Words... some of my poetry

As I am psyching myself up to read poetry in front of strange faces in a familiar place I've been writing many poems. Not all to be read that night mind you, but it's cool to be writing so many lately. Below are 5 pieces I've written. A few are from this week, some from the last year or two. As part of the building courage part, here's me sharing some words with you:



“8 Blocks”


You made the 8 block walk in record form

And couldn’t wait to tell me what was wrong

I thought with time I could help to lift her spirits

But 8 days later she was gone.



While the pain was there I had no idea

She was being burdened by such a heavy load

I never thought the toughest person I knew would give up

There’s no use running when you’re on the wrong road



I remember when she used to think

That it was beautiful whenever I gave too much

She said to me don’t you ever stop giving

You’ll never know all the lives you’ve touched



But now I think of your face in memory

Instead of warming up to the corners of your smile

I’ll never forget the last thing you told me

A life lived for another is what’s really worthwhile





“Drift Away”


New month, new energy, imagination at play
Wondering if it is best to drift away
It’s not going to happen, gave it my best
My mind suspected but my heart never guessed
Syrup tinged gifts and words so sweet
A pride too prideful to admit its defeat
Anything was possible and it would have been given
A sleeping heart awoken and terribly driven

Unexpected but true, heartfelt and real
Blinded by a torch and a hopeful ideal
Couldn’t say no, couldn’t look concerned
Couldn’t say words that would go unreturned
Lying to myself and believing too much
Foolishly wishing this dream could be touched
A simple guy lost in a friendship misread
Should have known from the start I was in over my head





"completED"


caught between two worlds

the gravitational pull of passions

there's no indecision

everything is done on purpose



retreating from time to time

I am what I am

discouraged by the environment

hopeful for no reason



Lost on a familiar path

somewhere between compete and critique

between a snicker and a slap

I've scored too many points to be pointless



I sweat for a few smiles

It’s what I’ve always known

I find joy in what I create

It’s what I’ve had to learn



Consistent surprises

Whether it’s my hands or my feet

Lowered expectations

Or maybe just an afterthought



Tell me I love too much

I reply why don’t you?

It’s hard being everything to everyone

But it’s easy being me





“Finding”


Trying to live for today through yesterday

Painting on all the distractions to cover the cracks

Only to return to a home disguised as a temple

The only thing holy is his heart



To fall is divine but to get up is better

It makes him think that he has maintained control

Misguided enough to believe he has fallen on purpose

Too hard, too much, too deep, too easy, too bad



What are you trying to find around corners?

Trying to be what you think they want you to be

Only to feel terrible about looking in the mirror

In this search you’ve lost track of yourself



You get consumed by the thoughts of a kiss

And the whispers of an angel without wings

The decision has come down from the heavens

You are doing it all wrong




Walking With the Ghost


I used to be the one who hides but now I am the shadows

I used to have so much to say but now I am the whisper

When it all gets flipped around and I'm trying to remember where my feet go down

The gravity of the situation leaves me completely indifferent



I heard a few people say I've brushed with death

I heard a few people tell me that I am lucky

Then why do I feel like I hardly exist anymore except in dreams and memories

I lost a part of me that is gone forever yet I never say never



I saw the people coming and going around me

I saw the way everyone moved right past me

It takes some flukish event to even get the time of day from strangers and friends

I'm invisible when I sneak right past you making noise and making amends



This day is of my own making and so was the day before

This day may be tomorrow too if I don't figure out how to move

I've grown in some areas but maybe not where I need the most

I've grown from being the shadow into being the ghost