhymes and delivery and Flavor Flav adding his spastic takes on the tracks, this was the future revealed. You could tell 2 things about Public Enemy by listening to this record: 1- They were among the most important voices in rap right out of the gate and 2- They were only scratching the surface of their skills. When the next record came out we expected it to be better and it was. This was a truly important group, especially during the first 10 years of their career.
Recommended Tracks: Public Enemy #1, Miuzi Weighs a Ton, Timebomb, You’re Gonna Get Yours
40. Strokes – Is This It: One of the newest records on my list. You have to keep in mind that it’s tough to take a recent debut record and say it’s one of the best ever. Part of what makes a record great is staying power and how it sounds years after the initial buzz and novelty has worn off. That’s why a record from 2001 is being considered a recent one on a list like this. Recapturing the late 70’s New York city rock scene, The Strokes perfected the sound. There was a lot of hype surrounding this record and it was well deserved, even converting the non-believers after they took a full listen. This record was just too good for the first time out and while they released 2 solid records later, they were never able to catch the magic in a bottle they had with Is This It.
Recommended Tracks: Someday, Take it or Leave It, Last Nite, The Modern Age
39. Replacements- Sorry Ma, Forgot to Take Out the Trash: All puns aside, this record is complete garbage. It’s messy, sloppy and they sound like they are either drunk off their butts playing the record or they can barely play a chord. As far as punk rock goes, try to find a band or a record that sounds like this. It’s as unique a record as you can find from the time period it came out in and when you take into account what the Mats did later on and how different they sounded, it makes this record even more of a rare classic. The record is loose, ridiculous and a ton of fun. This is rock N roll with punk, garage, booze and who knows what else thrown together and played very fast… and great.
Recommended Tracks: Johnny’s Gonna Die, Takin a Ride, Shut Up, I Hate Music, Customer, Otto
38. Talking Heads – 77: Out of that aforementioned late 70’s New York City rock scene came the Talking Heads and their unique sound. Odd but catchy they were tough to predict but easy to enjoy and this record really laid down the groundwork for a noteworthy career of unusual gems.
Recommended Tracks: Psycho Killer, Don’t Worry About the Government, Uh-Oh Love Comes to Town, and Sugar on My Tongue & I Wish That You Wouldn’t Say That (from 2005 reissue)
37. UB40 – Signing Off: When people think of UB40 they think of Red Red Wine, and even worse their cheesy poppier sounding music from the late 80’s and 90’s. On their debut record Signing Off this couldn’t be farther from the truth. The 1980 release showed an English reggae sound that was unique and powerful. With elements of Dub and political and social commentary throughout the record, Signing Off plays like a chilled out yet powerful release and made UB40 look more like a reggae version of the Clash than what they are remembered for now. It’s by far their best release and one of the best English reggae records ever.
Recommended Tracks: Tyler, Burden of Shame, King, Food For Thought, 12 Bar
36. Snoop Doggy Dogg – Doggystyle: Snoop debuted in a way many of us wish we could. He was a guest rapper on several tracks of Dr. Dre’s largely successful “The Chronic” a year or two before releasing his own record. How can you do better than that? You guest on a smash record that introduces you to the world and wets their appetite for your own work. There’s one catch though. Your record had better be good or else you would probably disappear as fast as you rose to the top. With Snoop’s Doggystyle we know what happened. He became arguably the biggest star in rap.
Recommended Tracks: Gin and Juice, Who Am I, Serial Killa, Murder Was the Case That They Gave Me, Lodi Dodi
35. The Stone Roses – Stone Roses: Quite simply this record influenced all 90’s British pop and rock music. Ian Brown’s cool vocal and the uptempo tracks were a match made on the hipster dancefloor. The Stone Roses made British music fun again and although their contributions were fairly brief, this record goes down as one of the best ever. I confess that the first time I heard this I didn’t totally “get it”, but several years later, perhaps when I had learned that British music didn’t have to be droning guitars and vocal flamboyance, I realized how great a record this is.
Recommended Tracks: I am the Resurrection, She Bangs the Drums, I Wanna Be Adored
34. Yeah Yeah Yeahs – Fever To Tell: Although they released a few small EPs prior to this, Fever To Tell marks the 1st full length record of this still improving group. The record goes all over the place with volume, depth, crashes and burns but makes up for the messiness with some amazing songs. The record starts out beating your behind and ends up making you misty. It’s a strange ride but one you won’t forget.
Recommended Tracks: Y Control, Rich, Maps, Date With the Night, Pin
33. The Jam – In The City: The Jam were very unique, even among the dozens of punk bands coming out of England in the 70’s. They were unique because they were not really a “punk” band. Yeah there were some punk rock tendencies but more often than not there were also nods to Motown and classic R&B music. The mixture of styles separated them from the pack but they still had the respect the other more conventional punk bands had. That said, In The City is a bit raw in places and shows a good balance of the potential greatness yet to come and goodness already achieved. The energy of the tracks gets you moving and in the end that’s really all that matters.
Recommended Tracks: In The City, Art School, Sounds From the Street, Non Stop Dancing
32. Arcade Fire – Funeral: This is not a record you can hear in passing. You’d be cheating yourself if that were the case. If you have not heard this record yet, you should get yourself a copy, find a place to relax, detach yourself from all distractions and get ready for the beautiful, emotional tidal wave of Funeral. This record has it all: romance, sadness, hope and power. There are catchy tunes and brilliant arrangements. The only thing you can think after experiencing this record is “where have you been all my life”. That’s it. That’s the only bad thing I can say about Funeral is that after you’ve heard it, you wish you had heard it sooner.
Recommended Tracks: Wake Up, Neighborhood #1, Rebellion, Crown of Love, Neighborhood #3
31. Weezer – Blue Album: I was attracted to this record not so much by the sounds, but from what I saw in the band’s first video for Undone, the Sweater Song. I thought wow these guys look like total nerds rocking out, and because I’ve always imagined myself as a member of Lambda Lambda Lambda I was totally into it. Plus the songs weren’t too shabby either, covering many topics I could relate to and most importantly, being catchy as hell. Many claim this record was responsible for influencing Emo which makes me cringe, but it certainly showed those in Indie rock how to Power Pop. It’s really a delicate balance to be popular with the cool kids and crossover to the mainstream no taste kids at the same time but for a short while Weezer made the leap. Inevitably scorn settled in and their 2nd record Pinkerton was panned by critics and fans alike although I consider it right there with the Blue Album in terms of quality, and THIS album has quality.
Recommended Tracks: Say it Ain’t So, Buddy Holly, My Name is Jonas, Undone-the Sweater Song, In the Garage
30. Wu Tang Clan – Enter the Wu Tang (36 Chambers): From the slums of Shaolin, the Wu Tang Clan struck hard with this influential debut. The West coast was riding high and ruling rap with Dr. Dre, Snoop, Tupac and many gangsta rappers leading the way but The Wu Tang Clan struck a blow back for the East Coast and the birthplace of hip hop with the Enter the Wu Tang. The beats were slammin but not duplicates of the G-Funk sound that was sweeping California. The Rza’s production style was a breath of fresh air and the Clan injected something back into gangsta and hardcore rap that was becoming harder to find: fun. As the 90’s went on more and more rappers talked about nothing but bitches, money and violence and the novelty of N.W.A. was replaced by the new norm and boredom. The Wu Tang took the message and evolved it, making it fun again to listen to serious hip hop. I remember many nights in the cars with friends, pumping Enter the Wu Tang and having a great time trying to solve da mystery of chessboxin.
Recommended Tracks: C.R.E.A.M., Method Man, Protect Your Neck, Da Mystery of Chessboxin, Wu Tang Clan Ain’t Nuthin to F*** With
29. The Pretenders – The Pretenders: Few bands have made a stronger opening statement than The Pretenders did on their self titled debut. They come to rock. They come to kick butt and they come to do their own thing. As evidenced by Chrissie Hynde’s unique vocal, the Pretenders and this record may sound a little like this band or that band, but it also sounds a lot like something new and different, which they were. They captured a style all their own that got them lumped in with pop bands, rock bands, punk bands and even new wave bands. Maybe they were all those things but after one listen to the raw emotion in Chrissie’s voice one has to think it doesn’t matter.
Recommended Tracks: Brass in Pocket, Mystery Achievement, Kid, Up the Neck, The Wait, Precious
28. U2 – Boy: Unfortunately when Boy came out I wasn’t really into music that much. I was probably too busy watching Scooby Doo, the Flintstones, Sesame Street, the Electric Company and Tom & Jerry to care. Eventually I started to watch Sha Na Na because my parents watched it. Then it was Solid Gold. Shortly after that I became addicted to this new thing called MTV. The first U2 video I ever saw was Sunday Bloody Sunday. From that point on I jumped aboard but by then U2 had already put out 3-4 records. After buying The Joshua Tree and finding out what an amazing album that was I started to get curious about their earliest stuff. I figured the only record of theirs I had ever heard was their best work (Joshua Tree) so to hear their first record from 6 years earlier would probably be a letdown. I thought it was their 1st time out and there’s probably a lot of growing they had to do. Then I heard Boy and realized they were pretty darn good right out of the gate. From the classic 1st track “I Will Follow” through to the end of the record, this ranks among their best.
Recommended Tracks: I Will Follow, Electric Company, Out of Control, Twilight, Another Time, Another Place
27. Coldplay – Parachutes: I worked at WBNY when this record came into rotation at the station. As I would often do, I talked with other station members about what new stuff was good and a few females mentioned this new Coldplay record. When I was next on air I played “Shiver” and never looked back. I don’t believe this record is as popular or sold as many copies as their subsequent work and that’s a shame. When I heard this record it reminded me what I liked about British pop music and why I hate Oasis. Both are British pop music but Coldplay didn’t take themselves so seriously back then unlike the Gallaghers and you can hear the difference. Plus this record actually had me forget about Radiohead for a few weeks which was saying something back then.
Recommended Tracks: Shiver, Trouble, Don’t Panic, Sparks, Yellow, High Speed
26. Pixies – Surfer Rosa: I’ll start by saying I know Come on Pilgrim came out first, but I really don’t like the idea of using EPs on my list of best debut albums so I am going with the first full length record the Pixies released, Surfer Rosa. And what a record it is! When it comes to the Pixies a lot of times I’m left to wonder, how can music so raw and unbridled be so damn catchy? That’s the magic of this band. Most of the alternative bands of the 90’s and since owe a debt of gratitude to the Pixies and it begins with this magnificent record which rips your arm off and beats you with it.
Recommended Tracks: Where is My Mind, Bone Machine, Gigantic, Vamos, Broken Face
25. Smashing Pumpkins – Gish: Before grunge and the alternative music revolution of the 90’s really kicked in a lot of bands hung under the radar receiving huge critical praise but little commercial attention. One of those bands were the Smashing Pumpkins. Now we all know that later on they blew up something fierce but back in 1991 they released their first album unnoticed by most. Back then they were only really known to college radio and the critics. Often times critically regarded bands stay under the surface and never get the public recognition but the Pumpkins kept going and eventually broke through and became massive for a few years. This debut record is no step down from the records that scored on the charts. In fact, some might argue this record is better.
Recommended Tracks: Siva, Suffer, Daydream, I am One, Bury Me
24. The Police – Outlandos de Amour: The Police were very similar to the Jam in how they separated themselves from the English punk rock pack because they were far more than that. Outlandos de Amor has some punkish sounding tunes plus a few simple sounding ones, but also some heavyweight classics. Much of the songwriting on this record is advanced for a young band hitting the scene with their first record. “Roxanne” is just too good of a song for a relatively new band to write but The Police weren’t exactly kids who hooked up in a band. All 3 members were somewhat accomplished players by the time they hooked up and it shows on this classic record.
Recommended Tracks: Roxanne, Can’t Stand Losing You, Next To You, So Lonely, Hole in My Life
23. Pavement – Slanted and Enchanted: Something you’ll notice about many of the records I have on my list is that they are genre defining records. They are albums that took elements of other styles but used them in such a unique way that they created a new genre themselves. That’s where Pavement comes in. Slanted and Enchanted helped to usher in the indie rock genre and college radio stations everywhere took notice. While too unusual to the mainstream this experimental masterpiece broke down subtle rules of song and paved new roads down which thousands of bands have followed.
Recommended Tracks: Here, Summer Babe, Conduit For Sale, Trigger Cut/Wounded Kite at:17
22. Nine Inch Nails – Pretty Hate Machine: The first time I heard this it was over my head. I wasn’t ready yet. A few years later I had the chance to listen to it again and that time it blew my mind. That probably sums up Nine Inch Nails and Trent Reznor altogether. NIN were ahead of their time. Not many records with such raw emotion are danceable but this one is. Not only that but you can break stuff to it, have relations, workout, etc. It’s an impressive and versatile debut.
Recommended Tracks: Head Like a Hole, Down in It, Terrible Lie, Sin, Something I Can Never Have
21. The Velvet Underground & Nico - The Velvet Underground & Nico: This was another record I didn’t discover until the last decade. Some would say when you discover something that moment must be the right time because that’s when you discovered it, but damn if I don’t feel guilty about not hearing this one sooner. There are so many different types of songs on this record it’s no wonder it was so influential to bands of many genres. Ah, the advantages of having an artist like Andy Warhol as your “producer”. You think someone like Warhol is going to a tell you to tweak songs, or to go for more continuity on the record? The Velvet Underground and Nico is one of the most “free” records you’ll ever hear.
Recommended Tracks: Heroin, I’m Waiting for the Man, All Tomorrow’s Parties, Femme Fatale, There She Goes Again,
20. Violent Femmes – Violent Femmes: When punk rock met folk. The Violent Femmes sounded new and unique at the time and if you listen to this record now, 25+ years later, you might feel the same way. I mean, who sounds like these guys did, especially on this record? There are more timeless classics here than some groups’ greatest hits compilations. Gordon Gano’s voice really drives the record and sets the tone for the angst ridden and self depreciating songs. Even the use of vulgarity is done in a cool and not gratuitous manner. Well before “alternative” music came to prominence in the 90’s this record captured the essence of the sound and deserved a debt of gratitude as one of first and one of the best.
Recommended Tracks: Blister in the Sun, Kiss Off, Gimme The Car, Add it Up, Gone Daddy Gone
19. Blondie – Blondie: Right in the heart of the New York City new wave/rock scene was the attitude of Debbie Harry and Blondie. They weren’t as tough or played as fast as some other bands in the scene but their artistic sensibility was exceptional. More often than not, they knew just how poppy, just how dancey and just how punk rock to be. They knew how to mix genres and styles. They made up for their lack of edginess with an abundance of coolness. How’d they do it? It began and ended with Harry, who was as believable as a sweet girl as she was as someone who shouldn’t be trifled with. Her ability to blow kisses and snarl when needed made her not only a very effective singer but also a huge sex symbol of the late 70’s and early 80’s. That combination of sex appeal and grit is on full display on this fantastic debut.
Recommended Tracks: In The Flesh, Rip Her to Shreds, X Offender, Kung Fu Girls, Look Good in Blue
18. A Tribe Called Quest – People’s Instinctive Travels and the Paths of Rhythm: While not the first of the abstract hip hop bands to emerge from the east coast in the late 80’s, A Tribe Called Quest might be the Best. The Jazz samples, the clever rhymes, and the courage to experiment became calling cards for ATCQ and it’s all on display here. Plus you get the legendary balance and flow of Phife and Q-Tip, whose contrasting but similar styles meshed perfectly. There’s love, humor, social awareness and the type of bragging we are all used to in rap music with none of the thug, pimp or jerk stuff. What more do you need?
Recommended Tracks: Bonita Applebaum, Can I Kick It, I Left My Wallet in El Segundo, Ham n Eggs, Push it Along, Public Enemy
17. The Cars – The Cars: First you take the New Wave sound that is blowing up all over the east coast, then you take some good ol’ rock n roll which never goes out of style and add them together. What the Cars got from that formula was one of the great debuts ever. Every track on this record is good. How many bands can say that about their records let alone their first? The whole album is feel good, hanging with your friends type of music and plays as well today as it did over 30 years ago.
Recommended Tracks: Just What I Needed, Bye Bye Love, My Best Friend’s Girl, Good Times Roll, Moving in Stereo, Don’t Cha Stop
16. Television – Marquee Moon: If you are a fan of drugs and guitars, you might have heard of this record. Actually that’s not fair, as I only like guitars and I have it. That goes to show you the far reaching beauty of this classic debut release. The songs are not just songs, they are art and the extended bouts of guitar are not bothersome but awesome. Maybe the fact that Television dissolved shortly after helped to cultivate the legend but the small body of work the band left behind may be as creative or brilliant as anything any band has ever done.
Recommended Tracks: See No Evil, Marquee Moon, Friction, Venus
15. Ben Folds Five- Ben Folds Five: Much like Weezer impacted the nerds of the world, Ben Folds Five reached out to a similar demographic. Nerds, Geeks and Dweebs of all shapes and sizes chuckled at the witty lyrics and playful delivery of Ben Folds Five. Needless to say BFF didn’t achieve nearly the success and acclaim as Weezer did but on the bright side, that made them cooler for me. Plus while I think Weezer sometimes catered to pop culture, especially during the last decade, Ben only caters to himself and his own experiences. The songwriting on this record are on topics I relate to, understand and find extremely interesting. Plus it seems like there’s a little Elton John, Violent Femmes and They Might Be Giants in there, and if there is how can you complain about that? Ben’s smart-alecky yet non-obnoxiously delivered lyrics entertain and inform and the guitarless band proves a fun and still rocking sound on this debut.
Recommended Tracks: Philosophy, Underground, Julianne, Best Imitation of Myself, Where’s Summer B, Uncle Walter
14. Bruce Springsteen – Greetings From Asbury Park NJ: Here’s a record I didn’t actually hear until this past year (shame on me) but wow, what a great one. Something that is remarkable about this record and that is remarkable about pretty much every one on my list is that the music is so good, so advanced and so right that it is hard in most cases to believe that this is that artist’s first release. Bruce is light years ahead of 99.9% of debut songwriters on this 1st release. He started out way in front and stayed ahead of the pack for most of his career.
Recommended Tracks: Growin Up, It’s Hard to be a Saint in the City, Mary Queen of Arkansas, Blinded By the Light
13. The Clash – The Clash: This is one steady debut all the way through. It kicks your teeth down your throat with the first track, “Clash City Rockers” and continues to do so until the end. There’s fire and passion in abundance and they are just scratching the surface. I think on later records they became more focused in terms of where the fire and passion would go but on this record they are still at their best, just in a more raw way.
Recommended Tracks: White Riot, Clash City Rockers, Police and Thieves, Complete Control, Career Opportunities
12. Pink Floyd – Piper at the Gates of Dawn: This is one of those albums that blows people’s minds. It certainly blew the doors off of rock music and sent it in a new direction. Yeah the record sounds British but to compare this album to stuff that came out at the same time by The Beatles, Rolling Stones, The Who or anyone else is not valid… that’s how unique and distinctive the Pink Floyd sound is. The lyrics are beyond pop music. The guitar work and song structure or lack thereof was very creative and they still managed to have a top 10 album in the UK out of it. When you can be experimental and still very successful, that’s when you know you have something.
Recommended Tracks: See Emily Play, Astronomy Domine, Interstellar Overdrive, Bike, Lucifer Sam
11. New Order – Movement: If you know the history of the band, listening to this record is like listening to a haunting. The band was obviously still reeling from the loss of former singer Ian Curtis and this was the first step without him. The tracks are sad and yet darkly beautiful at the same time, a quality often shared by the Joy Division work. While not an overly long record, there’s plenty of quality to make up for the lack of quantity.
Recommended Tracks: Dreams Never End, I.C.B., Denial, Truth
10. The Smiths – The Smiths: How did British Rock music move from New Wave in the mid-80’s to Brit Pop, Shoegazer and the British Rock that dominated the 90’s? It was mostly The Smiths. They bridged the gap and created something that was imitated right away and very often, even deep into the 90’s. Many of the songs sounded like real art and Morrissey had a hypnotic voice capable of locking you in and making you a believer. For their existence The Smiths wrote a ton of excellent songs and this album like every other Smiths album is full of them.
Recommended Tracks: This Charming Man, Hand in Glove, What Difference Does it Make, Pretty Girls Make Graves
9. Bjork – Debut: When I think of the 90’s musically and what was excellent about it, I can’t help but think of Bjork. For a long while in that decade I was only into the male stuff: Nirvana, Beastie Boys, Violent Femmes, N.W.A, Beck, Tribe Called Quest, etc. but at some point I began to get a little curious. I got curious about this new stuff the ladies were listening to. I started to check out Tori Amos, PJ Harvey, and Bjork. Of the 3, and all 3 are great, I like Bjork best. I’d put on Debut and it’s like a big goofy smile for an hour. That’s what I’m talking about.
Recommended Tracks: Big Time Sensuality, Venus as a Boy, Human Behaviour, One Day, Violently Happy
8. Joy Division – Unknown Pleasures: Listening to this record should really be done with your eyes closed. If you let it, this album can take you away into a dreamworld the likes of which you never knew. I mean it. You should do this at night, turn the lights down, make sure you are alone or with people who will be silent, close your eyes and flip this on. It’s dreaming without being sleep. It is dark and wonderful.
Recommended Tracks: She’s Lost Control, Shadowplay, Insight, Disorder, Wilderness
7. Beastie Boys – License to Ill: It was inevitable right? With Run DMC and others emerging and beginning to put rap music on the map, it was only a matter of time that a novelty act emerged to help crossover the rap genre onto the pop charts. In this case the novelty was that these were 3 white guys but unlike nearly every novelty act that entered the genre afterward, these guys had the skills, charisma and style to pull it off for the long haul. Def Jam could have put any mediocre white rapper group together and they might have scored a hit and got white kids all over the burbs to buy their record but because the Beasties had the skills they not only scored a hit, they scored a monster #1 smash and a lengthy, noteworthy career. While their later work is more critically acclaimed, this record is pure fun.
Recommended Tracks: Fight For Your Right To Party, Brass Monkey, Girls, Paul Revere, Hold it Now Hit It, The New Style
6. Beck – Mellow Gold: I remember asking questions when “Loser” hit the airways: Who is this “loser“ guy? Are all his songs like this one? The answers are I still don’t know who he is and no, his songs are not like Loser. Over the course of his career Beck has experimented and tapped into so many genres that it’s hard to classify him. I believe Mellow Gold fell under the umbrella of Alternative because it was tough to figure out and consequently this record put a reluctant Beck as the figurehead of Generation X. When you hear all the work he’s done over the years this record isn’t that much of a surprise but consider those of us who heard this back when it came out and this is all we knew of him. We were scratching our heads but thoroughly fascinated. The record is creative and fresh and schizophrenic… but in a good way.
Recommended Tracks: Beer Can, Loser, Nitemare Hippie Girl, Pay No Mind, Soul Sucking Jerk
5. Doors – The Doors: "If the doors of perception were cleansed every thing would appear to man as it is, infinite. For man has closed himself up, till he sees all things through narrow chinks of his cavern." -Aldous Huxley. I didn’t hear this record until the early 90’s but once I did I couldn’t stop listening to it. To an 18 year old who is just finding himself, “The Doors” is like crack. Their redefinition of blues rock was unparalleled and combined with the lyrical content of the great poet Jim Morrison with his raw and passionate delivery made for one of the most explosive debut records of all time. Half the songs on this record are some of the best rock songs of all time. How many records, let alone debut records can make such a claim?
Recommended Tracks: Light My Fire, The End, Break on Through, End of the Night, Whiskey Bar
4. Elvis Costello – My Aim is True: Much like Beck but to a lesser extent, Elvis Costello sampled a lot of styles on the way to finding his own. Depending on which track you listen to you can hear traces of punk, folk, twang, new wave and even a little reggae. Even better than his multi-dimensional music style is his lyrical content and delivery. The lyrics are clever and well written with a sarcastic or maybe cynical streak and the vocal delivery is simply legendary.
Recommended Tracks: Alison, Watching the Detectives, Less Than Zero, Miracle Man, (The Angels Want to Wear My) Red Shoes
3. Jeff Buckley – Grace: Listening to the record the first time was reminiscent of the first time I had candy. I wasn’t sure what it was that I had just ingested but it was sweet, great and I had a natural attraction and strong feeling that it would become a permanent part of my life. This and Portishead’s Dummy are my go to albums when I am sad. I think that the tragic death of Buckley before releasing his 2nd record makes this album even more dramatic and more melancholy than it would have been received and remembered otherwise. His voice is quite possibly the best male voice I’ve ever heard in pop music and we will always be left wondering what might have been.
Recommended Tracks: Hallelujah, Lover You Should Have Come Over, Grace, Last Goodbye, Mojo Pin, Forget Her (added on as 11th track on reissues)
2. Portishead – Dummy: Speaking of Portishead’s Dummy, it grabs my #2 spot. This groundbreaking record has every thing I love in music: moody lyrics, strings, beats, razor sharp guitar riffs and a classic female vocal. They took all those things and melded it into a beautiful debut record. Nearly every song on this is a classic and still play as fresh and amazing as they did 15 years ago. This is one of those rare instances where a whole lot of good things are mixed together to make something greater. Too often we take good things, combine them with other good things and have less than good results but with Portishead and this record, it’s like Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups all around. This record is on my if you were stranded on a desert island and you could only take 5 CDs with you list.
Recommended Tracks: Glory Box, Numb, Strangers, Roads, Wandering Star, Mysterons, Sour Times
1. Guns N Roses - Appetite For Destruction: Once upon a time I was writing the names of bands like Cinderella, Def Leppard, and Ratt on my trapper keeper. I ate up all those power ballads and glam metal rock songs. Then one day I heard Appetite For Destruction. A short time later when my butt healed after Guns N Roses had whooped it, I began one of the most important musical journeys of my life when I realized there was more to life than Poison and there was certainly more to rock than Bon Jovi. Guns N Roses broke the chains that bound me to glam metal and from there, once free, I began to test the waters of hip hop, classic rock, alternative and later on indie rock, electronica, and underground things. It’s all because of this record. It takes no prisoners. Thank you Izzy Stradlin!
Recommended Tracks: Welcome to the Jungle, Paradise City, Sweet Child O’ Mine, Mr Brownstone, Out Ta Get Me
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
Somebody's Watching Me (2-17-10)
I was running very late this morning. It seems to happen every Wednesday because I go to see classic films at the Market Arcade on Tuesday nights and I always get in after 10. I know that doesn’t seem like very late but I’m the kind of person who is always wound up when I return home from being out, especially after seeing a phenomenal movie. It’s a big reason why I don’t go out much on weekdays. It took a few hours to wind down and get sleepy enough for bed. In fact I think it was after 1am when I finally fell asleep.
As a consequence when my alarm went off at 8 this morning I woke up only briefly. Something that is a blessing and a curse this time of year is my comforter. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t have some expensive high quality comforter. I probably have what would be considered a low end one but on these winter mornings when the temperature is always below the freezing point and that first arm or leg pops out of the covers and catches the chill I turtle back inside of them. Half asleep and in between two worlds I think it’s so warm and lovely inside why would I ever come out? Then I remember I have to get up, that’s why there was an alarm sounding. So I sneak an arm out from under the covers to grab the TV remote. Once I have it on and at the right volume I return the controller and my arm disappears back under the covers. That was a close one. There’s such a frosty chill in the air but it’s nice and toasty inside this comforter. I really begin to fixate on how great it feels to be so snug and comfy.
Before I know it, it’s an hour later. Oops! I swear I could get up if I really wanted to! This is something that happens to me every winter. If I don’t HAVE to be somewhere by a certain time, watch out! My work schedule is so flexible and the air is so chilly… it truly is a recipe for oversleeping.
I get out the door and catch the bus to work. As I approach my stop I begin to think, well I’m already late and I haven’t eaten anything yet, maybe I should pick up something on the way there. Yeah, that’s the ticket. Then once I get to work, I’m there the whole time until I pack it in for the day. On an afternoon where the weather may get annoying, one less trip in it is fine with me. Plus there are 2 little restaurants right at my stop. There’s a sandwich place and a Chinese place. Since I stopped at the sandwich place on Monday, I was leaning towards Chinese food today.
I went in and waited 3 minutes or so for someone to come out to the counter like usual. Once he came out I ordered and sat down. I sat facing the window so I could look out at Main Street and the big snowflakes drifting to the ground. I had to wait about 15 minutes for the food so I found myself staring out at Main Street watching the traffic and I drifted into dreamland. I was staring at one particular spot but then again I wasn’t looking at anything because I was inside my mind thinking about my day, planning things, imagining things and probably looking pretty dopey. Do you ever just stare at an object or in a direction and daydream? Do you wonder what your face looks like when you are drifting like that? I don’t. Unfortunately I was making that face for at least 5 minutes before I noticed the movement almost directly in my line of sight.
As it turned out I was staring out at the street and maybe a foot beneath where I was blankly focused (or unfocused) was someone in the passenger side of a car who was now looking in my direction. I immediately turned my head away. I began to feel embarrassed and quite ridiculous. I was staring right above where this person was sitting for 5 minutes! Did they think I was staring at them? It must have looked like it. Did I freak them out? Oh man, why didn’t I notice the person sitting there sooner? That car was there the whole time!
I wanted to get another look at this person just to see what they looked like but I was also mortified that I may have just made them very uncomfortable by staring at them for so long. How long did they know? I took several seconds and thought of ways I could look over there without looking over there. If only I had my black sunglasses. I could have looked in a nearby direction but semi-secretly looked right over at them. I had to figure out a way.
I began to think of ways and this question came over me… why did I need to look again? Why does that matter? Why do I need confirmation? What’s done is done I may as well go on with my day. Besides my food would be ready pretty soon and off to work I would go. Why did I need to look over there one more time? I couldn’t quite place it but something told me that something was off. I mean sometimes our eyes play tricks on us. After a few minutes of yes/no I should/I shouldn’t I finally looked over there casually.
The window was kind of fogged up and it wasn’t easy to see inside, at least not as easy as I thought I would be. Combine that with the now increasing flakes of snow coming down and it was not ideal visibility. I could make out that the person was not an adult because they were a little on the small side and only came up the seat ¾ of the way. Is it okay for an 8 year old to ride up front? I don’t know when it is but I’m pretty sure I rode up front from an earlier age than that so maybe it is but why wouldn’t the kid go inside with the adult? The person had been inside the restaurant next door for at least 5 minutes. Would most people leave a child in a car that long by themselves?
I snuck another look at the kid. The kid had long black hair that came down on and framed her face and peach colored skin but it was difficult to make out anything more than that with the light being brighter inside the restaurant I was in, the snow and with the windows of the car being fogged up a bit. While making that last look she looked right at me and I spun my head and eyes in another direction. Something wasn’t right about that kid. I waited a few seconds and took another look and now the kid was gone! I closed my eyes for a full second and opened them looking to refocus my gaze and the seat was empty. I began to run down all the possibilities. It’s a kid so maybe she’s crawling around the floor of the car. I used to do that. Sometimes you could find neat stuff down there. I remember finding loose change, lost toys and candy that I’ll never admit to eating when I was little and searching the floor of the family car.
I could hear the cook scraping the side of the pan meaning that my food was ready and they were making the transfer from pan to container. Soon I would be leaving and I had to walk right past the car so then I’d know for sure about that kid. I took another quick look over there and still no signs of life from the windows up. The man at the counter called for me and I got up to get my food.
As I headed towards the door of the restaurant I got excited about unraveling this mystery. Let’s not mention that this is a silly mystery of my own making. I live in the moment and this was an important moment. I saddled up and went outside. As I did two women came out of the restaurant next door. Would they be the owners of that car and/or the kid? I stopped and went into my pocket as if I had some urgent thing to do. I pulled out my phone as I stood there and acted like I was checking something as they did in fact move toward the car!
I looked up and still could not see anyone inside the car. Where is this kid? They reached the two front side doors of the car and I thought, was the kid supposed to be in back? If the kid was now on the floor, sleeping, searching, hiding or whatever they would react to it and I would know for sure. The passenger side female opened her door first and let out an “awwwww”. What?!? What’s the kid doing? I wonder if the kid is going to mention the creepy guy who was staring at her the whole time they were inside. I thought maybe I should get a move on and as I started to walk I took one last look at the car and saw the mid-sized dog now on the passenger’s lap.
So the mystery had been solved. It was not a kid sitting in that seat it was a dog. The dog was a black colored dog but with a peach colored face. Through a blurry fogged window, a steady snowfall and with the dog sitting upright in the seat I thought it was a little kid. As I began to make my way down the street I chuckled a few times. I thought to myself “Never a dull moment Ed”. I’m glad I found the answer to the mystery and my instincts informing me that there was something weird about the kid served me well. I’m glad I didn’t leave not knowing if I had accidently scared some kid and made them uncomfortable with my mindless staring out the window of that restaurant but strangely my curiosity grew so significantly that it drowned out my embarrassment. In the end, I had nothing to be embarrassed about. I stared like a zombie for 5 minutes in the direction of a dog without realizing it. The dog didn’t say anything so I think I’m good.
As someone who likes to try to read the signs and react appropriately when it comes to life I wondered what sign life was giving me this morning. What was the meaning of this mistaken identity mystery that wasn’t? What would I have learned from this? I’m thinking that I learned that I’m an idiot. I say that lovingly of course.
As a consequence when my alarm went off at 8 this morning I woke up only briefly. Something that is a blessing and a curse this time of year is my comforter. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t have some expensive high quality comforter. I probably have what would be considered a low end one but on these winter mornings when the temperature is always below the freezing point and that first arm or leg pops out of the covers and catches the chill I turtle back inside of them. Half asleep and in between two worlds I think it’s so warm and lovely inside why would I ever come out? Then I remember I have to get up, that’s why there was an alarm sounding. So I sneak an arm out from under the covers to grab the TV remote. Once I have it on and at the right volume I return the controller and my arm disappears back under the covers. That was a close one. There’s such a frosty chill in the air but it’s nice and toasty inside this comforter. I really begin to fixate on how great it feels to be so snug and comfy.
Before I know it, it’s an hour later. Oops! I swear I could get up if I really wanted to! This is something that happens to me every winter. If I don’t HAVE to be somewhere by a certain time, watch out! My work schedule is so flexible and the air is so chilly… it truly is a recipe for oversleeping.
I get out the door and catch the bus to work. As I approach my stop I begin to think, well I’m already late and I haven’t eaten anything yet, maybe I should pick up something on the way there. Yeah, that’s the ticket. Then once I get to work, I’m there the whole time until I pack it in for the day. On an afternoon where the weather may get annoying, one less trip in it is fine with me. Plus there are 2 little restaurants right at my stop. There’s a sandwich place and a Chinese place. Since I stopped at the sandwich place on Monday, I was leaning towards Chinese food today.
I went in and waited 3 minutes or so for someone to come out to the counter like usual. Once he came out I ordered and sat down. I sat facing the window so I could look out at Main Street and the big snowflakes drifting to the ground. I had to wait about 15 minutes for the food so I found myself staring out at Main Street watching the traffic and I drifted into dreamland. I was staring at one particular spot but then again I wasn’t looking at anything because I was inside my mind thinking about my day, planning things, imagining things and probably looking pretty dopey. Do you ever just stare at an object or in a direction and daydream? Do you wonder what your face looks like when you are drifting like that? I don’t. Unfortunately I was making that face for at least 5 minutes before I noticed the movement almost directly in my line of sight.
As it turned out I was staring out at the street and maybe a foot beneath where I was blankly focused (or unfocused) was someone in the passenger side of a car who was now looking in my direction. I immediately turned my head away. I began to feel embarrassed and quite ridiculous. I was staring right above where this person was sitting for 5 minutes! Did they think I was staring at them? It must have looked like it. Did I freak them out? Oh man, why didn’t I notice the person sitting there sooner? That car was there the whole time!
I wanted to get another look at this person just to see what they looked like but I was also mortified that I may have just made them very uncomfortable by staring at them for so long. How long did they know? I took several seconds and thought of ways I could look over there without looking over there. If only I had my black sunglasses. I could have looked in a nearby direction but semi-secretly looked right over at them. I had to figure out a way.
I began to think of ways and this question came over me… why did I need to look again? Why does that matter? Why do I need confirmation? What’s done is done I may as well go on with my day. Besides my food would be ready pretty soon and off to work I would go. Why did I need to look over there one more time? I couldn’t quite place it but something told me that something was off. I mean sometimes our eyes play tricks on us. After a few minutes of yes/no I should/I shouldn’t I finally looked over there casually.
The window was kind of fogged up and it wasn’t easy to see inside, at least not as easy as I thought I would be. Combine that with the now increasing flakes of snow coming down and it was not ideal visibility. I could make out that the person was not an adult because they were a little on the small side and only came up the seat ¾ of the way. Is it okay for an 8 year old to ride up front? I don’t know when it is but I’m pretty sure I rode up front from an earlier age than that so maybe it is but why wouldn’t the kid go inside with the adult? The person had been inside the restaurant next door for at least 5 minutes. Would most people leave a child in a car that long by themselves?
I snuck another look at the kid. The kid had long black hair that came down on and framed her face and peach colored skin but it was difficult to make out anything more than that with the light being brighter inside the restaurant I was in, the snow and with the windows of the car being fogged up a bit. While making that last look she looked right at me and I spun my head and eyes in another direction. Something wasn’t right about that kid. I waited a few seconds and took another look and now the kid was gone! I closed my eyes for a full second and opened them looking to refocus my gaze and the seat was empty. I began to run down all the possibilities. It’s a kid so maybe she’s crawling around the floor of the car. I used to do that. Sometimes you could find neat stuff down there. I remember finding loose change, lost toys and candy that I’ll never admit to eating when I was little and searching the floor of the family car.
I could hear the cook scraping the side of the pan meaning that my food was ready and they were making the transfer from pan to container. Soon I would be leaving and I had to walk right past the car so then I’d know for sure about that kid. I took another quick look over there and still no signs of life from the windows up. The man at the counter called for me and I got up to get my food.
As I headed towards the door of the restaurant I got excited about unraveling this mystery. Let’s not mention that this is a silly mystery of my own making. I live in the moment and this was an important moment. I saddled up and went outside. As I did two women came out of the restaurant next door. Would they be the owners of that car and/or the kid? I stopped and went into my pocket as if I had some urgent thing to do. I pulled out my phone as I stood there and acted like I was checking something as they did in fact move toward the car!
I looked up and still could not see anyone inside the car. Where is this kid? They reached the two front side doors of the car and I thought, was the kid supposed to be in back? If the kid was now on the floor, sleeping, searching, hiding or whatever they would react to it and I would know for sure. The passenger side female opened her door first and let out an “awwwww”. What?!? What’s the kid doing? I wonder if the kid is going to mention the creepy guy who was staring at her the whole time they were inside. I thought maybe I should get a move on and as I started to walk I took one last look at the car and saw the mid-sized dog now on the passenger’s lap.
So the mystery had been solved. It was not a kid sitting in that seat it was a dog. The dog was a black colored dog but with a peach colored face. Through a blurry fogged window, a steady snowfall and with the dog sitting upright in the seat I thought it was a little kid. As I began to make my way down the street I chuckled a few times. I thought to myself “Never a dull moment Ed”. I’m glad I found the answer to the mystery and my instincts informing me that there was something weird about the kid served me well. I’m glad I didn’t leave not knowing if I had accidently scared some kid and made them uncomfortable with my mindless staring out the window of that restaurant but strangely my curiosity grew so significantly that it drowned out my embarrassment. In the end, I had nothing to be embarrassed about. I stared like a zombie for 5 minutes in the direction of a dog without realizing it. The dog didn’t say anything so I think I’m good.
As someone who likes to try to read the signs and react appropriately when it comes to life I wondered what sign life was giving me this morning. What was the meaning of this mistaken identity mystery that wasn’t? What would I have learned from this? I’m thinking that I learned that I’m an idiot. I say that lovingly of course.
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